Why is it that in love, it is often men who leave the scene first?
In today's fast-paced era, we often brush a lot of couples who show love on traffic platforms such as Douyin, Kuaishou, and b station. Their love can not be described as sweet, often let netizens envious, shouted: "More dog food, support me!" ”
But no matter how sweet their love is, they can't escape the end of a marriage and a relationship that breaks down quickly. Even many couples who have been up to 8 years and 10 years have not yet stepped into the palace of marriage and have declared the breakdown of their relationship. And in these broken feelings, it is often the man who chooses to quit first.
This makes many women hesitate in the face of love and marriage: do they get a license to marry early and tie their lovers to their side with a marriage contract? Or do you investigate slowly and use your youth to determine if the other person is the right person?
Either way, it's a big gamble for women. So in order to increase their chips, love, marriage and money are linked. But even so, in today's society, the divorce rate is still high, even climbing year by year. So, how exactly can you determine if the other person is someone you can be with for a lifetime?
Today, we will talk about what are the characteristics of men who can accompany you for a lifetime?
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="15" >, inclusive, making the partnership more intimate</h1>
In the book "Men from Mars, Women from Venus", it is said that women are accustomed to using language to express emotions, while men use language to convey information. The feelings between men and women are inherently different.
When we are wronged, or feel the indifference of our partners, we will uncontrollably blame and complain about our partners, which is an emotional catharsis. Often it doesn't make much sense, just wanting your partner to focus on themselves and give them comfort. But men often have a hard time understanding our emotions, and therefore it's hard to learn to be inclusive.
Men who truly love you will look for solutions and try to understand our emotions. Therefore, whether a man is tolerant is the primary basis for measuring whether a relationship can be maintained.
Si Si is a particularly insecure girl, and a word from her boyfriend, a move, may make her think about whether her boyfriend does not like herself. As a result, she often gets angry and complains about a small matter.
Once, while shopping, Sisi was thirsty and asked her boyfriend to buy him a drink. The boyfriend quickly bought back a cup of hot milk tea for her, but Si Si was not happy, complaining to the boyfriend: "How many times have I said that I like to drink ice lemonade, you don't like me at all, don't pay attention to it at all." ”
The boyfriend touched Sisi's head and said, "You're coming to auntie, you can't drink cold, good." A sentence made Si Si lower his head, embarrassed. And it is the boyfriend's tolerance that also makes SiSi realize his problems little by little, and he has begun to learn to calm down and think, and he has also learned to tolerate. Their relationship became more and more intimate, and eventually entered the palace of marriage.
Turgenev said, "Those who will not tolerate others are not worthy of being tolerated by others." "People, born without perfection, no one dares to guarantee that they will not make mistakes in their lives, so tolerance is what each of us should learn, mutual tolerance, will make people more close to each other."
Just like men and women in love, one party must first learn to tolerate in order to make the relationship more intimate. Women are naturally emotional, so a man who knows how to be inclusive is the first condition for a partner to accompany him for a lifetime.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="12" > respect, make the partnership more harmonious</h1>
Respect is the basis for building equal relations. A man who knows how to respect women can understand the difficulties and bitterness hidden behind women's smiles, and can see the talent and ambition under the gorgeous appearance of women. Therefore, he will cherish the partnership between each other more and make it more harmonious to get along.
The love between the famous literary artist Liang Shiqiu and the "singer queen" Han Jingqing was once a sensation, and their relatives and friends, including all the media and the public, and even Liang Shiqiu's students were not optimistic about this yearless love. But their collective protest did not shake the couple's determination to be together, but made their feelings stronger.
People think that Han Jingqing made the means to confuse Liang Shiqiu, but they did not know that this love began with Liang Shiqiu's unremitting pursuit. In the turbulent years of that person's impetuous heart, Han Jingqing was not as vain as other singers, she not only wrote and arranged songs herself, but also read many Classics of Traditional Chinese Studies such as "Book of Poetry" and "Chinese", and it was her lack of arrogance and impatience that attracted Liang Shiqiu.
It is precisely because of this appreciation that Liang Shiqiu is full of respect for Han Jingqing and does not look down on her because she is young. After marriage, Liang Shiqiu has the health habits of the elderly, going to bed early and getting up early, going to bed at 9 o'clock every night, and getting up on time at 5 o'clock in the morning; while Han Jingqing is accustomed to going to bed late and getting up late because of work relations.
Liang Shiqiu did not force Han Jingqing to change his work and rest habits because of the reason of "being good for you". Every morning, when he got up, he would go out for a walk alone, eat breakfast, and then wait until Han Jingqing was almost up, and then bring Han Jingqing a breakfast back. It was his respect that also made Han Jingqing learn to respect him.
She would quiet down after he had gone to bed early, read quietly, and make a living appointment with friends to hang out. The time between two people is always very harmonious, and there is never a contradiction due to different living habits.
Schiller said: "Whoever does not respect others, others will not respect him." And a man who will respect his partner will naturally cherish his partner more, and he will be more able to get the respect and understanding of his partner, and the relationship between them will be more harmonious."
Therefore, respect is an important sign that a man can be with you for a lifetime.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" data-track="16" > third, mature, so that the partnership is more stable</h1>
The mention of "Ma Bao Man" makes women feel chilled and retreat, which shows that an immature man cannot maintain an intimate relationship at all. So what kind of man is mature?
A mature man does not equal old age or honest looks. True maturity is that even if you have a childish face and play like a child in front of you, it can still give you a sense of security. He can give up everything for you, selflessly for the sake of this family.
Just like Lee Seung-hyun to Qi Wei, although the outward Lee Seung-hyun is handsome and naïve, and often plays with his wife like a child in the show, it is only because he is full of love for his wife.
As a famous actor, singer and host, Lee Seung-hyun would have had a great future and could break into his own career, which is also what every man dreams of. But Lee Seung-hyun decisively gave up all the opportunities in his hands and did what all men are unwilling to do, nor do they have the courage to do: return to the family, be willing to be the man behind Qi Wei, and take care of the children alone.
It is Lee Seung-hyun's dedication that allows Qi Wei to go out and fight without scruples. Because she knows that no matter what she encounters, Lee Seung-hyun always stands by her side, silently supporting and accompanying herself.
Maturity means that a man has his own responsibilities, he is willing to take on the responsibility of a home for you, willing to give you a shoulder that can be relied on with confidence, so that no matter how much wind and rain you suffer outside, there is always a harbor that allows you to live in peace of mind waiting for you.
Li Ao said: "Mature men will not accompany you crazy, nor will they accompany you to silence. He just shows up when you need it and disappears when you hate it. Marrying a mature man is equivalent to buying an insurance policy. "He will always give you the security you need most when you are helpless and make your marriage more stable."
Therefore, mature men can make your marriage more stable and accompany you for a long time.
A man who is good at inclusion, so that the partner can feel the happiness of being loved more;
A man who knows how to respect, so that the partner knows how to cherish the person in front of him;
A truly mature man who makes his partner more aware of the meaning of home.
May we all find the mature man who is willing to tolerate you and respect you, stay with you for a lifetime, and stay together until you are old.