Mention separation
Some people think it is the only way to divorce
But now many people use it to guard love
The Japanese national goddess Niigaki Yui announced her marriage for more than 5 months, but at this sweetest time, she was found to be separated from her husband Hoshino Gen.
They live in the same neighborhood in Hiroo, Minato-ku, Tokyo, but usually return to their apartments after a busy day, and only live together when both of them are free.
Some fans can't understand: why do you have to live apart when you are married?
There is even speculation that the two may have a marriage change.
The life of getting married and living apart is simply the most ideal form of marriage in my mind.
If you want to meet, go to each other's house, want to be alone in your own space, and most importantly, you don't have to worry about not being able to sleep because of your other half snoring and grinding your teeth.
The quality of life improves, and the feelings may be better.
The "separated marriage" lifestyle is also being embraced by young people. Having a relatively independent space is also becoming a catalyst for intimate relationships.
There's a line in the recent hit "Married Life," "You can't ask for eternal intimacy, it's easy to get bored." ”
Separated marriages are becoming a way for today's young people to resist boredom.
01
Live separately after marriage,
It is a common choice of two people
On May 19 this year, Niigaki Yui announced her marriage, and countless people directly called out the loss of their wives.
The boss of more than one company in Japan has issued a "vacation notice" to the company, allowing fans of the knot to go home to heal their wounds due to excessive sadness.
How sensational the marriage news was at that time, and now everyone pays much attention to the direction of the relationship between the two people.
At the end of June, the last episode of "Dragon Sakura 2" began broadcasting. Yu Yi made a cameo appearance, the image was plump, and there was even a tendency to slightly gain weight, so many people suspected that she was pregnant.
Dragon Sakura 2
Now that half a year has not arrived, sharp-eyed fans have found a new clue in an advertising film: How did the knot suddenly lose weight? The face has become longer and the chin has become pointed?
Then the association immediately began: Was she wronged after marriage? Even if you don't live with Hoshino Gen, the relationship between the two people will definitely not be good.
Yuki starred in the latest Meiji chocolate commercial
Unfortunately, from the current point of view, these are all excessive interpretations by fans.
The relationship between the two is still intact, and the reasons for making this choice are also reasonable.
After Yui Niigaki issued the marriage notice in May, he immediately threw himself into the filming of the 2022 NHK Okawa drama "The Thirteen Kings of Kamakura".
This may be her last film. She announced to Hoshino that she would not renew her contract with the firm. In the future, Yui is likely to retreat behind the scenes.
Therefore, she is particularly serious about this job, plus the protagonist involved a variety of venues and complex lines, often filming on the set until midnight.
After work, Yui usually returns to his home, and recently he has raised foliage plants to relax himself.
Some people will ask, shouldn't you be with your husband at this time?
But Yui didn't do that, and it was only when he didn't have a job and Hoshino was on vacation that the two would go to one of them' houses for the night.
Hoshino not only did not complain about this, but also felt very happy. This has a lot to do with Hoshino's state.
Today, Hoshino is still active in the front line as a singer, and he is usually very busy.
In his opinion, two people do not have to stick together every day, and they feel very happy when they sit down to eat a meal and chat about what they have seen and heard for a day.
Of course, if they get into trouble, they will still face it together. Even if it's past 1 a.m., they'll still make a pot of tea and listen carefully to each other's thoughts.
Hoshino Said as a guest on the variety show Audrey Everywhere: "Yui is the person I want to spend my life with, so there will always be endless topics between the two people. ”
The relatively independent personal time and space give them the opportunity to grow individually, and when they meet again, they also have more freshness.
02
Keep a little distance,
It is the lubricant of marriage
The marital status of Yui Niigaki and Hoshino Gen is known in the West as the living apart together couple (LAT couple for short).
LAT couple mainly refers to two kinds of partners, one is to want to live together, but can not yet achieve; the other is for various reasons to voluntarily live separately.
From the French philosophers Sartre and Beauvoir in the 1930s to today's director Tim Burton and actress Helena, many have lived this life.
Sartre and Beauvoir
Couples who prefer to remain relatively independent will choose to live in their respective apartments. Directors Woody Allen and Mia Farrow, for example, live in New York's Central Park, but come home every day and open two different doors.
So did actress Gwyneth Paltrow and husband Brad Farchak. The two maintain a "semi-separated" state every week, returning to their respective homes for 3 days out of 7 days and living together for 4 days.
Some people also feel that it is a little inconvenient to run at both ends when they are married, so they sleep in separate beds at home.
Wang Weizhong, the godfather of variety shows in Taiwan, chose such a way of life.
After the children grew up and moved out, he and his wife transformed the 300-square-meter house.
The bedroom where the daughter slept was converted into another master bedroom with the addition of a sliding door. The door was pulled up, and the couple immediately had a relatively independent small space, and even the bathroom had its own room.
A friend said that you are more like a roommate.
Wang Weizhong didn't care. He knew that snoring while he slept could affect his wife's rest. Now that the two people are older, it is better to make a slight change in the housing so that both people can sleep more comfortably.
Li Ai, the host of "Talk Show Conference", also admitted that he was married for 4 years and separated for 4 years.
Her husband is her agent, and the two of them are already like conjoined babies at work, and if they still live in the same room, they have no personal space almost 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
The split bed gave them a chance to catch their breath.
Now at home, the two occasionally chat on their mobile phones and send each other cute memes when they are in their respective rooms. There are also places where you can be alone and calm after a quarrel, and even a passion that is common when you return to the period of love.
03
The form of marriage for modern young people,
There is nothing that cannot be done,
Only you can't think of it
The two-headed marriage that was hotly discussed a while ago is actually a form of marriage and living apart.
Fei Xiaotong mentioned in "Gangcun Economy" that "two flower flags" are hung, and when getting married, the man does not have to give a dowry, and the woman does not have to prepare a dowry. After marriage, the two can live in their own house, and if they want to meet, they can also go to each other's house.
I also have friends around me who want to have their own space, but they feel that it is inconvenient to get married and not live together, so they prefer to live under the same roof and sleep in separate rooms.
During the honeymoon period, most people are eager to stick together 24 hours a day. But after a long time together, there are always a few days when you want to breathe.
As Schopenhauer said, people are like hedgehogs, they need to keep each other warm in intimate relationships, and if they are too close, they may stab each other.
At this time, if you have a bedroom of your own, you will be satisfied with the joy of being alone.
The Japanese drama "Day Face" was dubbed "a reflection on marriage" and set off a wide range of social discussion after it was broadcast.
What impressed me the most was a quote by Rikako, "Marriage is the exchange of loss of enthusiasm for stability." ”
But now it seems that it is not impossible to have enthusiasm and stability at the same time.
People in today's society are busy enough every day, with independent space, as if giving themselves a chance to escape. This escape is not under the fence, it may just allow yourself to sit paralyzed on the bed, or you don't have to think about cleaning up the bed for 10 minutes.
Text, Editor/Itsuki
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