There is a problem with high-achievement and high-cognitive groups, that is, they are not aware of the seriousness of psychological problems, and there will be an idealized state of people.
Compared with ordinary people, groups with high achievements and high cognition have relatively high mentalization ability, interpersonal relationships and psychological functions will be relatively sound, and life will be relatively free of so much trauma and psychological distress.
Therefore, in the relationship with each other, they will naturally have a favorable state of human nature, will have the characteristics of over-idealizing others, will feel that everyone in this world is kind-hearted, can understand people, and can change after realizing the problem.
This partial and comprehensive cognition is the fatal wound of the high-achieving cognitive population, and it is also their weakness that needs to be improved urgently.
Because of this thinking, they will have empathy for people with mental disorders such as NPD, and they will be overly sympathetic to their plight. For example, when NPD sold badly, he said: "I was always bullied, very unsatisfactory, and everyone treated me badly." ”
Groups with high cognition will sympathize with each other, will express discomfort with each other's suffering, and will also have a certain degree of empathy.
There is nothing wrong with empathy, it is normal, it can reflect the good heart of the individual, but there will also be a lack of clear sense of boundary behind it, and it is easy for emotions to be substituted by others.
Blindly believing what others say without being clear enough or without clear facts will suffer a big loss, and there may also be a risk of being manipulated.
NPD's relationship strategy has always been very fond of manipulation and control of the overall situation through public opinion. Once there is a setback, or the relationship breaks down, they will have a strong sense of revenge, and sometimes it is clear that they have done something wrong, and they will beat it up, framing and accusing the other party of being the fault of the other party.
What do they usually do in order to win public support? Selling misery is one thing, and on the other hand, it is exaggerating the facts themselves and then gaining sympathy from others.
This is one of the characteristics of the narcissistic personality disorder group.
Usually we watch the news and various reports, and we can often see this phenomenon. Husband and wife quarrel, just a few words, and then the partner makes a big noise, slandering the other party for beating him, bruising and purple, and there is domestic violence.
As a result, when I called the police to investigate, I found that this was not the case at all. Not only is there no violence, but it is pure slander, and some people are perpetrators in their feelings, and they will disguise themselves as victims to attract the attention of others.
And this is what the NPD community often does.
So this is why psychology emphasizes a concept of boundaries, that is, a sense of boundaries, interpersonal relationships need to maintain boundaries, don't interfere too much in other people's affairs, and try to pay attention to themselves, and this is the reason.
Relationships are too complicated, not everyone is as kind as you think, and they are a group with normal mental functioning.
People with mental disorders or psychological problems are very prone to interpersonal control, often distorting various facts to achieve the purpose of manipulation, and satisfying their own narcissistic needs by controlling others.
If you blindly listen to other people's words and indiscriminately believe what others say, you will also be fooled in the end, and you will also become a "flying monkey" controlled by the other party.
For high-achievers and high-cognitive groups, the most important thing in interpersonal relationships is to be aware of objectivity and to have a clear understanding of the differences between people. There are good people and good groups in the world, and there will also be bad people, groups with abnormal psychological abnormalities and not very healthy people.
When you meet someone who makes you uncomfortable or distressed, it will be greatly affected after a long period of contact, and the psychological and emotional aspects will also be disturbed.
Reach out to others, keep boundaries, and look at things around you calmly and calmly. Neither extreme, nor black and white, this kind of relationship handling is appropriate. If you look at the essence of the phenomenon and recognize the relationship, then you can avoid being manipulated by NPD in the future.