Adler, whose full name was Alfred Adler, was a well-known Austrian psychologist, psychoanalyst and social educator, as well as a pioneer of individual psychology.
He himself had a congenital disability and could not walk until he was 4 years old. In the face of other normal children, he must have some inferiority, so his childhood was not happy. However, the disability did not knock down Adler, but made him burst out of the perseverance beyond ordinary people. The more disabled he became, the more he had to prove to others that "I am not worse than others", so Adler instead created a great name. In particular, the theory of "inferiority and transcendence" proposed by him still occupies an important position in the field of psychology.
I've read Adler's book last year, and it can be said that I have benefited a lot, allowing me to see our world from a new perspective, looking at the growth of children, and I also strongly recommend that everyone read it. Not only to educate children, but also to enlighten their own lives.
#pgc-card .pgc-card-href { text-decoration: none; outline: none; display: block; width: 100%; height: 100%; } #pgc-card .pgc-card-href:hover { text-decoration: none; } /*pc 样式*/ .pgc-card { box-sizing: border-box; height: 164px; border: 1px solid #e8e8e8; position: relative; padding: 20px 94px 12px 180px; overflow: hidden; } .pgc-card::after { content: " "; display: block; border-left: 1px solid #e8e8e8; height: 120px; position: absolute; right: 76px; top: 20px; } .pgc-cover { position: absolute; width: 162px; height: 162px; top: 0; left: 0; background-size: cover; } .pgc-content { overflow: hidden; position: relative; top: 50%; -webkit-transform: translateY(-50%); transform: translateY(-50%); } .pgc-content-title { font-size: 18px; color: #222; line-height: 1; font-weight: bold; overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap; } .pgc-content-desc { font-size: 14px; color: #444; overflow: hidden; text-overflow: ellipsis; padding-top: 9px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 1.2em; display: -webkit-inline-box; -webkit-line-clamp: 2; -webkit-box-orient: vertical; } .pgc-content-price { font-size: 22px; color: #f85959; padding-top: 18px; line-height: 1em; } .pgc-card-buy { width: 75px; position: absolute; right: 0; top: 50px; color: #406599; font-size: 14px; text-align: center; } .pgc-buy-text { padding-top: 10px; } .pgc-icon-buy { height: 23px; width: 20px; display: inline-block; background: url(https://lf6-cdn-tos.bytescm.com/obj/cdn-static-resource/pgc/v2/pgc_tpl/static/image/commodity_buy_f2b4d1a.png); }
Adler, inferiority & beyond ¥39.9 purchase
From last year to this year, I have read a lot of books and learned a lot of other theories, and recently I have been looking at Adler's works, and I can't help but have new thoughts and views on his theories, so I want to share them with you.
<h1>Adler's theory</h1>
Adler put forward many conceptual theories, but in my opinion, the following 3 are the essence of Adler's theory:
1. Individual unity
Adler believed that the behavior of individuals was induced and directed by the unified personality of individuals. All expressions of the individual are consistent with each other and are a process of continuous development without sudden jumps in time.
I strongly agree with Adler's theory that we will show a unified self, both in space and time.
"Micro-expression" I believe many people have heard of, he actually reflects the unity. When we have a certain attitude in our hearts, although we will pretend on the surface, the subtleties of our actions, actions and other subtle places will reflect our true feelings, which is unity.
Not only that, but we will also show unity in a wide range of space and time. A child who has a nasty attitude towards learning, he not only hates in class, but he also hates when he comes home; he doesn't just hate today, he still hates tomorrow the day after tomorrow; he not only hates learning, but he also hates learning-related things, such as reading and homework. This is the unity of our individuals on a broad scale.
The unity of the individual is caused by the subjective cognition of the individual. Although our world is the same, the subjective perceptions we generate are different. In the same environment, diametrically opposed perceptions may arise. For example, if the same teacher asks questions, some students will think that the teacher wants to embarrass him, while others will think that the teacher values him.
Therefore, although people live in the same environment, we will produce unique cognitions according to our own cognition, which also makes the cognition consistent before and after, which is the reason for the unity of individuals.
So what does this teach us to teach our children?
If we understand individual unity and look at the child's bad behavior, we will know that simply correcting the child's mistakes will not work. Because if the child's behavior is caused by individual unity, then without changing the child's original cognition, the behavior is doomed to not be completely changed. For example, if the child has an averse attitude towards learning, the parents emphasize the importance of learning, and supervise and force the child to learn every day, which cannot change the child's original cognition of learning, and is doomed to fundamentally solve the problem of the child's learning is not active.
2, inferiority complex - the pursuit of excellence
All children have an innate sense of inferiority that stimulates their imagination and tries to eliminate them by improving their environment – Adler.
Adler believes that people have a natural inferiority complex, and it is precisely because of inferiority that they pursue excellence, and all the actions of individuals are aimed at pursuing excellence. Obviously, Adler's theory of inferiority is closely related to his painful childhood experiences.
I don't think I agree with Adler's inferiority complex, I don't think that inferiority is innate, because inferiority leads to the pursuit of excellence, on the contrary, I think it is the pursuit of excellence that is unattainable leads to inferiority. The inferiority complex and the pursuit of excellence, to put it bluntly, is the question of "chicken or egg first".
Whether it is inferiority or excellence first, it is an undeniable fact: people have a positive internal motivation to work hard. If individual unity regulates the course of the human heart, then the pursuit of excellence points the way to this process.
The pursuit of excellence is a fundamental attribute of all the animals and plants in our world, because if we want to adapt to this world and defeat our kind, we must constantly improve our abilities. Therefore, the pursuit of excellence is an inevitability, and no one is willing to degenerate.
At this point, some people may refute it: How come there is no self-indulgence? Those who are unwilling to learn, always addicted to games, fights and fights, are not willing to degenerate? This involves the psychological compensation that we will mention next.
3. Psychological compensation
The psychological compensation mechanism is a great discovery that can explain almost any of our irrational behavior.
As mentioned above, although children know the importance of learning, why do many children just smoke and drink and play games instead of learning? Isn't this inconsistent with the psychological mechanism of excellence?
In fact, the children's self-willed degeneration on the surface is actually a manifestation of the pursuit of excellence, and behind this problem is actually the psychological compensation mechanism of people playing a role.
Overcoming difficulties and pursuing excellence is certainly the best way to solve problems. But not all problems can be solved, and when the problem can not be solved, we will have psychological disorders, in order to avoid this obstacle to cause psychological stress, threaten our individual health, so we have psychological compensation.
For poor students, their poor learning is also an objective fact, it is reasonable to say that learning is important, they should study hard and achieve good results, but they can not achieve good results now, the only objective explanation is that intelligence is not good or not working hard. Either of these two explanations is a bad evaluation that will make the child anxious and self-denying. Then in order to eliminate this anxiety, the child will develop a psychological compensation mechanism, begin to avoid learning, and belittle the importance of learning. Learning is not important, of course, there is no need to work hard, do not work hard, of course, the grades are not good, and it has nothing to do with intelligence. As a result, the child loses the initiative to learn. But children still have the internal motivation to pursue excellence, and since this sense of excellence cannot be obtained from learning, they will turn to other aspects, such as smoking, drinking and playing games, these maverick behavior proves that they are better than other ordinary students, and of course, they have achieved their goal of pursuing excellence.
It can be said that in people's lives, psychological compensation mechanisms are everywhere. We often say that the A Q spirit, as well as the show off wealth in life, the trolls on the Internet, in fact, behind the psychological compensation mechanism is playing a role.
Psychological compensation is produced in the case of failure to solve the problem, in fact, it is a kind of self-deception behavior, the purpose is to make us feel better in our hearts, and thus ensure the health of the individual.
Knowing this, we can understand a lot of children's behavior.
Why do parents let their children write homework and children cope with parents? In fact, the psychological compensation mechanism is at work: even if I write, I am casually coping with writing, writing badly, so that parents are not comfortable. Parents are uncomfortable, and the child's heart feels comfortable.
<h1>summary</h1>
Understanding these concepts of individual unity, inferiority and the pursuit of excellence and psychological compensation, we can easily understand the psychological motivation behind the child's behavior, so that we can better solve the child's problem from the essence, rather than staying on the surface of headache and foot pain. Therefore, I suggest that every parent should read Adler's Inferiority and Transcendence.