01
Someone said, "The definition of marriage is: get one person, lose the whole world." ”
When a person encounters true love, he will understand that love cannot be shared with others, but needs to be enjoyed exclusively.
When a person shares his love with others, it means that he is planning to give up this love, and he is not generous.
When getting married, everyone hopes that the marriage can always be happy, without any extraneous branches.
When it comes to extramarital feelings, most people are "talking about tiger discoloration". However, once these things happen to you, you have to face them, and avoidance is not the way to do it after all.
Reality tells us that when a man has an extramarital love, it is easy to be forgiven; it is different to be a woman.
In ancient times, women who betrayed marriage were to be "soaked in pig cages" and were also called "broken shoes". It's really unfair, but it can't be changed.
Perhaps, under the influence of traditional thinking, it is more difficult for women to get rid of the influence of love outside of marriage.
In fact, when a woman has an affair outside of marriage, if she can do the following things well, the ending will be better, and I hope you have an epiphany.
02
First, stay calm and see the truth.
Love mentor Tu Lei said: "As a woman, either talk about love and then get married, or be proudly single, don't use your beautiful youth to train others' future husbands, and be so serious." ”
How many women, when love comes, are blinded by happiness, and their IQ immediately becomes zero. Many men have seized this point and let women fall into the vortex of feelings and find it difficult to extricate themselves.
To put it bluntly, men's rhetoric is a process of "brainwashing" that makes you feel beautiful, but it is actually a mirage, and all the beauty is an illusion.
When you calm down, you will find that men who say they love you but cannot marry you have the following goals.
The first is to see the color, he is just lustful, not really for you. When you are old and yellow, he turns around and disappears, looking for a more beautiful person.
The second is to covet your value. Through your "connections," he can get what he wants.
For example, if you are the leader of a company, he can pretend to be in love with you, and then take down the project or sign a contract from the enterprise and get benefits.
The third is to be very casual with feelings. He's just bored and wants to be with you and pass the time.
The fourth is that he is really in love with you and cannot extricate himself, but the family conditions do not allow it, or both people have a marriage, and they cannot fall in love and marry freely. Everything is involuntary.
In terms of feelings, men are more rational, and his actions are often profitable. If you see it clearly, you will know where to go, at least you will not be fooled.
Any relationship has a process from enthusiasm to blandness, you see the truth, the feelings become flat faster, for you, it is definitely a good thing.
03
Second, make a decision on the spot and learn to make trade-offs.
Cartoonist Zhu Deyong said: "The purpose of marriage is to warn you not to trust your judgment too much. ”
In other words, it is difficult to accurately judge love and marriage. This is the confusion of the "authorities fans".
Whether you can see love clearly or not, you will definitely go to the "how to choose" step.
With the passage of time, love outside of marriage will eventually be exposed. Where are the impermeable walls? Where is there paper that can keep the fire?
Instead of waiting until a choice is inevitable, it is better to make a decision earlier. Indecisiveness will hurt you.
Xiao Hong, a female writer in the Republic of China, has many literary works and great achievements, but emotionally, she is a "bitter woman".
Xiao Hong has had several marriages, but none of them are beautiful. The first marriage was arranged by the family, and the lover Wang Enjia. In marriage, she fell in love with her distant cousin Lu Zhenshun.
In the swing between left and right, Xiao Hong chose to return to the family, but when she was pregnant, her lover Wang Enjia disappeared.
Xiao Hong wrote in "Abandoned Children": "For 7 months, a total of 400 yuan was owed to (the hotel). Mr. Wang could not come back. The man is not there, (the owner of the hotel) of course has to settle the score with the woman..."
Yes, literature comes from life, higher than life. The article written by Xiao Hong is not her own helplessness in those years?
Women, learn to make trade-offs, and be with the right people. If you meet two people who deserve to be loved deeply at the same time, or if you meet someone who hates each other late after marriage, you must make a decision and don't waver all the time.
Your heart is "uncertain" and then you will lose all the people who love you. Fish and bear paws, you can't have both.
For the matter of stepping on two boats with one foot, anyone will "hate", that is, the man who loves you to the bone will also quietly bury "a needle" in his heart.
04
Third, learn to turn and change relationships.
When you meet someone you love but can't get along with in the future?
There should be several situations: strangers, friends, brothers and sisters, acquaintances, enemies, confidants.
It is best to be a confidant, have a sharp heart for each other, and keep each other silently. At critical times, they can also help each other. One word can warm the heart; one look represents everything.
However, to be a confidant, it is difficult to grasp the measure. As long as it is crossed, it will once again fall into the emotional dilemma.
Therefore, choosing to be a stranger, a hundred, although ruthless, but "just like ruthless and the most emotional."
Turning the lover relationship into an ordinary relationship, you are slowly quitting, leaving yourself a way out.
In this life, people will eventually have regrets. Treat regret as good, and you are really beautiful.
Writer Jimmy said: "All the sadness, always leave a trace of joy clues, all regrets, will always leave a perfect corner, I am in the frozen deep sea, looking for the gap of hope, but when I wake up, I glimpse the beautiful sunshine." ”
The mind turns, and the tenderness that remains in the depths of the soul will last a long time, allowing you to return from the edge of pain to real life.
05
"People have sorrows and joys, and the moon has clouds and sunshine, and this matter is difficult to complete in ancient times".
Love is divided and combined, don't blame anyone, and don't complain about fate.
In the future, continue to live well with regrets, be your own queen, and you are the winner of life.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.