Hello, I'm Li Haiyang.
Yang Ying expressed her own concept in "Sorry, I Don't Need a Boyfriend", which was widely praised.
Because from it we see the state of life that she enjoys freely, not helplessness or frustration, nor feminism or chicken blood.
I actually really like her state of detachment from worldly ideas, she really doesn't pay much attention to these things, whether there is or not, it does not affect her to live her life seriously.
I, on the other hand, am just a worldly person, inevitably falling into the cliché, or hope that someone will accompany her, and the two of them will live a happy and doubly happy life together.
Same as me.
Hahaha, I can't imagine it, this wave of dog food is waiting here.
Recently I was a little tired of writing, Yang Ying said "the topic is not enough, the husband to make up", let me tell you how my husband and I deal with the differences in life.
My answer is that in more than ten years of common life, we have rarely disagreed, from the beginning of love, we can always think of going together, just like the beginning, while liking each other, but also like each other.
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I have told the story of my husband and me in the article "Grateful to Meet the Destined Man" before.
I wrote in the article that you can eat together and watch movies together to live a lifetime, and there are currently two such people, one is Yang Ying, and the other is my husband.
I enjoy watching comedy movies, especially romantic comedies.
In my memory, the first movie I watched alone with my husband was called "Unconsciously In Love with You", and the heroine was Meg Ryan, whom I particularly liked.
Later, we watched another movie in which she starred, and there was "Uncle Wolf" Hugh Jackman, who was still a little fresh meat at that time.
The movie is particularly funny, probably a man and a woman were dumped by their other half, and the two people who dumped the two of them became a couple. The two of them met by chance because they followed their former boyfriend (girlfriend) and spied on the couple's life together. But later, the two of them exchanged feelings for each other in the day and night and understanding each other, and finally put down the frontier and lived a happy life together.
It wasn't seen in a movie theater at the time, because it was a movie from several years ago, and it wasn't shown in a movie theater.
In the borrowed house, the two of us watched the computer that Yang Ying left for us, and bought potato chips, hawthorn slices, melon seeds, and drinks in order to watch movies. When you are tired of sitting and watching, you will lean in and watch.
Probably because watching movies was such a habit in the beginning, that we both still like to hide at home and watch movies, prepare a lot of good food, and lie down to watch when we are tired.
Although I often can't remember the movies I have seen, my husband never dislikes me, will tell me about the scene of watching the movie at that time, and will accompany me to watch it again.
Sometimes when I comment or find it funny, he will say, you saw this last time you said the same thing, and the same is the place to laugh.
Even if we don't go out for leisure and entertainment and watch movies, the two of us are especially happy to stay together.
My husband is a particularly interesting man, like the encyclopedia, astronomical geography, history, military philosophy, and few things he does not know. He likes to talk, I like to listen, listen to him tell me, listen to knowledge as much as I listen to stories.
Although he had already spoken about some of them, I couldn't remember them, but instead of getting angry, he would shoot me on the head, call me stupid, and tell me again.
So much so that sometimes I would laugh at him, or sleep soundly listening to his voice.
Overall, I have always admired my husband, he is smart, funny, quick to react, can catch any stem, any difficulty can be resolved.
When I was with him, everything seemed to go well, and even if it didn't go well, it would be quickly forgotten and covered by other happy things. So much so that I always felt that the two of us were particularly lucky.
In life, he is my good partner, and in my career, he is also the person who supports me the most.
He knows that I am always unconfident and will always affirm me, even if I only have a little achievement.
Once in a closed training, he sent me to the school, specifically told my tutor that the grade is not important, the most important thing is to do a good job in my psychological construction, must let me build self-confidence.
Whenever I had to make any choice, he would say, go, husband believes in you, you will be running from now on. Whatever I choose, he listens carefully to my ideas and helps me analyze them, but he never decides for me.
We have always maintained good communication between us.
Before, we worked relatively closely together, and we would discuss work together, or talk about ideas about certain things and opinions about certain people.
Later, when I worked as a lawyer, he would also analyze the problem from my point of view, and when he saw problems that might be related to my work, he would prompt me in time, or discuss better ways of working with me, and from time to time praise me for making progress again.
My parents came to see me occasionally, and they all thought my husband was clingy, chatting with me non-stop since he came home from work, and didn't know how he had so much to say.
I haven't told them that this kind of communication is already a topic outside of our three phone calls in the morning, middle and evening.
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The question about eating is even simpler. After my husband and I were together, there was a big change in diet.
He said that no matter whether he ate or not, no matter how much he ate or how little he ate, if there was no meat, it was as if he had not eaten.
However, in order to have a balanced diet, I will at least guarantee one meat and one vegetarian diet, and my husband will also start eating vegetables. He would first pick up the vegetables and finish eating them, leaving only the meat to eat happily.
Whenever this time, for the vegetables I added to him, he always ate them with a look of grievance and helplessness, and then discussed with me whether he could give him another vegetable.
I would tell him that you are a growing little sprout that needs vegetables to thrive.
I love to cook, often develop new dishes or make strange things, my husband is always very impressed, as if he has never seen it, give me a lot of encouragement and support.
Even if he sometimes misses the dark dish, he will finish eating it and try to praise me for picking the best.
Later, after we worked out together, we would divide meals, meat, vegetables and staple foods were rationed, one plate per person, and reduced the intake of salt and sugar, he not only gradually accepted such a diet, but also loved the original taste of food.
Speaking of fitness, we also go together. In the beginning, we had classes together, formed a team, and the coaches liked to take the two of us crazy to play together, and arranged a lot of exercise programs for the two of us to cooperate with.
Later we changed to a gym that was closer to his unit.
I am more independent, even if I am not supervised by my coach, I can arrange my own classes for exercise. But I didn't have the ability to mentor and protect my husband, so I let him continue to teach with the new coach.
After the pandemic, I hadn't been exercising for a long time, my fitness card expired, and I didn't want to renew it because I was so far from home.
Later, when I saw that my husband didn't go much alone, I still renewed my card, exercised on time, and urged him to make an appointment with the coach and exercise well.
Because my husband and I are dependent on each other, I hope that we can both be healthy and happy to accompany each other until old age.
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For the question of children, we have considered it before.
Because neither of us particularly likes children, afraid of not being able to bring a good life to children, or unable to bear the responsibility for the future of children, so we delay again and again.
During my time at the Bar Association, my working hours were relatively loose, because the parents expected that we had taken this matter seriously, so we went to the hospital for examinations and prepared to have children in good health.
Later, my husband said that it was too painful to have children, he didn't want me to suffer this way, and neither of us had a strong desire to have children, and the end result was that we are still a family of two.
In fact, the children of my husband's colleagues, or the children of my brother's family, like to play with my husband, and my husband also has a set when he takes the children, and he still has some children.
Sometimes I wonder if it's because my selfishness has taken away some of his rights.
Fortunately, my husband hasn't thought so much, at least so far. I used to joke that I didn't have a man and a half woman, and he would comfort me by saying that it was our common will and choice.
He said that it was okay to play with the children occasionally, but after a long time, he was not sure that he had the patience to keep the children.
We now treat each other as children, and give each other a lot of cute nicknames, such as little peach, little melon, little gray rabbit, little dog and the like, sometimes what is on hand is called, always like two idiots laughing endlessly.
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In the past few years, the two of us would still have some unpleasant troubles, mainly because I was emotionally unstable, always complaining to my husband because of work or dissatisfaction with my situation.
He doesn't coax me, I want to do it, he coaxes me, I also make trouble. I even threatened my husband with divorce, in short, I had to be angry with myself.
My husband is a guy who admits mistakes very quickly. Every time I saw that I was not in the right mood, I began to admit my mistakes continuously. Sometimes they amuse me, and he has to apologize for things that have nothing to do with him.
I would ask him unreasonably, do you know what's wrong? The husband would look sincere and stare innocently into his eyes and say how he shouldn't do it.
Watching him talk nonsense in a serious way, I couldn't help but laugh, and he also cleverly sneaked downhill and immediately took me to eat good food, or show me something funny to distract me.
Later, I set myself the principle: don't bring home the emotions at work, don't bring the emotions of others to him.
After that, we rarely get upset or angry about small things.
My husband is a very romantic person, and he used to find a way to create some small surprises. For example, he would pay attention to buying me what he liked, and then quietly gave it to me, and promised me to take wedding photos and buy wedding rings every year, as long as it could be given to me, he never hesitated.
But then he knew that I was a practicalist, what flowers, cakes, jewelry, ah, did not appear much, all changed to big elbows, clothes, telephones and the like, now will arrange where to travel, take me a good picture or something.
Because of this, I often feel that I am confused, delaying my husband's romance, and also reducing his quality of life, and he is trapped in my water bottle as a Pisces.
Except for business trips, my husband and I are generally separated for no more than a day.
His unit would occasionally arrange for the night shift, and we would also arrange to have dinner together, one night apart, and see each other again the next day, never for more than twenty-four hours without seeing each other. The days of sticking together also seem to be not enough.
Speaking of my husband, I can't seem to stop.
In the future, I will have the opportunity to talk about our overtime, car purchase, house decoration, travel, and if I still want to know our story, I will arrange it.
Qian Zhongshu said that marriage is like a siege, people inside want to come out, people outside want to go in. However, for us, marriage is not something so clearly defined.
There is no essential change because of marriage, there is nothing to take for granted, if it is not the passage of time for marriage, in fact, do not feel that marriage has any impact on our lives.
If the best marriage is when two people trust each other, accompany each other, have something to say and do, I can understand you, you can understand me. I think I already have it.
*Author: Li Haiyang, lawyer, graduated from Jilin University Law School, Coordinates Changchun, currently engaged in corporate business and civil and commercial litigation business. Now he is committed to improving his lawyer's business, and at the same time writing articles that do not blow black, do not embarrass and do not thunder.