Today I killed myself, I am free, I can fly with the wind, there is no restraint, I do not have to tiptoe to the pharmacy to buy melatonin and fluoxetine, I no longer have to be afraid of the night approaching, I no longer have to be afraid of the end of the day, I do not have to be afraid of panic all day, I do not have to listen to others say "temperament" to me, this is a monologue from a depressed person.
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Do you know this person? Sharp-eyed friends know that Ma Sichun, who has faded out of the screen in recent years, has returned, and in the past two years, Ma Sichun has given people the feeling of either being a lot fatter, or having a bad spirit, and relying on assistants to support him. People who don't know think she's arrogant, unsatisfied, and thinking too much, but in fact she really has depression.
In the video, Ma Sichun's zero lines play the inner monologues of depressed patients, who are often said, as for? You have to jump off the building at every turn, who has little pressure this year, it is a harsh self-talk such as temperament.
Ma Sichun blew herself up since she was a child, and she was indoctrinated with some "you have to be obedient, to be sensible, to let others, not to add trouble to others, causing her to be cautious in everything she does, afraid of others being sad, afraid of others getting angry, afraid that others will not like her."
It is even more frank that her depression is also related to her first love, Ma Sichun's first love is that she carefully chased for three years, calling herself a love brain and has been flattering. My former hospital was a mental hospital, during this period I came into contact with a patient, she has been ill for 10 years, now 37, the reason is her ambiguous object, that will be she is still young, taciturn she will receive a unit every day a boy to send her breakfast, but also from time to time will smile at her, and often ask her to dinner, but such a day lasted for a year without further, until one day the boy sent a wedding invitation, for a character who is already introverted she can not accept, collapse, During that time, she often had suicidal thoughts, her mood was very low, and her appetite was reduced, she was depressed all day, and her family's incomprehension intensified, and finally became a scoff, and later diagnosed with moderate depression by the hospital.
The picture is from the Little Red Book, and I hope you will never know this medicine
Xue Zhiqian also said that he had a very serious depression, belongs to a more serious patient, he once took three sleeping pills at a time when he was at his worst, and one day when he really couldn't sleep, he called his father and said that he was going to jump off the building, just that night his father gave him three sleeping pills after the whole person was dizzy, that is, although he fell asleep, but did not fall asleep at all, but did play a peaceful role,
Statistics show that every 40 seconds, somewhere in the world there will be depression and choose suicide, in the face of this psychological disease, our society, but always associate them with vulnerable, irresponsible and other words, so that many depressed people dare not disclose their illness, and finally let depression eat their lives.
So people who are accustomed to online violence, please give them a ray of sunshine, be tolerant of the world, may have nothing to do with you, but you may become salvation.