The Eiffel Tower in Paris is not only a symbol of romance, but also often ridiculed by literati.
Maupassant once jokingly said that the only way he could endure the Eiffel Tower was to eat in the restaurant under the tower, because that was the only place where he could not see it.
Like his rhetoric, Maupassant's work is also full of contradictions and irony.
The novel "The Necklace" is such a work that makes people sigh.
The protagonist of the story, Mathilde, has to work hard for ten years because of a lost necklace.
Eventually, she found out that the necklace turned out to be a fake!
But what is even more ironic than the fake necklace is her weak mentality, which pushes her step by step into the abyss.
The victim mentality, afraid to face the real self
In France in the second half of the 19th century, the Industrial Revolution had just ended, capitalism was booming, urbanization was accelerating, classes were increasingly divided, and wealth and status became the criteria for evaluating a person's value.
Mathilde, who was born beautiful, was born into a family of ordinary clerks and had to marry a small clerk in the Ministry of Education.
For this reason, she was immersed in misery all day long, and felt that she was born to enjoy luxury, rather than live in such a humble house, accompanied only by a maid.
She fantasizes about high-end life all the time:
Gorgeous goblots, precious antiques, fragrant living rooms, tall manservants, shiny silverware, and delicate sea bass......
Despite her husband's thoughtfulness, Mathilde saw him as an insignificant clerk who could not bring her the upper-class life she wanted.
One day, my husband happily brought back a rare invitation to the party.
However, in the face of this invitation, Mathilde's eyes were only anger, dissatisfaction and grievance.
She complained about not having clothes to wear out, and she was anxious about the shabby of not having jewelry.
Mathilde was so dissatisfied with her life, but she forgot that, in addition to her beauty, she also loved her husband, her middle-class status, and a maid who took care of the household for her.
But she turned a blind eye to all this, complained, and never thought of changing her mindset or making any effort.
And behind this complaint, she doesn't dare to accept her true self, she doesn't dare to face her class, wealth, and the emptiness and vanity in her heart.
She is afraid of the ordinary and ordinary, and she is afraid of being looked down upon by others.
These fears forced her to rely on external material things and the approval of others to find a sense of worth.
Many of us, perhaps, are like her: complaining about others, complaining about the world, as if fate was always against them.
Such a mentality often stems from an inner inferiority complex.
Driven by it, people are afraid to face their own shortcomings and admit the limitations of reality, so they choose to blame the outside world and avoid responsibility.
In the long run, complaining makes people's hearts gradually closed, and they are like a lonely boat on the sea, drifting with the current, never able to grasp their own direction.
The way to get out of this mindset is to admit who you are and accept the fact that you are not perfect.
Allow flowers to be flowers, trees to be trees, and allow yourself to be yourself.
Only when we are brave enough to face the fear and dissatisfaction in our hearts can we calmly get out of the predicament.
Face is paramount, there is no stable kernel
When Mathilde was distressed by the lack of jewelry to attend the party, her husband suggested that she wear a few roses as decorations.
But she refused at once, and she felt that there was nothing more humiliating than to appear among the broad ladies with such a poor and sour face.
Fortunately, she borrowed a beautiful diamond necklace from a wealthy girlfriend.
She took the necklace to the party.
That night, Mathilde was in all his glory, and she enjoyed the ball until four o'clock in the morning.
When leaving, in order to prevent others from seeing the coat that she couldn't handle, she ran out of the door in the cold.
Then she and her husband shuddered in the darkness of the night and found an old carriage along the Seine.
When they climbed the stairs home desolately, Mathilde was horrified to find that the borrowed necklace was missing!
All the exhaustion and coldness seemed to condense in the air, and Mathilde and her husband were at rock bottom, and the whole world collapsed in an instant with a strong sense of fear.
In a panic, they didn't tell their friends about the loss of the necklace.
Instead, he found a necklace that looked almost identical, but was extremely expensive, and returned it.
But the necklace was too expensive, and they broke the bank.
They had to lay off their maids, move to smaller houses, and go into huge debts.
In order to repay the money, they worked several jobs at the same time, and toiled for ten whole years, and finally paid off the bill.
Mathilde was afraid of being laughed at by the rich ladies, and afraid of being embarrassed by telling her friends the truth.
For the sake of these pitiful faces and the eyes of others, she exhausted her youth and money.
There are many people who do the same, often forcing themselves for the sake of face.
We may be in a good mood because of a compliment from someone else, or we may feel bitter because of a criticism from someone else.
If this is always the case, life becomes a game of chasing external evaluations, and the inner body becomes more and more empty.
This kind of person will eventually exhaust his inner strength because he does not have a strong kernel support.
Feng Tang said: "Do things first, face second." Put success in front of your own face. ”
No one is perfect, instead of worrying about "what if I do wrong", "what if I can't do it", "what if others criticize me", try to set small goals for yourself and take positive action.
It doesn't take much of a feat, but small things can help us build up our self-identity and find value from within.
He is strong by him, and the breeze blows on the hills. He is horizontal, and the bright moon shines on the river.
True strength comes from inner firmness.
When we are able to face external criticism or recognition, we will have true freedom and peace.
Thinking short-term and not paying attention to possible consequences in the future
When Mathilde borrowed jewelry, his friend was very generous and took out a large jewelry box and let him choose from it.
Not only that, but in the face of Mathilde's request to borrow a diamond necklace, his friend readily agreed.
Mathilde put her arms around her friend and kissed her excitedly, without any suspicion that she had lent such an expensive necklace, and her friend did not even hesitate or give her a warning.
From the moment they discovered that the necklace was missing, Mathilde and her husband were swept away by fear.
They seem unable to face the possible complaints or doubts of their friends, and they seem to be afraid that their friends know that they cannot afford such expensive items and do not deserve such a circle.
They chose to hide the truth and went to find a necklace that was almost identical.
Luckily, they quickly found the jeweler according to the font number printed on the necklace box, only to find that only the box was matched here, and the necklace was not.
They didn't arouse the slightest suspicion of this, and just continued to search for them from jewelry store to jeweler.
Finally, in a shop near the royal palace, they found it.
The price of nearly 40,000 francs allowed the husband to use up the inheritance left by his father, and he borrowed a lot of bad loans.
When Mathilde returned the necklace, the friend only complained that she should have returned it sooner and did not even open the box.
Mathilde is not only unsuspicious of this, but also has a right idea, she is afraid that her friends will find out that the necklace has been dropped and that she is a thief.
In order to pay off his debts, Mathilde did all the menial and clumsy work in the family for ten years, wearing ordinary clothes, arguing with people in the shop for a copper plate or two.
Mathilde's pathos isn't just about losing the necklace, or having to pay it back for ten years.
Instead, she and her husband did not think carefully about the possible consequences before making a decision.
Perhaps, this high-end dance party and fake necklace is beyond their daily experience.
But more likely, it's their usual short-term mindset that prevents them from seeing other possibilities:
If you had told your friends the truth, would the result be completely different?
Actions that lack thought can lead us further and further down the wrong path.
The key to changing your short-term thinking is to stay calm in the face of a problem, take a broader view, and consider the long-term impact of each decision.
To face the reality calmly and bravely take responsibility.
This is true wisdom.
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Mathilde in "The Necklace" is unable to face her true self because of her weak mentality, overly looking at the unexpected world, making short-sighted decisions, and finally going to the abyss of fate.
Read her story and it will be clear:
True strength does not lie in external wealth or status, but in our inner steadfastness and freedom.
In this challenging world, we may not be able to control all external circumstances, but we can choose how to face them.
Seek for oneself from within, not from the outside; Don't be in a hurry, don't be afraid, put down roots.
Even if we are in the midst of storms, we can be calm and determined.
Author | Shiman· Jingkan Shijiu, mother of two girls, 9 years of teaching experience in public famous schools, 4 years of experience in private innovative school management. She loves reading and writing, and pursues the depth and breadth of life.