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Author: The Healing Girl
Original works, plagiarism must be investigated
01
Fan Shengmei's original family is the most topical in "Ode to Joy".
Many people say that Fan Shengmei's tragedy is a drag on the original family.
In fact, from another point of view, everyone overestimates the influence of the original family.
It is true that you will be influenced by your original family before you become an adult, but an adult should establish his own outlook on life.
Fan Shengmei is vain, has strong self-esteem, loves face, do you dare to say that this is given to her by the original family?
A person's original family is not the most sad, the sad thing is that you are addicted to it and cannot extricate yourself.
Fan Shengmei's original family is indeed very bad, her parents favor sons over daughters, and her brothers and sisters-in-law are also unclear people.
A large family had to rely on Fan Shengmei to support her, so that when she was 30 years old, all the money she earned was used to fill the family pit.
However, does Fan Shengmei really have no choice?
Why did her family exploit her over and over again?
Fan Shengmei is very smart, but she has made a serious mistake and lacks a sense of boundaries with her original family.
Wei Wei once said that Fan Shengmei escaped from the patriarchal family, and she also provided for her family, essentially showing her own sense of existence. This is not another kind of vanity.
It is this vanity that makes Fan Shengmei and the original family unable to be separated. Her parents, brothers and sisters-in-law, all have labor, but Fan Shengmei gives them money again and again.
As long as she cries a few more times, she can get money, and her already inert family will not eat her. Therefore, Fan Shengmei not only had to provide for them, but also helped her brother buy a house and repay the mortgage.
Her brother injured someone and needed a large amount of compensation, and she also wanted to find a way.
Fan Shengmei's compromise was exchanged for the family's progress. Human nature can not be indulged, Fan Shengmei is a senior HR, will not be unaware of this.
If she had been brave enough to say no when her parents first exploited her.
Parents really can't get money, and they won't let themselves starve to death. Another very strange point is that Fan Shengmei's parents and brother-in-law think she is very rich.
Why? It is not Fan Shengmei who has decorated herself as very rich.
If Fan Shengmei, like Qiu Yingying and Guan Ju'er, did not pursue those nihilistic things, she would not let the family's hand stretch out so long.
02
In the final analysis, Fan Shengmei's exploitation by her original family is inseparable from her own weakness.
She is a typical external strong middle cadre, in the face of her parents' crying, she is very tough on the surface, but in fact she can't bear it.
So, she tangled and twisted, and finally cleaned up all the mess.
Her family also ate this for her, so they cried and cried and said a few words, "I'm sorry for you."
Fan Shengmei's defenses were relaxed.
What is even more frightening is that Fan Shengmei wants to save her original family, and she has never thought of relying on herself, but on men.
At the time of her brother's accident, she had no money in her hands, and actually tried to give qu Lianjie a personal favor and gain benefits from him.
The practice of exchanging your body for money is ridiculous.
In the face of difficulties, people will lose their minds, but Fan Shengmei is the one who can save herself by pushing away with her own hands. At that time, Andy knew about Fan Shengmei's plight and offered to give her money.
However, Fan Shengmei's self-esteem did not allow it, and he also regarded Andy's kindness as a donkey's liver and lungs. Is sleeping together more noble than receiving help from friends? Most of the pain of Fan Shengmei's life comes from punching a swollen face and filling the fat.
Obviously, she is a, but she wants to disguise herself as Miss Qianjin, she is not tired herself, and everyone who watches it feels tired. Fan Shengmei's vanity and self-esteem are the murderers who push her into the abyss.
As for the bad original family, it was just a failure in her sparse life.
Fan Shengmei is not a child, they are 30 years old, and they have been kidnapped by their original families, which is too faceless for her family, and it is also a manifestation of her lack of determination.
In fact, a bad native family should not be an excuse to stop you from flying.
03
Fan Shengmei really should learn from Su Mingyu in "All Is Good". Su Mingyu can spread her wings and fly high and have her own life, largely because she knows how to cut off her original family.
When she was young, aware of her parents' preference for sons and daughters, she couldn't stand it, chose to break off relations with her family, and went out alone.
Years later, she had a career, a home and a car, and completely escaped from that sparse family.
In the face of her father's cowardice, her brother's selfishness and difficulties, she will help, but her posture is never pandering and flattering.
Her posture is beautiful, she is telling her family: Everything I have today is not yours, I am willing to help you is my business, if I am not willing to help you, you should not open your mouth.
With the attitude, the family also realized that they owed her a debt. Her father, Su Daqiang, encountered something and did not dare to take the initiative to ask Su Mingyu, because he had no face.
Moreover, Su Mingyu was absolutely unyielding in the face of her family's bullying. Once, she was beaten by Su Mingcheng and her nose was blue and her face was swollen, and she did not cry herself, but chose to call the police.
For the crime of domestic violence, Su Mingcheng could not escape. Later, the family and fate and intercession let Su Mingcheng go. Well, if you want to let him go, you have to apologize to me in person.
I have to say that Su Mingyu's approach is simply textbook-level. She never gives in, doesn't compromise, I treat you like family, you treat me as an enemy and a cash machine, sorry, you have to pay for your mistakes.
Such an approach seems cold-blooded, but it really draws a line with the family, and at the same time firmly controls the initiative in his own hands.
In fact, what Fan Shengmei lacks is such decisiveness and determination.
04
Looking at the role of Fan Shengmei, there is a feeling of hating iron not steel. She was obviously beautiful, smart, but she made a mess of her life.
Maybe you can use your original family to excuse her, but I really can't.
Her personality, no matter what kind of family she was born into, is difficult to have a happy life.
A woman who places her future on an illusory man is doomed to her end. Fan Shengmei's desire for a magnificent life is not wrong, the fault is that strength is not worthy of ambition.
Obviously full of enthusiasm, but not in the promotion of themselves, but in how to attract rich men. No wonder, she was deceived by a scumbag like Qu Lianjie.
After all, women don't be too greedy, when you are a sparrow, but try to fly up the branches to become a phoenix, it will be very miserable when you fall.
Adults should take responsibility for their own actions, not let the original family bear the blame.
I hope that Fan Shengmei will stop obsessing, want a better future, learn to cut with the original family, learn to accumulate strength, and firmly grasp the control of life in their own hands, which is the posture that women in the new era should have.
END.
Today's Topic:
Do you think Fan Shengmei's tragedy is only because of her original family?
Welcome to leave a message to discuss.
Yu Girl: Self-media veteran writer, focusing on the growth and emotions of women in the new era.
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