Recently, Ariel Lin responded to the news of production through her agent, and both mother and daughter were safe. As early as when Ariel Lin officially announced her pregnancy, there were many harsh ridicules, such as "she can finally gain a foothold in the giants."
In recent years, under the rendering of unscrupulous media, Ariel Lin has almost become a female representative of "three from four virtues":
A picture of "walking with her father-in-law" was interpreted as "Ariel Lin got up early every day to serve her in-laws", and the hard work of preparing for pregnancy for 7 years was accused of "Ariel Lin needs a stable position for the child". Even if she herself responded in detail on Weibo that she was not as humble as the outside world, netizens still ignored it.
This phenomenon is worth discussing, because whether it is from the industry's reputation or from the perspective of choice in reality, Ariel Lin is undoubtedly a diligent and hard-working female star, why is she caught in a dilemma of "how to do it is not right"?
Writer Zhang Chun said, "As a woman, you have to have your own career, but it is not right for you to have too much career; you have to be beautiful, but you can't love pretty too much, and if you love pretty too much, you are vain."
Because as long as you don't meet society's expectations of women, then you are wrong. But this social expectation is so changeable and contradictory. So many women will feel: Why can't I do it right?
Where is Ariel Lin's "mistake"?
Ariel Lin was born in 1982 and her parents divorced when she was 5 years old. In her second year of high school, her mother had an unexpected stroke, and Ariel Lin learned that her family had been in debt of more than 3 million Taiwan dollars (about 700,000 yuan) because of education and living expenses.
Since then, Ariel Lin, who is still an adult, has assumed the pressure of supporting her family early. In order to win a prize of 30,000 yuan, Ariel Lin participated in the "Taipei MRT Girl" competition and won the championship, and began to appear in the public eye.
In 2002, Ariel Lin starred in the TV series "18-year-old engagement" and officially stepped into the show business circle. Since then, Ariel Lin has opened the "Desperate Three Ladies" mode, and has received 13 dramas in 6 years, in order to successfully complete the shooting, and even insisted on working for 6 days without closing her eyes.
In addition to desperately filming, she has never been left behind in her studies. In 2001, Ariel Lin was admitted to the Korean Department of National Chengchi University with excellent results. In order not to delay her studies, she never easily asked for leave, insisted on attending classes during the day, filming at night, and successfully graduated with excellent graduates under the condition of physical overload.
However, a long period of physical overdraft also made her overworked, at the age of 27, Ariel Lin was found to have a pituitary tumor and must be operated on as soon as possible, otherwise her vision will be affected and she may be infertile.
Because of the fear of accidents during the operation, Ariel Lin wrote a suicide note in advance, in which she confessed some unfinished things, and also said that she entered the filming industry because of her interest, so that her mother would not blame herself. Fortunately, the operation went very smoothly, and after a short rest period, Ariel Lin resumed work.
In 2014, Ariel Lin and her boyfriend Lin Yuchao married. After marriage, Ariel Lin gradually faded into circles, although she was still filming, but the number was very small, and it seemed that the focus of gravity had shifted to the family.
Since then, the evaluation of Ariel Lin's "humble" and "love brain" after marriage has never stopped.
Because of a photo of walking with her father-in-law, Ariel Lin was rumored by the media to be a humble daughter-in-law who "got up at 4 o'clock in the morning and waited for her in-laws", and netizens even used this as a paragraph to play with "Ariel Lin's schedule".
And because Ariel Lin revealed in the program group that she has tried many ways to prepare for pregnancy over the years, some people speculate that Ariel Lin has worked hard in the giants and needs children to stabilize her position, and even there are rumors of "eating frogs raw for pregnancy".
For a time, Ariel Lin became the representative of the "humble and rich daughter-in-law", and the major marketing numbers have issued articles of "advice", lamenting that the former idol drama queen fell into this step of the field, what is the purpose, is it not fragrant to come out and engage in career? There is quite a sense of mourning and angering between the words.
Just as the rumors were intensifying, Ariel Lin released a long Weibo "I am not humble, he is not scum", clarifying the rumors one by one:
Getting up early to make breakfast, serving the in-laws is false, the breakfast at home is generally done by the mother-in-law, and they occasionally lay hands on it, the so-called early rise is at most 7 o'clock, and they are good to the in-laws because they love themselves as daughters;
Husband dating young model, husband and wife feelings discord is false, even if separated from the two places, themselves and husband are often video, quite loving;
Eating frogs raw is even more nonsense, I have indeed tried many ways to prepare for pregnancy, but they are all based on the premise of scientific evidence, and the only thing that can be related to frogs is a milk tea called "frog laying eggs".
But even so, there are still people who do not believe it, and when she officially announced her pregnancy, yin and yang said strangely, "Congratulations, I can finally stand in the giants."
Ariel Lin's "mistake" is that she was born poor and married into a rich family, which was misinterpreted as attachment; everything she did for love and birth was understood as "consolidating her position". It alludes to the malicious speculation of women worshiping gold vanity and humility and seeking perfection.
And a girl's self-realization spirit of hard work for the life she wants, has goals and actions, and finally reaps the fruits, but is selectively ignored.
Internet celebrity Papi Sauce has also suffered a spurious online violence because of marriage and childbirth problems.
In May last year, Papi Sauce, who had just become a mother, posted a photo of herself holding her child on Weibo, lamenting that it was not easy to be a mother and wishing the world a happy mother's day.
Some netizens said that "Papi sauce is so tired after giving birth to a child, but the child still follows the father's surname", and subsequently, some netizens criticized Papi sauce's behavior of "giving up the right to crown the surname and collapsing independent female people".
In the afternoon of the same day, Papi Sauce topped a video titled "How to Talk Without Being Provoked", as if in response to the "prickly demon" on the Internet.
However, this response did not stop the spread of malice, and some netizens further devalued married women who did not let their children follow their mother's surnames, led by Papi sauce, as "married donkeys" and "fetal organs".
Among the various scoldings, one of the most convincing comments is that letting children follow their father's surname violates the character of Papi sauce that has always been a "modern emerging woman", setting a bad example for girls.
Their logic seems to be that having children follow their paternal surname is a compromise on traditional patriarchy by women. The purpose of fighting for the "right to the title" is to fight against the traditional patriarchy, otherwise it is to promote the arrogance of the patriarchal society and be a traitor to women.
First of all, from a historical point of view, the main function of the "surname" is to distinguish between blood relations, the system of "from the husband to the father's surname" is to ensure that men and women with blood relations in the same clan will not marry and have children, and for individual "rich" families, the man must "live from his wife", and his descendants must "follow the mother's surname", the purpose is also to maintain the existing organizational structure and order of the single-surname village.
Looking at the current environment, although it is undeniable that the right to crown the surname will still be regarded by many men as the right to have, in fact, the law does not favor men. The Marriage Law clearly stipulates that children may follow their father's surname or their mother's surname.
Critics have not thought deeply about the complex historical and cultural origins behind the surname, nor do they want to understand the concerns that women may have when exercising the "right to crown the surname", but simply and rudely bind the "father's surname" with the "male power" to judge whether the woman in the marriage relationship is "independent", which is not logically valid, but more of an emotional catharsis.
As a right, the key to the right to crown the surname is not the result of "whose surname the child is with", but the "optional" of the process. The essence of feminism is also that women can have more choices and become more free.
And when the "independent woman" label finally becomes a shackle that binds women, is the word "independent" advocated still its original intention?
In fact, even women who put all their energy into their work are still likely to be attacked, and they are often perceived as competitive and difficult to marry.
In "Love Apartment", Hu Yifei was admitted to the doctorate, but he did not dare to make it public because he was afraid of ridicule.
Subsequently, Zeng Xiaoxian, who knew about this, commented that "innately coupled with acquired efforts, Yifei is charging towards the highest realm of infertility" and "There are three kinds of people in this world, men, women, female doctors, female doctors are fighters in human beings, covered with multiple layers of aura, doubling the harm to all men."
In the play, other people's reactions to this matter are also mixed, and they all seem to acquiesce to Zeng Xiaoxian's words - sharp women are crushing men and should not be.
In real life, the female doctoral group has long been ridiculed and ridiculed countless times by the whole society because of topics such as gender, age, ability, marriage and love.
Writer Zhang Chun said: "In the field of public opinion of the culture and civilization in which we are located, there is a force that is hunting women who have developed a sense of subjectivity. ”
Faced with the dilemma that "women can't live right no matter how they live", Zhang Chun uses the concept of "double bondage" in psychology to explain it:
It means that the same thing is judged by two logics, so that in the end what you do is wrong. In life, women are often in such a "double bondage".
She also admitted, "Society also has constraints on men, but the constraints on men are more one-way, such as if you want to be rich, you can get as rich as possible; but the constraint on women is that you have to be rich, and you can't be too rich." ”
So, how should women break such a shackle? Zhang Chun said that the method is - I will not play your game with you.
No one can define the value of your life, and for people who have always been clear about what they want, the choices they make are the efforts they make for self-actualization out of their free will at some point in their lives.
Ariel Lin said on Weibo: "Not marrying or not having children is a choice; if you want to form your own family and conceive the next generation, it is also a choice, focusing on the decisions you make, rather than succumbing to the demands of others and the general trend of society." I understand this and can bear all the consequences of my choices. ”
Whether it is Guo Jingjing, who reappeared in the Olympic Games with a new role after marrying Huo Qigang, or Ariel Lin and Papi Sauce, who focused on the family after marriage, or Rainie Yang, who still strives to engage in career after marriage, shoots advertisements and sends new songs, there is no absolute right or wrong in each way of living.
Because "how to live" is a permanent, fluid proposition, and there is no standard answer to this proposition.
You have your opinion, I have my way of living.
Zhang Chun said: "The goal of living is to enable people to cope with the outside world and build an internal order according to their own preferences. In this way, there are bound to be thousands of ways to live. There are as many people as there are ways to live. Because no rule is made for me, only my rules are made for me. ”
Today is Ariel Lin's 39th birthday, I wish her a happy birthday, and I also wish all women brave to bloom and live freely.