Zhu Yuanzhang, the famous emperor in history, often gives us the impression of being deep, strong, and domineering, but today, what I want to tell you is not his great military exploits, but a small story about education, which not only makes people laugh, but also makes people think deeply
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The story is like this, Zhu Yuanzhang hired a teacher for his son, a well-known virtuous man, this scene is like our parents asking for a tutor for their children, when the teacher is in class, he is a little cautious, and wants to discuss the education policy with Lao Zhu, so he asked: "Your Highness, if you are not obedient, can you fight?" This sentence ignited the atmosphere at once
Many people may think, "This teacher dares to ask such a thing, is there something wrong with this head?" But it makes sense for the teacher to ask this question, after all, in that era, almost all parents used the concept of "don't fight for half a year, you are my baby" to teach their children, but, unexpectedly, Zhu Yuanzhang's answer was shocking: "You can fight, but you have to ask yourself first, why my baby is disobedient, is it that you haven't taught well!" This sentence not only reflects Lao Zhu's personal concept of education, but also deserves our modern parents' deep thought
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Zhu Yuanzhang's educational philosophy, in short: everything must reflect on oneself first, rather than blindly blaming children, we often hear those "beating to discipline" and the like, many parents think that their children make mistakes to be punished, which is undoubtedly a lack of patience and wisdom
In reality, many parents are angry when their children make mistakes, and they attack or punish them verbally as soon as they come up, as a result, not only are the children scared to tears, but even misunderstand the love of their parents. It's nothing more than letting them grow up in fear, and all they hide in their hearts is a heart of escape
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Zhu Yuanzhang can realize this problem, it is really very valuable, just imagine, if every child is teachable, then the responsibility of parents is naturally placed in front of them, parents must first know that as the guide of children, their words and deeds will imperceptibly affect the growth of children, if our words are always towards negative fermentation, children grow up in this atmosphere, it is inevitable to form inferiority, anxiety and other psychological problems
Let's take a look, today's practice of this Ming Taizu, does give us a lot of inspiration, he understands, to cultivate outstanding talents, power is not enough, but also moral, self-cultivation, children's education is to pay attention to guidance and communication, this is not to let children in a laissez-faire state, but to find out their personality and interests in the norms, encourage children to explore, cultivate their autonomy
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We can also learn an important truth from Lao Zhu, that is, education needs to be targeted, Zhu Yuanzhang asked the teacher not only to let his son learn to take the exam, but to hope that they can use knowledge to solve problems, and truly become useful talents for the country, the goal of educating children is not to let them get full marks in the exam, but to hope that they can use the knowledge they have learned flexibly and make wise choices in life and future work
For example, if your child shows a strong interest in drawing, then you can take them to art exhibitions and sign up for some painting classes to help them improve their painting skills and stimulate their creativity, rather than simply letting them do their homework and ignore their real hobbies and strengths
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Next, let's talk about some common problems in actual education, many parents will be anxious when educating their children, want to see their children grow up quickly, and even more, they will often use scolding or beating to try to stop their children's bad behavior, but we need to know that this method is not only ineffective, but may be counterproductive
Hitting children may make them "well-behaved" and obedient in a short period of time, but in the long run, children will not only become timid, but also lack courage and ability to deal with difficulties and setbacks in the future
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In family education, we have to remember the power of communication, many parents think that children are small and ignorant, so they don't need to reason with them, this idea is very dangerous, educate children, communication is an absolutely indispensable link, so that children understand the reasons for doing wrong things, rather than simply telling them what is wrong, so that knowledge and morality can be truly digested and absorbed
You may think that Zhu Yuanzhang's education method was good back then, and if today's parents want to follow this idea, they may encounter a bottleneck, because the times are different, and the changes in economic and cultural aspects have made education methods continue to evolve, and today's parents should also continue to update their educational concepts, learn more knowledge, and make our education more in line with the times
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We also have to pay attention to some phenomena in modern families, for example, more and more children are oppressed by too strict standards, resulting in excessive learning burden, psychological burden is also increasing, parents think that "high attention" is a good education, moderate pressure can promote the healthy growth of children, Zhu Yuanzhang's wisdom lies in the fact that he did not put too much pressure on children, but through guidance to improve their self-awareness, which is more helpful for children's growth
In Zhu Yuanzhang's era, education is not only the way of reading, children can also learn through practice and contact with society, which requires parents to take their children out to understand the world and absorb new ideas and information
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When we put aside violence education and return to love-centered education, we will find that the process of education is actually a mutually reinforcing learning process, children are growing, parents are also growing, and in the process of accompanying children to learn, we as parents will continue to reflect on and improve our own ways, learn to communicate better with children, and give them understanding and support
To sum up, Zhu Yuanzhang's education story inspires us, education is not only to impart knowledge, but also to cultivate children's ability to think independently and face problems bravely, as modern parents, we should learn excellent educational concepts, start from ourselves, and cultivate confident and brave children, and all this can not be achieved through violence and loud scolding, but requires the guidance of patience and wisdom, with the help of love and understanding, so that children can grow up healthy and happy
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In this process, parents should always remind themselves not to lose confidence, to believe in their children's potential, and through appropriate methods and strategies, so that children can discover themselves in exploration, grow in practice, and gradually build their own future
The road of education is long and challenging, but in any case, love and understanding are always the best guidance, as long as we can always take love as the starting point and patiently accompany children to grow up, I believe that they will be appropriate and blooming, so that every child can bloom their own beautiful flowers in their own world