Sister Yi watches a movie
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Text | Sister Yi (Zhou Guiyi) Ye Ziyao
A few years ago, the story of Su Min, an aunt in her 50s, who traveled on the road by car, touched and inspired many people.
Married for more than 30 years, she has lived a depressed and suffocating life. When he was over 50 years old, he went on the road alone, drove south, went to Yunnan and Hainan, and walked tens of thousands of miles.
Pension of more than 2,000 yuan per month, no savings, relying on short videos and live broadcasts to earn oil money.
A few years later, the surprise was that this wonderful real story was put on the big screen and adapted into the movie "The Determination to Runaway".
I watched the movie twice. There were two scenes that touched me very much.
The heroine Li Hong (played by Yongmei) took her young daughter to eat noodles in a noodle restaurant, because she had no money, she only bought a bowl for her daughter to eat, and she watched.
The daughter asked her mother why she didn't eat it? Li Hong only said: "Don't live like a mother in the future." ”
In another scene, the adult daughter Xiaoxue (played by Wu Qian) becomes a new mother, taking care of the baby at home and raising a pair of twins. Her husband bought her new clothes, she was very happy, and it turned out to be a home dress that was convenient to wear with a baby, and the main fabric was soft and did not hurt the baby.
Disappointed like her, it turns out that it is not her needs to be cared for, but the needs of the children are the most important.
Mother Li Hong stood in front of the burglar bar in the kitchen, feeling that the world in front of her was black and white; Daughter Xiaoxue stood on the balcony where the clothes were drying, and the anti-theft net behind her was like a prison.
At different times in their lives, the fates of the two women faintly overlapped.
They are daughters, wives, mothers, grandmothers, but not themselves.
The phrase "don't live like your mother" seems to be an unattainable blessing, and it has evolved into "I will be you when I grow up".
Like all women who want to get rid of the spell that is difficult to escape.
Until Li Hong decided to run away and chose to let go.
From the moment she ripped off her apron and put her bags on her back, she wanted to be "selfish" once, and the moment she drove away without delay, the spell seemed to be broken.
The moment she asked her daughter to find a way to clean up her life, her daughter and herself were both relieved.
Because, letting go is the real salvation.
Since then, he has saved himself who has endured for 30 years and his daughter who mediated in life.
Li Hong's departure is a step forward for all women.
It is too many women who have lost their subjectivity to take back the first step in their lives.
What is "The Determination to Runaway" about?
I would say that it can be summed up in two of the shortest, but most impactful lines in the movie.
What's the picture?
Why?
They are both deafening questions and questions thrown at everyone—
What is a woman's life?
Everyone can exploit her, on what basis?
Li Hong's situation in the past 30 years, and her determination to run away, are an answer.
Li Hong's dilemma –
Li Hong "pictured" a college dream, but the 18-year-old dream was smashed by her father.
Born in a patriarchal family, he was forced to give up his studies and work as soon as possible to earn money to support his family and support his younger brother.
Talking about personal dreams?
There is no drama, but you will only be scolded: "Don't keep thinking about whether you are in the middle or not?" ”
Li Hong "maps" her own life and has the final say, but she doesn't say anything in her 30 years of married life.
In order to escape from her original family and live an independent life, she got married early, and she couldn't wait to get as far away as possible.
As a result, he found an "honest man" Sun Dayong who seemed to be marriageable to marry, but he turned around and jumped into another "cage".
Every account in Sun Dayong's family has to be calculated exactly with Li Hong. Li Hong's preferences are useless in his eyes.
After 30 years of marriage, Li Hong undertook all the housework and motherhood, and was called around like a free nanny.
There is a window between the kitchen and the living room. The two people standing on each side are under the same roof, but they live in two worlds.
Li Hong is always busy in the kitchen, and Sun Dayong always knocks on the window to "say hello".
Sun Dayong calls himself the "head of the family" and does nothing but is responsible for making decisions for others.
I only do three things a day, fishing, watching TV, and playing table tennis.
Either eating or scolding when you open your mouth. To be precise, he scolded Li Hong, because he couldn't scold others.
Li Hong can't kill live fish, he is afraid, he scolds her for pretending to be a big lady, just lazy.
Li Hong wanted to go out to reunite with an old classmate she hadn't seen for decades, and he scolded her for being selfish.
Thirty years of forbearance, not understood, not seen, all the efforts are taken for granted.
"Whose old ladies aren't all like this?!"
But, why?!
Why is he the "head of the family", why does he have the final say, and why does he have to bear whatever unpleasant things he says?
Why can daughters, wives, mothers, grandmothers, all life roles become naked fetters and shackles?
Why can everyone step on her ego with peace of mind and put her own needs first?
Why make her wait and wait, from 25 years old to 55 years old, to bear the endless "invisible exploitation"?
Why?
Li Hong's exodus——
Li Hong has finally had enough.
For the past 30 years, she has waited for her daughter to grow up, for her daughter to get married, for her daughter to be born, and for them to go to kindergarten......
She didn't want to wait any longer.
She has never left Zhengzhou in 30 years, and this time, she is determined to go out and change her way of life.
She learned to drive, got a driver's license, bought equipment, and set off on the road alone.
Go where you want to go, meet friends you haven't seen in a long time, and fulfill the dream you made when you were 18 years old.
Who stipulated that women could only sit in the passenger seat? Who says that the elderly can only buy a car to pick up the next generation?
Reality allows us to see that a woman who has taken care of her family and taken care of her family for decades is absolutely capable of taking care of herself, what she does, and what she learns, she will not be bad.
Driving, repairing cars, setting up tents, doing live broadcasts, cutting videos...... As long as she wants to, it's not a problem.
This is the resilience and vitality of a woman.
Li Hong, who ran away, finally lived by herself.
When she puts on the red dress she is reluctant to buy and leaves other life roles on the road, she is a rose walking freely, with her own fragrant journey.
This is the follow-up to the real-life version of Nala.
The modern-day version of Nala doesn't need others to speculate about her fate, and from the moment she decides to leave, she is already happy. Others, no need to talk.
It's like a line in the movie, it can't be that all roads are blocked, mountain roads, wild roads, there is always a road.
As long as the steering wheel is in your own hands, you will have the final say in your life from now on.
"The Determination to Runaway" allows us to see that women are not an ism, but a situation.
The plight of Li Hong and Su Min is a true portrayal of most women in the previous generation, and it is also the chronic torment of many women today.
I suppressed my true desires and emotions all my life, and my whole life passed with one regret after another.
"The Determination to Runaway" is powerful because it shines a light on all women, allowing us to truly see our mothers and understand their situation.
Tell them that in this life, they can not reconcile, they can not accept their fate.
So this movie is too suitable as a gift for mom. Take your mom with you to see it, and if you can't, buy a movie ticket and call her to see it!
They also deserve to get back the life they want. While it's still too late.
Go and live for yourself! Don't wait, it's now.