Schopenhauer once said:
"Happiness is nothing more than a temporary cessation of desire. We are like lambs in the field, rejoicing under the gaze of the butcher.
When you think about it, it is.
Life is not easy, everyone has their own sufferings, each has their own difficulties.
Happiness is like the sunshine in the cracks, rarely appearing.
Most of the time, we are inevitably entangled in all kinds of trivialities, helpless and unable to get out.
Although it is involuntary, it is not inevitable.
The four tragedies of life, the sooner you see them, the happier your life will be.
There is a saying in the "Theory of The Hidden Husband, Zhonggui": "If you can not claim his position, his suffering will be great." ”
In this world, everyone's abilities are limited.
If you blindly do things beyond your own ability, you will only bring unpredictable disasters.
My friend resigned from the company a few years ago and followed several high school classmates to do the sand and gravel business.
At that time, many people around him advised him to think carefully, after all, he had never been involved in this industry before.
But the friend is full of spirit, thinking that he knows enough, and the classmate has the so-called "relationship", which can be described as a winner.
Even if the start-up funds were insufficient, he ignored his wife's objections and invested all of his only home mortgage loans.
As a result, after only more than a year, it was required by the relevant departments to stop work and rectify due to environmental protection problems.
Suddenly, he had no money to repay the bank's loans, so he could only borrow online loans, and the debts he owed were snowballing.
In the end, not only was the house auctioned by the court, but the wife also filed for divorce, and there were various debt collection calls that bombarded every day.
At this time, the friend regretted it, but it was too late.
As the saying goes, "A bite can't make a fat person, and a hungry meal can't make a thin person." ”
It is a good thing to have a heart, but it must match its own strength.
Otherwise, no matter how ambitious, how deep the suffering will be.
More often, we need to dive into our hearts, do everything in front of us, and take every step of the way.
As Mo Yan said:
"When your talent can't support your ambition, you should calm down and learn;
When your ability is not yet able to control your goals, you should sink your heart and practice. ”
There are never shortcuts in life, only down-to-earth.
After walking the hardest road, it will be a smooth road in the future.
From childhood to adulthood, we are taught to be kind.
But do good deeds, don't ask about the future.
In fact, if the bottomless is good to people, it will only be yourself who will be hurt.
In the TV series "An Jia", there is such an infuriating scene:
Mr. Gong's grandfather was kind enough to take in a distant relative to live in his garden.
Not only did she help them build a room, install water, electricity, and furniture, but also did not collect rent, and paid for her two children to go to school.
This is more than forty years.
Later, the Gong family moved out of the garden, and considering that the relative did not have much savings, they generously lent them money to buy a new house.
Who knows, the family is not grateful, since moving away from the Gong family has disappeared without a trace, not to mention the matter of repaying the money.
Many years later, they accidentally heard that Mr. Gong was going to sell the old bungalow with an estimated value of 150 million yuan, and immediately dragged his family to come and share the money, and the mouth was 50 million.
The whole family also formulated a battle plan for this purpose, all kinds of throwing and rolling, messing around, and wanting to fight with the Gong family to the death.
Although this is only a TV series, this kind of "farmer and snake" story is not uncommon in life.
You are kind enough to help people hide secrets, and others turn around and stab you with a knife;
You save money and borrow money from your friends, but your friends spend money carelessly;
You are kind enough to help your colleagues solve problems, and the superiors are accountable for the convenience of throwing the pot to you.
There is an old saying that goes, "Compassion is a scourge, and it is convenient to be vulgar." ”
In this world, not everyone deserves our kindness, and not everyone deserves our tolerance and patience.
Kindness has a ruler, and tolerance has a degree.
Keep your distance from people who don't understand gratitude; cut ties with people who are inching forward.
Don't let bottomless kindness become a weapon for others to hurt us.
If the good intentions cannot be exchanged for good rewards, we must stop the loss in time.
Tu Lei once said: "The lover is full of seven points, and the remaining three points love himself." ”
In love or marriage, when we love others deeply into our bones, even more than we love ourselves, then we are not far from losing this relationship.
Last year, "the most beautiful little dragon girl" Li Ruotong wrote an autobiography "Good Life".
In the book, there is a passage like this:
"I've been through this state in a relationship.
After being with him, I have always maintained a habit of waiting until he comes home and starts preparing everything for him, no matter how late it is, so that the two of you can rest together.
While waiting for him, I fell asleep on the couch; in the bedroom I waited to fall asleep...
Here is the story of her and her rich businessman boyfriend Guo Yingquan.
Because she wanted to have a long-lasting love, she had easily put down her career in the sky, and she was fully engaged in ten years.
But where her boyfriend didn't like it, she obeyed her words, and gave up her former friends for this reason, changed her dressing style, eating habits, and even agreed not to marry or have children for a lifetime.
Even, when her boyfriend had an economic crisis, she did not give up and helped pay off debts.
However, in the end of unrelenting love, Li Ruotong did not get the treasure of her boyfriend, but waited for the end of the breakup.
Years later, looking back on this sad past, she was full of emotion:
"It is precisely because of this decade of stumbling that I have learned to love myself well, have the courage to come back, and live to become a relaxed and confident Li Ruotong in everyone's eyes."
It has been said that the essence of love is mutual attraction.
Because I love myself, I meet the beautiful you; because you love me, I meet a better self.
In love, enriching yourself is far more powerful than pleasing others.
Because, when you start to love yourself, the whole world will love you.
Ji Xianlin, a master of traditional Chinese studies, once said that the most regrettable thing in his life was to leave his hometown and leave his mother.
Because of his family's poverty, he went to study in a different place at the age of six.
During the period, he went home from the funeral twice, but he rushed back and forth and failed to get along well with his mother.
Once, when he came home, a neighbor told him that his mother regretted sending him out to study because he never saw him all year round.
Thinking of his mother's heartache, Ji Xianlin secretly vowed to work hard to get into college and take his mother to his side as soon as possible.
However, before the wish could be fulfilled, the mother left.
When he received the news of his critical illness, he rushed home day and night, only to receive two last words left by his mother:
"I knew you wouldn't come back when I went out, and I really regret letting you out."
"Over the past few years, I have been thinking about you day and night, and this kind of pain is unimaginable to you."
After Ji Xianlin listened, he was eager to crash into the coffin.
The greatest regret in the world is that the tree wants to be quiet and the wind is not stopping, and the son wants to raise and not to be kissed.
On weekdays, we always thought that our parents would always be alive and would always wait for us to come home for dinner.
Therefore, busy working, busy living, busy making friends, just did not take time to accompany parents.
However, time is not waiting for people, and parents always have a day to grow old.
Don't wait until your parents are sick to care; don't wait until your parents die before you regret it.
No matter how great the achievements, they cannot compensate for the debt to their parents; no amount of glory can make up for the regrets of their loved ones.
Take advantage of the fact that it is not too late, while the family is still there, love with your heart, and accompany you well.
Someone on the Internet asked: How can ordinary people who are not rich and wealthy live this life well?
A high praise replied: "Do your duty and obey the destiny." ”
Work steadily and give achievements to tomorrow;
Principled goodness, worthy of the conscience of heaven and earth;
Lovers love themselves first, let the feelings do as they please;
Do filial piety as soon as possible, and don't leave regrets in life.
I like a sentence that Mr. Lu Yao said:
"Life is always like this, we can't satisfy people everywhere, but we still have to live with enthusiasm."
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Author | A tanuki eats steamed buns, has a quiet appearance, a funny soul, and loves to be lively and lonely.
Image | Visual China