There are all kinds of misfortunes and frictions in married life, but it is still difficult to stop people outside the city from wanting to enter the city.
People outside the city see the security that marriage brings to people, a fixed partner, an emotional destination, a romantic wedding, and a promise from white head to old age.
But marriage is a huge net for people who want to escape the siege. A silent, ubiquitous web. This web is like the web of the spider spirit in Journey to the West, the more you break free, the tighter it is bound, and the more suffocated the people in the city.
Gu Xiaoying and her husband Guan Tong in "Paper Marriage" can be said to be happy with each other, voluntarily entering the marriage and giving love a home.
By marriage, the lives of two people change from one person to two people, becoming a family. With your other half of the house no longer empty, whenever you come home there is always a light on for you, and there is always someone waiting for you.
But the initial freshness of married life has passed, and people will feel tired and aggrieved.
Gu Xiaoying went from willingly washing his hands for Guan Tong at the beginning to making soup for Guan Tong, to his later grievances and complaints. The freshness has passed, and the dedication of the people has also decreased.
It is inevitable to complain, as an office worker, why did he enter the role immediately after marriage and start washing and cooking to take care of housework.
Why guan Tong's life has not changed in the slightest, as usual, overtime and late return.
So what does this marriage mean to you? Lower your own standard of living, wait for a man who does not know when to return, and do filial piety for the parents of the other party?
Gu Xiaoying was very confused, which was very different from the marriage she imagined. In the days after marriage, more often than not, she was alone, and Guan Tong was too busy to take care of her.
At first, Gu Xiaoying expressed understanding, but after a long time, it was inevitable that he would complain. This marriage has brought her only a difficult in-laws, the loneliness of an empty house alone, and the insecurity that is turning in her heart.
Before marriage, Gu Xiaoying lived in the school dormitory, sunny and happy, mingled with students, worked seriously, and made money on the side business.
After marriage, she moved out of her familiar school and moved into a government compound. Guan Tong was transferred because of his career choice. Every time he went home to greet Gu Xiaoying, it was a cold house.
A person is not angry on the day, and the meal is too lazy to cook. Sleeping alone at night can even feel scared. Gu Xiaoying had to check over and over again before going to bed whether the doors and windows were locked. All the actions revealed the insecurity in her heart.
Once people have enjoyed happiness and the sweetness of living together, it is difficult to return to the life that once seemed to be free from single aristocrats.
Returning to the once familiar campus accommodation again, Gu Xiaoying's state of mind has changed greatly. Even if she quarrels with Guan Tong and runs away from home, she knows that the school is no longer her home, the person she loves is not there, and she can't feel the warmth. In the middle of the night, she would miss Guan Tong's warm chest.
This is the change brought about by marriage, the sense of belonging and solidity in the heart.
Married life, Gu Xiaoying experienced explosive growth. The integration with the in-laws' living habits and the lack of smooth communication methods.
Guan Tong has been a double-sided glue, and because of work reasons, Gu Xiaoying has borne the pressure of life alone.
Those oaths were once beautiful, but in front of Gu Xiaoying were naked reality. Guan Tong's parents do not pay attention to hygiene living habits, poor habits of eating habits.
Guan Tong's mother would take the clothes to the kitchen sink to wash, she felt that it was convenient, and when she washed it, she threw it on the ground. Gu Xiaoying kindly reminded her mother-in-law not to throw unclean clothes on the ground, and the dishwashing pool could not be used to wash clothes.
The mother-in-law would only smile and say: Where the floor is dirty, it is much cleaner than the cement floor in their hometown. These unshaven living habits made Gu Xiaoying very helpless.
Pregnant Gu Xiaoying wants to eat meat, the in-laws have been saved all their lives, the so-called meat is to put some shredded meat when stir-frying.
This is their understanding of eating meat, and they can even give It to Gu Xiaoying to eat without eating it themselves. Gu Xiaoying could not say that her in-laws did not care for her and did not love herself.
It's just that their living habits have been very different. In Gu Xiaoying's view, reasonable expenses, the guild felt flesh pain. The same is the clothes, why buy so expensive.
He often taught Gu Xiaoying that it was not easy to save some money and make money. Gu Xiaoying's heart was suffocating, and she could only hold up her anger to vent to Guan Tong, because she could not communicate with her in-laws.
Although Guan Tong was helpless, he could understand Gu Xiaoying. Act as a mediator when Gu Xiaoying has a conflict with her parents. When Gu Xiaoying's behavior is reasonable, he will never wronged Gu Xiaoying.
Guan Tong's change began to surprise Gu Xiaoying. The family's major decisions, as long as Gu Xiaoying consulted with him, he felt that it was reasonable for the two of them to do it, no longer caring what his father said.
Guan Tong made his position clear, this is their own life. He struggled hard from the countryside to the city, not to change places to continue the backward lifestyle of the older generation.
He understands that change comes with throttles, but for the sake of his wife and children, he has to do it. The good life he understands, his parents do not understand, he can explain to them again and again, but will never compromise because of their attitude.
Their marriage is not only the growth of two people, but also the transformation of family talkers. The position of the steward father began to be replaced, and he changed to the side of learning.
It used to be him who led the family forward, and now Guan Tong and Gu Xiaoying are leading the family to a better life. They live together as a family, and there are often contradictions, but the theme of their lives will not change.
Live better for yourself and for future generations. They have different concepts and different levels of education, but because love is closely linked by responsibility. Because of Guan Tong's understanding and dedication, because of love, their married life is more and more harmonious.
Men must have their own position in married life, acting as a fire extinguisher, rather than a two-sided glue that is angry at both ends.
Many people have not experienced the happiness of marriage, and complain about the unhappiness of marriage because they chose to give up during the run-in stage. They can't stand the arguments that come with running-in, and they can't put themselves in each other's shoes.
They just want to calm the anger in the immediate future, regardless of future developments. Many times whether the marriage is happy or not is determined by the mentality of the parties, and whether the quarrel hurts the feelings or not also depends on the parties' handling methods.
Sometimes the other party wants nothing more than the understanding and heartache of the partner. Only love and respect will make marriage develop benignly, and will make people in the depths feel happy. Marriage is a practice, and it is not possible without either party.
#"Flash hour" theme essay issue 2 #