On the evening of November 12, 2020, Li Moumou had a verbal altercation with his mother, and then he clashed with his mother emotionally, which eventually led to the death of his mother.
At 6:40 a.m. on November 13, 2020, Mr. Li surrendered himself to the public security organs.
After the police investigated the scene, they learned about the incident. On November 16, 2020, the Xuanwu Branch of the Nanjing Municipal Public Security Bureau issued a case report on the case of the mother-killing of a high school student in Nanjing.
According to relevant reports, Li Moumou and his mother have been living in the community near the school, and their daily life is handled by their mother, and their father rarely appears in the life of mother and son.
Usually, my mother disciplines Li strictly and attaches great importance to learning. On the day of the crime, Li Moumou wrote homework at home, because the homework had not been written, so the mood was a little impatient, but the mother on the side completely ignored his emotions, still harshly preached, accompanied by more intense verbal abuse.
It was his mother's insults that made Li Moumou's emotions explode instantly, so under the impulse, he went to the kitchen to get a kitchen knife, cut at his mother's upper body, and finally killed his mother.
After seeing his mother lying in a pool of blood, Li Moumou did not call the police or call 120. Then he changed into clean clothes and spent the night at his classmates.
The next day he came to the school to explain the situation to the teacher, and eventually called himself in the teacher's office.
After the case was exposed, it aroused widespread public attention, and it was difficult for people to believe that a high school student could actually kill his own mother simply because he was abused by his mother.
In recent years, the case of mother-killing has been reported many times, it seems that this has made the "mother" a high-risk profession, and the children raised by their own hands have actually ended their lives fiercely, and it is difficult to imagine how ironic and sad this should be!
In addition to the fierceness of the child, we can't help but wonder if there is a problem with the education of parents at present.
Although parents do not need to go through any assessment or assessment, it has to be said that parenting is a more complicated and more difficult thing than any job.
How to be a good mom? Perhaps, this is something that should be considered more before raising children.
<h1>
"If I were a murderer, would you still love me?" </h1>
The writer Wang Shuo always appears in front of the public with his maverick side, and his unique style and unique perspective make people's cognition of this writer always biased towards the "living sober" hanging.
But even if he lived so transparently, when talking about his relationship with his mother, he still couldn't get rid of the alienation from his childhood and the desire for his mother's love.
In 2007, he joined his mother in a show called Psychometric Interviews. In the show, the estrangement between mother and son is visible to the naked eye, of course, until the end of the show, the two people did not usher in the end of the headache and crying back to a good ending.
Among them, impressively, in the interview, Wang Shuo mentioned to his mother more than once, "If I were a murderer, would you still love me?" ”
When he insisted over and over again to get an answer from his mother, we could feel that he wanted to get his mother's unconditional love, but in the end, his mother replied, "I will report you." ”
So the whole show is carried out in an awkward and alienated confrontation, even if the mother tries to express that she and Wang Shuo are very close, but Wang Shuo repeatedly denies it.
In the face of his mother's deliberate flattery, he showed a natural indifference and resistance. It seems that this state of longing for closeness between relatives but not being able to get close to each other is not uncommon in Chinese families.
Parents and children are the closest relationship, but they become strange and distant as their children grow up.
So what is quietly changing the love of children for their parents?
<h1>Moms, please don't overdraft your child's love for yourself</h1>
1. Separation at an early age can hurt a child
Much of the estrangement of parent-child relationships stems from the separation of parents and children at an early age.
The child's absence from the mother when it is most necessary to establish a sense of intimacy with the mother will inevitably make the child's mental security feel damaged, and then produce a negative psychological state of being abandoned.
The fragility of the emotional link in childhood also laid a time bomb for the shaping of parent-child relationship and parent-child education in the future.
2. Excessive education methods can make children very hurt
Perhaps in the eyes of mothers, the strict way of educating children is out of the heart for their own good, but in fact, when mothers ask themselves, excessive education methods are inevitably mixed with their own venting of negative emotions.
For example, anxiety about the inability to educate, frustration about the failure to compare, and so on. And the scolding and insults that arise from this will be like a knife to the soft heart of the child.
3. Don't know how to respect the child's appearance
It can hurt children when they realize that they are independent individuals, and when children have the ideas they want to express, what they most desire is to be respected by their mothers.
If the mother at this time is blinded by the desire for control, if the mother at this time is blocked by the dictatorship, then the parent-child relationship at this time will be in a state of extreme inequality, and the child who is not respected will naturally not be able to respect the mother.
<h1>Becoming a mother is something that moms need to learn hard</h1>
1. The mother's education requires skill
Psychologist Adler once said that the mother's skill refers to the embodiment of the ability to cooperate with the child, but this ability to cooperate does not apply to dogma.
Obviously, when mothers blindly reason with their children, or forcefully demand that their children obey themselves, the educational posture they display is very stupid and ignorant.
2. Pay attention to the establishment of the connection between mother and child
Every step of a child's growth is irreproducible, like an episode-after-episode series, and if you miss this episode, you can only continue to watch the next episode, without replaying or replaying.
If you want your education to be accepted by your children, then this must be based on intimate kinship. Whether it is early childhood or childhood, mothers should devote more time and energy to emotional management with their children.
3. Don't turn love into a burden on your child
When her mother became an adult, she forgot her childhood wishes. Therefore, many mothers, even if they are for the good of their children, often "do not meet the words".
It is as if the child wants to eat an apple, and the mother has given him a cart of pears with all her strength, and the child does not like to eat pears, so he feels that this car of pears is a burden, and at this time, the mother who pays all will feel that the child wasted her heart.
Educationalist Sukhomlinsky said that maternal love is not based on abstract rational cognition, it should be based on rich emotional expression.
Therefore, motherhood is not a simple thing, and the process of parenting requires mothers to understand and learn more than to give their children life.
What views do you share on the management of the mother-child relationship?