When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple
Franklin Book Club
2024-08-09 10:54Posted in Jiangxi Emotional Field Creator
Text: Maizi (rich book columnist)
Fang Yuan in the TV series "Little Huanxi" once said: "It's good that we middle-aged people know the hardships ourselves." ”
In a short sentence, it not only expresses the hardships and difficulties of middle-aged people, but also reflects the forbearance and compromise of middle-aged people.
When people reach middle age, they have gone through vicissitudes and see through fame and fortune. Therefore, I understand that in this life, people must walk their own way and suffer by themselves.
When people reach middle age, the most important thing is never to endure, but to understand.
People who know how to bow their heads are often not simple, and they all hide wisdom.
Let yourself go, and don't argue with rotten people about right and wrong
There is a question on the Internet: how to communicate with unreasonable and poor quality people?
A high praise replied: Never argue with rotten people. Because their reasoning is unreasonable, and they are deliberately used to defeat you.
In the TV series "Tiandao", Ding Yuanying often goes to a small noodle restaurant to eat noodles, and the boss sees that he dresses differently from ordinary people, and the cigarettes he smokes are not regular consumption, so he is not an ordinary person.
One day, Ding Yuanying went to eat noodles again, and the boss took the initiative to go up and ask Ding Yuanying what he did, Ding Yuanying disdained it and dealt with it casually.
The boss was unhappy, and said with a look of contempt: "It's such a big person, and he can't speak in tune." It's not a shame to just eat and not work. Ding Yuanying continued to eat his noodles, too lazy to pay attention to the noodle restaurant owner's emotions.
Ding Yuanying knows that debating with this kind of person will lead to endless quarrels, which will only consume himself more and increase his troubles.
Therefore, it is better to pretend to be deaf and dumb and ignore it. Imagine if Ding Yuanying gets entangled with this boss, in addition to wasting time, I'm afraid there will be a big fight.
Many times, instead of arguing, it's better to stop because there are more meaningful things in life that are worth doing. Fighting back and forth, fighting to win the truth, fighting to lose the mood. Anything that hurts the mood is a kind of self-consumption.
Huang Xiaoshan said in "Super Speaker": "When I was young, I was young and frivolous, I wanted to change the world, and when I reached middle age, I found that I had no ability to change the world, so I had to compromise with myself." ”
The compromise of adults is half understood, and half is forgotten.
When you encounter a bad person, you don't have to fight about right and wrong, because you can never understand. Don't waste your limited energy on bad people and bad things, and consume yourself.
Life is short, no one doesn't let you go, only you can't let you go.
If you don't let go of yourself and are always entangled with rotten people, how can you be comfortable. Not arguing with rotten people about right and wrong is the most sober way for adults to live.
People who are truly mature and transparent know how to make trade-offs and weigh the pros and cons, rather than chasing after them.
Look down on winning and losing, and don't have to compete for the first place in everything
"Tao Te Ching" has a saying: "The way of heaven is to win without fighting." ”
Lao Tzu believes that everything has its own rules of operation, and those who look down on winning and losing, and those who do not fight, can win.
In the family, look down on winning and losing, know how to be humble, and the family will be harmonious and tranquil;
Get along with friends, look down on winning and losing, take the initiative to suffer, and friendship will be peaceful;
Get along with outsiders, look down on winning and losing, compromise moderately, and socialize peacefully.
Downplaying wins and losses is a kind of wisdom, it is the freedom of the soul, if you can look down on winning and losing, life will win.
One day I was walking in the park and saw two old men playing chess in the park, among which the fat old man won several games in a row, and he had the upper hand, and from time to time he said that he had not met an opponent, so he must not lose.
Another thin old man, in the process of playing chess, always looks indifferent and relaxed. He said that it doesn't matter if you win or lose, what matters is to enjoy the process of playing chess.
After the last few games of chess, the fat old man actually lost a game, he threw the chess pieces angrily, and left with a curse. The thin old man was left with a wry smile: "This is not the scene of the game, Tu Yile only came to have fun, I care too much about winning or losing, it's not good." ”
Yes, the fat old man seems to lose a game of chess, but in fact, what he loses is a good mood, playing chess is an entertainment pastime, he cares too much about winning or losing, loses his original intention, drives away happiness, and is too worthless.
In life, it is not difficult to find:
Some couples fight to the death for the sake of children's education, and even fight to the death, but they win the reason, but lose the relationship.
Some people go out on a trip and could have set off happily, but they scold for grabbing seats, which hurts the harmony and affects the mood of the journey.
Nine times out of ten, life will be much happier if you can look down on winning and losing, know how to empathize, and have a tolerant and considerate heart.
Losing and winning are just relative, and when you think you win, you may be losing; You feel like you've lost, maybe you've won.
Jin Yong wrote in "Chivalrous Journey": "Heaven and earth are rivers and lakes, and the world is smart and confused. There are storms in Vanity Fair, but in the end, you will lose. ”
Where there are people, there are rivers and lakes, and the grievances and grievances of the rivers and lakes are in fame and fortune, there is no real winner in Vanity Fair, and all successes and failures are fleeting.
The world is panicked, all for profit, winning for a while, but losing for a lifetime. The so-called win is just a flash in the pan, and in the end it is still a loss.
Only by looking down on wins and losses, and abandoning the heart of gains and losses, can we find the true value of our own life.
Bearish on winning or losing is a choice, but also a kind of mind, the result is not important, the important thing is to enjoy it and embrace the change.
Know how to keep a low profile and don't show your edge everywhere
It has been said, "Water is low to the sea, and man is low to king." ”
If water remains low-key, it can accumulate into a vast sea, and people can keep a low profile, and it can also achieve the king's career.
Low-key is a kind of self-cultivation, but also a kind of self-protection. People who don't know how to be low-key are like a lonely boat sailing on the sea, and it is difficult to withstand the wind and waves after all.
You Heng, a genius of the Eastern Han Dynasty, is well-read, proficient in subsets of scriptures and history, and is proficient in poetry and songs, but because he is too arrogant, he has many enemies in the court.
Once, You Heng was summoned to the palace to meet Cao Cao, a powerful minister at the time. Cao Cao wanted to take this opportunity to test You Heng's talents, but he didn't expect You Heng to unceremoniously accuse Cao Cao of all kinds of mistakes, and his words were fierce, and everyone present was shocked.
Although Cao Cao was quiet on the surface, he was deeply dissatisfied with You Heng's arrogance in his heart.
At a banquet, he once again openly insulted Cao Cao's generals, and Cao Cao was so angry that he ordered You Heng to be expelled from the capital and never be hired.
You Heng, who left the capital, is still talented, but he is adrift because he has lost the protection of the imperial court.
He took refuge in several princes, but was ostracized and snubbed because he was too arrogant. In the end, he was killed by Huang Zu in a dispute with Huang Zu at the age of twenty-six.
Erudite and talented, this is a good thing, but also a skill. But if you don't know how to keep a low profile and restrain your edge, you will bring disaster to yourself.
The strength or weakness of the ability reflects a person's talent, and whether or not he knows how to act in a low-key manner reflects a person's pattern.
To be a person, you must distinguish the occasion and know when to be low-key and when to be high-profile, so as to stand out in the cruel competition.
In the "Theory of Fortune", it is written: "Therefore, the tree is beautiful in the forest, and the wind will destroy it; Heaps out of the shore, and the flow will be turbulent; Walk above men, and the crowd will not. ”
If a tree is taller than the surrounding trees, the wind will surely knock it down first. A mound of earth protruding from the bank of a river must be hit by the rapids; If a person's conduct, ability, or accomplishments are far above all others, he will inevitably be criticized and envied by others.
Keeping a low profile is a kind of wisdom, and even if you have talent, you shouldn't show it too much.
Human nature is selfish, and in this world, no one really wants you to live better than him except your family. In a complex and volatile environment, keeping a low profile and being humble is often a better way to protect yourself.
There is a saying: "It is better to hide it in the bottom of your heart than to reveal it." ”
The more powerful the person, the more low-key he knows, low-key is not to admit cowardice, but to put away the edge, both look up at the sky, but also bow his head to walk.
Liang Shiqiu wrote in "Middle Age": "The fun of middle age lies in knowing life and knowing oneself, so as to do what one can do and enjoy the life one can enjoy." ”
When people reach middle age, they have gone through the whipping of society and the tempering of life, and finally awakened to their senses.
A lot of pain in life comes from your own desires, and when you know how to break your obsessions, you will suddenly become enlightened.
For rotten people, there is no need to argue with them, it is not only a waste of time, but also self-consumption;
Look down on winning and losing, you don't have to fight for everything to be high, some things can be admitted;
Know how to be a low-key person, because not everyone wants you to live well, so you have to restrain your edge.
Do your best for your own business; For other people's affairs, go with the flow; For the things of God, follow the way of heaven.
May you and I know how to be a sensual person and see the world rationally.
About the author: Maizi, the author of the rich book, the person of the rich book, a middle-aged girl who heals her life with writing, this article: Fu Xiaoshu, the best girlfriend around you, the fourth new book of the rich book
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When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple -
When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple -
When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple -
When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple -
When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple -
When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple -
When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple -
When people reach middle age, people who know how to bow their heads are often not simple