"Murphy's Law": All depression is cured by self-healing
Introduction:
If you treat depression as a disease, the result is likely to be that you can't get rid of it, because depression is not a "disease" in essence, but a character defect, or a psychological deficit.
From the perspective of psychological growth, depression is just a warning to our mistakes and to learn to correct ourselves. This correction is to let go of perfectionism and learn to "love" and "accept". So in this sense, depression is not a cure, but a self-healing process of self-reconciliation.
Body:
During the consultation, one of the students with depression asked me this question, and he asked, "Teacher, why is it that my friend has depression and seems to have recovered without doing anything?" And I haven't come out for so long? ”
I asked, "Did you ask, why did he recover so quickly?" ”
He replied, "Yes, he said he went for a run every day, and then he was fine." ”
Me: "Did you run away?" ”
Him: "I also ran for a few months, which was a little useful, but it wasn't like he said, and I fully recovered. ”
Me: "Everyone is different. Some people recover without doing much, while some people work hard but get half the effort, this is not only true in our psychological adjustment, but also in our lives. For example, some people have never studied much, but when it comes to the exam, they can get a high score by working hard, who do you reason with? ”
He: "Yes, some people casually have hundreds of thousands or millions, and some people have worked hard all their lives, and they may not earn as much as they earn in a day." ”
Me: "So, why do other people recover so quickly, this is different for everyone. Some people's habits are not so strong in the first place, so they recover quickly.
But I don't think there's any need to envy your friends. Just like Seon lost his horse, who knows if it's good or bad? Everyone has their own life story, and it's okay to do your own thing.
It's like we went to Happy Valley. Some people like this project, some like another. Everyone is different, the important thing is to live yourself. ”
Him: "But my depression can't let me live my life well?" ”
Me: "Actually, if you want to live a good life, it is not necessarily related to depression. Do you believe it or not? ”
Him: "Teacher, what do you mean, I don't understand?" ”
Me: "I remember a quote from Stetson that said, 'Disability is nothing more than a limitation.' As for able-bodied people, they want to fly but they can't...... so it's just a limitation. Disability is a limitation, and the able-bodied person has his own limitations. Depression is a limitation, and those who don't have it have their own limitations. There are limitations that we can break through, and there are many more that we can't. So what to do? Can't you live well?
(I recommend friends who are depressed to read two books, "Depression Check-in Self-Help" and "Emotional Self-Help", I believe that the methods in the book will be of good help to you.) ）
In fact, no matter how hard you try, you will have limitations. Birth, old age, sickness and death, which is not a limitation. But why do some people live well?
There's a limb orator named Nick · Hochul, I don't know if you've heard of it. He doesn't have limbs to make his life prosperous, so ah, whether you can live your life well or not really has nothing to do with whether you have depression or not. ”
Him: "Teacher, what you said makes sense. ”
Me: "I'm really just telling a fact. A fact that people don't want to see. ”
Him: "Teacher, then how can I live well?" ”
Me: "That's smart, that's the right question. Many people focus on how to eliminate depression, but few people ask how to live a good life. In fact, if we want to eliminate depression, isn't it just to live a good life? So why not just do it in one step and live a good life? ......”