There is a saying that "by the trees, the trees will fall, by the people will run, and by the water, the water will flow." ”
In this world, no one else can rely on you except yourself. Especially for people, there is a huge uncertainty, and what was reliable yesterday may not be reliable today.
The reason why there is great uncertainty in human beings is because human nature is fickle.
There is a famous saying in "Black Ice": "Man is a pluralistic complex function, if you stand the test today, you may defect tomorrow, today you are allies in the same camp, and tomorrow you may become enemies on the battlefield." ”
It is very difficult to meet someone who can be trusted, and it is basically lower than the probability of winning the lottery ticket.
People are reliable, they can't be hidden. People who are really reliable have these obvious characteristics. Of course, there are very few people who meet these conditions.
1. Seeing the truth in adversity.
There are two sentences: "It's easy to put the icing on the cake, but it's hard to send charcoal in the snow." "The cold years know the pines and cypresses, and the adversity sees the truth."
When you have money, others flatter you and give you the icing on the cake, which is very easy to do. But if you're down, basically no one will pull you.
In winter, you will know that it is the strong pines and cypresses that will always remain green. is in a certain predicament, and only then does he know who is the person with real feelings.
For 99% of people, as they are in a difficult situation, they will only meet people who fall into the well, not people who are in the middle of the situation. Because it is difficult to do charcoal in the snow.
First of all, you are down-and-out and can't give others certain benefits, so why should others help you? Secondly, human nature is selfish, so why should others help you selflessly?
The higher the expectations, the greater the disappointment. Not to mention that outsiders can't see the truth in adversity, even husbands and wives will fly separately when disaster comes, and even children will have no filial children in front of the bed for a long time.
Second, the benefit is not moved.
At the end of the Ming Dynasty, there was a minister named Hong Chengchou, who was captured by the Qing army.
When he was in prison, someone came to talk to Hong Chengchou. Ask him, do you want to surrender? Hong Chengchou replied resolutely, I am a courtier of the Ming Dynasty, and I will definitely not surrender.
While speaking, Hong Chengchou found a speck of dust on his clothes, and hurriedly flicked it off with his hand. The person who talked to Hong Chengchou laughed and left quickly.
Afterwards, someone asked him, is Hong Chengchou going to surrender?
He replied that Hong Chengchou would definitely surrender. The reason is very simple, a person who has to pat off even a speck of dust on his clothes must pay attention to his own wings and future, how can he be willing to die?
Later, Hong Chengchou really surrendered. Although Hong Chengchou made great contributions to the Manchu Qing Dynasty, Kangxi still classified Hong Chengchou in "The Biography of the Second Minister" (a courtier with two hearts), thinking that Hong Chengchou forgot his righteousness when he saw profit, was not a loyal minister, was not a good thing, and was always unreliable.
3. Do things with conscience.
As long as the word "conscience" is mentioned, I believe that many people will cover their mouths and snicker, thinking that it is naïve to talk about conscience.
It can be seen that people nowadays do not attach much importance to conscience, thinking that money is supreme and conscience is worthless. This is destined to lead to more and more people doing things against their conscience.
Can a person who violates his conscience be reliable? It's definitely unreliable. Today, he can hurt others by any means, and tomorrow, others will be able to hurt you by any means.
The collapse of human nature is like a rolling stone on a high mountain, as long as it rolls, conscience is abandoned, it really can't stop. Single-mindedness is a luxury. Betrayal is the normal state of life.
Take the relationship between husband and wife, for example. Some men don't care how much their wives give, as long as they see their wives become yellow-faced women, they will abandon their wives. Some women don't care how much their husbands give, as long as they see that their husbands can't make money, they will go their separate ways with their husbands.
When conscience encounters practical difficulties, I think many people will abandon their conscience and find another way. When conscience is abandoned, there are very few people who are destined to be reliable.
Fourth, we must take a firm stance.
What kind of person is the most reliable? There is no doubt that those who stand firm are the most reliable.
People who do not have a firm stance are basically "wall-riding factions", that is, the so-called "wall-head grass", where the wind blows, they will fall. There is no principle, only "pursue the advantages and avoid the disadvantages".
People, no matter which side they are inclined towards, must have their own firm position. If you don't even have a position, it will basically change with the times, and your beliefs will be easily shaken.
Look at Wei Yan in "Romance of the Three Kingdoms", why was Zhuge Liang jealous as soon as he surrendered, and he still had the intention of cutting off Wei Yan?
Because Wei Yan sold the lord for glory. In order to welcome Liu Bei, Guan Yu and others into the city, he directly killed his boss Han Xuan without any hesitation. Today, Wei Yan can kill Han Xuan, and tomorrow, Wei Yan can also kill Liu Bei and Zhuge Liang.
Stance is such a thing, it's complicated, but it can't be without. People who don't have it generally can't be trusted, and it's very unreliable.
Text/Shushan has deer