Saturday November 6, 2021 Sunny
When I returned home after two years in Hangzhou and Beijing, the first thing I did was to take my frail parents to live in my new home. In those two years, my parents and I did not see each other for a long time, sometimes I missed them very much, so I called my parents, and across the distance, the words between us were cordial and peaceful, very relaxed, and my heart felt particularly warm.
However, after returning to live in the new house with my parents, there was often a verbal altercation in the beginning, and I couldn't stand my parents' nagging, I couldn't stand them accumulating useless things and turning a corner of the new home into a garbage heap. My parents couldn't stand my accusations about their living habits, they ate greasy, heavy taste, and didn't like sports, I always liked to talk about them, and if they didn't get along, they quarreled. After arguing, I regret it, so I often wonder if it was a mistake for me to take them over.
The living habits of the two generations are very different, the values are different, the pursuit of life, the aesthetics of the world, each has its own imprint of the times. All love in the world is for the sake of being together, but when the living people are together, they become distant. It is close at hand, but the soul has run away, and the heart is together, but it is far away from thousands of mountains and rivers, far away from the smell, which is the paradox of emotion.
However, we can only seek common ground while reserving differences. In terms of living habits, I often patiently give them science as a doctor, telling them that patients with diabetes, hypertension, and coronary heart disease should have a low-salt, low-fat, sugar-free diet, exercise more, eat more protein, vegetables, melons and fruits, and coarse grains, and teach them nutritional collocation. At the same time, encourage them to go out of the door and exercise more, life lies in movement, only movement can make their lives full of vitality.
Slowly, my parents also ate lightly under my guidance, and the nutritional mix was also very rich. Every day, Dad took Mom to the street to buy vegetables and walk around, Dad fought with others to get landlords, and Mom was also interested in watching on the side.
Home cooking, laundry and other chores are contracted by the father, but also have to take care of the poorer health of the mother's diet and living, the original poor health of the father also did a lot of fun, the father also laughed and said: I have not served anyone in my life, before your mother served me, when I am old, it will be reversed, it is my turn to serve your mother, this is "cause and effect". I laughed and said, "Yes, there is a cause and an effect!" It's good, take turns taking care of it!
When a person is old, the greatest loneliness in the world is still longing for the embrace of love, without love, the world is incomplete. Parents are old, and only by caring for and caring for each other can they get rid of loneliness. They still crave the love of their children and cook for us every day just to have a meal with their family. So, every day, I pushed away the outside socializing as much as possible and went home to dinner with my parents as much as possible.
After moving to our new home, I felt that my parents' bodies were getting more and more energetic day by day, and their mental state was getting better and better, unlike when I first came back, my mother was sick. It seems that moving in with us has a lot of benefits for parents, and this is the right thing to do.
Although we are under the same roof as our parents, they also have their own space, we slowly try to interfere in the lives of our parents as little as possible, when they need help, we will try to help them do it, when they want to do something themselves, we will never point fingers again. Because I don't want to have regrets in the future, when they leave us one day, I don't want to be upset that there are too many contradictions and arguments when they are together. After getting along in this way, our two generations have slowly become more peaceful and harmonious.
Parents have their own lives, and we too, we can still do what we love, and everyone has their own space. On weekends, my father took my mother outside for a walk and played cards, while I accompanied my husband to go fishing. He was fishing by the pond, and I walked first in the mountains, looking at the late autumn blue sky, the fruitful fruit of the grapefruit trees on the side of the road, and a flock of chickens and ducks pacing and foraging in the fields, the roosters chirping from time to time, the frogs chirping a few times, the birds chirping in the woods, the tanuki cats meowing alone, the water ducks paddling over the pond, and the egrets descending from the sky to the water.
All this made me forget all the entanglements and desires of the world, so I found a chair in the courtyard of a farmer to sit down and enjoy the scenery, read a book, and study. This yard is just by the pond, and in front of me is a beautiful landscape painting, where I breathe in the fresh air, watching the pumpkin flowers and huge pumpkins under my feet, and butterflies dancing on the flowers and grasses, such a pastoral life is really fascinating.
Unfortunately, at noon, suddenly the clouds were thick and the sky was dark, and it began to rain heavily for a while, so my husband and I hurried to our car and got into the car, so that we were not wet by the heavy rain. Enshi is always like this, rainy days account for one-third of the year, in the rain, we always feel a gloomy, heavy feeling. It seems that winter is coming, and the cold is not far away. But it's good that we have four seasons here.
And Guangzhou's four seasons such as summer, are very hot, call my daughter, yesterday the daytime temperature is still more than thirty degrees Celsius, she is still very worried about us, but also took the initiative to call us. We chatted in our WeChat group every day and greeted each other. I remembered that in beijing, when I accompanied her to study in the second and third years of high school, she would stay at home as much as possible, unwilling to go to school, and did not go to the classroom to study at night, but to study at home. In fact, I always analyzed the reasons later, when the competition was so fierce, why did this child give up the opportunity to get the teacher's personal tuition and answer questions at school, and stay at home with me?
I think my daughter wants to spend as much time with me as possible and experience more of her mother's love. However, when I am with my daughter, I am often absent-minded, just playing with my phone, or talking to friends, etc., she will be very annoyed and feel that I do not value the time with her.
In fact, each of us longs to be loved, we are obsessed with finding love, taking love as food, constantly seeking, constantly eating, so that we can eat and drink enough, and maintain inner peace. Parents and children want our love, and we want the same love from them, which makes our world no longer barren and lonely, and makes our lives beautiful. Especially this kind of love between relatives, it is the longest in the world, even if the sky is barren and old, it can still remain in the depths of memory and be engraved in the world.