When I brushed Weibo a few days ago, I saw an interesting topic. Probably saying that Du Haitao recently had a birthday, and Shen Mengchen, who used to send Weibo to celebrate his birthday, was unexpectedly absent this year, so some gossipers asked curiously: Are they really going to break up? In recent years, every once in a while, "Shen Mengchen and Du Haitao, after eight years of love, have not been married, is this marriage impossible?" "This topic is going to be taken out and discussed. If you go to the comment area under this topic, you will find that it is nothing more than the following arguments: "Eight years together, dragging girls..." "Du Haitao doesn't want to get married at all, Shen Mengchen is too humble" "This pair is going to break up, it is sooner or later" Even someone directly shouted Shen Mengchen, let her not be stupid, as a girl, there are still a few eight years that can be delayed?
In fact, similar love dilemmas abound in life. As long as it is a couple who have been in love for many years but have not married for a long time, they must not escape the "pursuit" of the leisurely public.
"Boys must not want to get married."
"Isn't it good to get married early, what should I do at any age?"
"This girl's youth has been delayed..."
Kan Qingzi once said in a show: "A man does not want to marry you, which means that he does not love you enough." ”
There is also a similar plot in the movie "Not Getting Married", the male protagonist Ajia and the female protagonist Keyi have been in love for five years, but Ajia, who has never planned to enter marriage, makes Keyi very cold, and Keyi begins to doubt whether he really loves himself, and even later gave up this relationship.
These just confirm the truest attitude of most people to love:
Used to using the "willing to marry" thing to judge the sincerity of another person.
Of course, there are also some people who disagree with this view and will tell you: "If he really loves you, it doesn't matter if he has that marriage contract."
Honestly, of these two views, it's hard for me to say which one I agree with more.
I've always felt that they seem to be competing, but they revolve around the same uncomfortable core:
It's like getting an exam paper to judge the value of life, and you open it to see that there is only one exam question — love and marriage.
And the right to score is all in the hands of the person you are in love with. It is as if only the attitude of the other person can verify the meaning and value of your existence.
If you finally enter marriage, that's fine, congratulations on handing over a perfect answer sheet for life;
If you finally break up, then the relationship will become a loss-making business, and you will lose your wife and fold the army.
As you get older, you gradually find that there are not a few people around you who will be troubled by this inherent concept. A while ago, I had dinner with my friends, and when I saw Ah Xin, who had always been optimistic, I didn't show my face, and when I asked, I realized that I was also experiencing the headache of being urged to marry. Ah Xin and her boyfriend have been in love for seven years, the relationship is very good, and the two people in the rising career period agreed to marry a few years later. Completing each stage step by step is their consistent planning and consensus. However, he was strongly opposed by relatives and friends on both sides, especially Ah Xin's family. Under the repeated offensives of a family, Ashin's sentence "We have no plans to get married for the time being" seems pale and weak. Ah Xin said that she could understand her family's concern for her, but the sentence that they hung up on their lips, "You are not old enough, and you will be delayed if you do not marry again", it is really uncomfortable. I understand the reason for her "discomfort", this sentence seems to express "the direction of this relationship, completely depends on the decision of the boy alone." An independent girl like her has a hard time accepting this imposed sense of passivity. I also understand the anxiety of Ah Xin's family, who will feel that if a relationship does not end up in the right place, it is a waste of time. But is that really the case? I've seen a concept called "fireworks love." What it expresses is that the quality of love is not determined by the length of time, and it is related to its excitement. It's like watching a gorgeous firework, although it lasts a short time, it will stop in your heart forever. Yes, the quality of love has nothing to do with the ending, nor does it have anything to do with the length of time. When it blooms, it illuminates a certain part of your life, which is the meaning of walking with that person. And the ending of two people, in fact, in addition to marriage, there are thousands of possibilities.
