Speaking is an art.
Someone talks, the spring breeze on all sides; someone talks, embattled. How to speak, generous and decent, is very important.
The Book of Rites is one of the Confucian classics, which mainly records the emergence, content and changes of the etiquette system in the pre-Qin period, involving philosophy, history, morality, literature and art, customs and other aspects, of which there are a large number of philosophical sayings, incisive and profound.
Cain Niang recommends that you read the classic 10 sentences of the Book of Rites to know what "can speak".
Evil words do not come from the mouth, and words of anger do not come from the body.
- "Rituals and Sacrifices"
If you hurt others, you will never say it, and the insults of others will not spread on you.
[Enlightenment] If you don't humiliate others, you won't humiliate yourself.
Words must be concerned about their end, and deeds must be what they do, and the people are careful in their words and cautious in deeds.
- "Etiquette and Dressing"
Speaking must consider its consequences, and doing things must examine what drawbacks it will bring, so that everyone will speak cautiously and do things carefully.
【Feeling】Unobstructed mouth is not to be able to speak, it is most appropriate to be careful in words and deeds.
The gentleman promises, the villain presupposes.
- "Etiquette and Fangji"
[Interpretation] A gentleman says less and does more, while a villain is better at talking empty words than doing more.
[Feeling] Say more, not as good as doing well.
Words and deeds are also qualified. If you are born, you cannot seize your will, and if you die, you cannot take your name.
[Translation] Speak with a basis and do things with guidelines. Therefore, no one can change his ambitions while he is alive, and no one can deprive him of his good name when he dies.
【Perception】 We must have principles in speaking and doing things, and we must not open our mouths.
In the official dialect official, in the Fuyan Mansion, in the Kuyan Library, in the Chaoyan Dynasty.
- "Etiquette and Qu Lixia"
[Translation] Above the court, words and actions must be reasonable. Officials, governments, treasuries, and dynasties are all office places. In the appropriate workplace, talk about the matters that should be handled.
[Feeling] Wherever you are, say whatever you want, according to local conditions.
The elderly are not enough, no chán (interspersed) words. Be honest, listen to it.
- "Etiquette and Qu Lishang"
If the elder has not spoken to you, do not interject. Keep your appearance right and listen respectfully.
【Enlightenment】 Talk to the venerable leader, be humble and courteous.
It can be said, it is not feasible, and the gentleman is also said.
If you can say it, but if you can't do it, the gentleman won't say it.
[Enlightenment] If you have useful words, you can say them and do them. Speaking out, but not being able to do it, is nonsense.
Funerals do not speak of pleasure, sacrifices do not speak of murder, and the court does not speak of women.
During mourning, do not talk about happy things; during sacrifices, do not talk about murder; do not talk about women in official affairs.
【Perception】 Speak to see the environment, and if it is not in line with the environment, do not say.
Sitting in the sir, the gentleman asked, and finally it was right. "Etiquette and Qu Lishang"
If Mr. Waiter asks, he must wait until Mr. Gentleman has finished asking and then answer.
Don't interrupt sir, don't interject. Also when communicating with others, out of respect for each other, it is best not to take the initiative to interrupt others.
Words and deeds are not to be said. If you do it, you can't do it.
[Translation] When the words are finished, then go to action, and you can't just talk empty words. After doing it, it is followed by discussion, so you can't just go through the motions.
[Enlightenment] The unity of knowledge and action, the words spoken, only meaningful.