Famous screenwriter Matthew. Gray. In Guber's first book, The One and Only You, We describe this character:
He has 5 crooked teeth, 3 hairs, green skin, a little bigger left foot than his right foot, and lives in a drainage ditch.
He had no friends, the only friends were corn candy men made from garbage and scrap himself.
He wanted to go to the party, but he was worried about his hair.
His name is Lampe Butkap, and he is like us who are always staring at our flaws and afraid of socializing.
1, we have all been confused
There is a saying that whose youth is not confused, but in fact, in our life path, it is not only youth that feels confused.
Each stage has a different confusion:
When you go to school, you will feel confused about your own efforts, it seems that others do not work hard, you can get good results; it seems that other people's parents are always more amiable than their own parents;
When working, you will feel confused about your own choices, as if your own choices are always not as good as others; it seems that other people's future is always better than your own;
When you are in love, you will be confused, take the other party's evaluation very seriously, be anxious about your appearance and ability, and be confused about the future.
In fact, these confusions are normal, when going to school, we do not have enough cognitive ability, do not know that behind the achievements of others, is secretly working hard;
When we are working, we have not yet reconciled with life, and what we show to others every day is just the part that we want to show;
When we are in love, our hearts are not so strong, and we will always be emotionally tied up by each other's behavior.
But these will be as we grow older and more experienced, step by step away from us.
We no longer only look at the surface, but also learn to look inside, we not only listen to what others say about ourselves, but also know how to affirm ourselves.
So, what are you afraid of?
We will only be confused for a while, and it will not be a lifetime.
2, we are all different
Lampe Butkap was different, his looks, his temperament, he was always immersed in his own world, inferior.
The same is true of many of us, who are different from others and can easily become a source of inferiority.
For example, I, growing up, I was confused by my strong calves, and after dressing freely, I never went to buy a skirt, because I thought such a strong calf was too ugly.
But then I found out that everyone has low self-esteem, some people think they are too fat, some people think they look too mature, and some people think their arms are too thick and their necks are too short.
It's a lot of things, each with its own ideas.
But in fact, you don't feel weird when the other person doesn't say these self-righteous shortcomings.
Yes, we are all different, but the person who thinks of ourselves as different is ourselves.
In the eyes of others, there is actually not much difference.
3, accept the unique, accept yourself
No one prescribes how a person should live in his life, nor does anyone prescribe what kind of person he must become.
Each of us is unique and needs to accept it ourselves.
This is reconciliation with life, reconciliation with oneself.
When we reconcile with ourselves, we will no longer fight with ourselves, those things that cannot be changed, or things that make our mentality change poorly, and the competition cannot be changed, let's reconcile.
Anything that cannot be solved at the moment can be properly delayed, and after a certain period of time, the solution to it will naturally appear.
This is not chicken soup, life is originally like this, some things, because of the limitations of ability and vision at that time, and even mentality, can not be solved, but at a certain time, these things will be naturally solved.
Just like my strong calves, I thought of a lot of ways to compete with it, but there was no way to change it, and finally, I put it together now, and now it is still the same as before, but I am no longer bothered by it.
And when I don't care about it, people all over the world don't care about it.
"Being born lonely doesn't mean being alone, trying bravely, even if you take a small step, you will have the hope of being seen." 」
Therefore, if you want to do something, do it, don't wait until later, and meet people who want to see it, don't only promise.
As soon as you take a step forward, you will feel the sky changing.
Life is like this, you think you often ignore, but in the end, you find that the slightest change in yourself will be surprised.
More self-confidence, living in this world, all our efforts are to make ourselves a unique self.