The collision of ideas and the echo of the voices of the people
There is character, conscience, depth, and warmth
"Old Dependent" stills from the source network
I live like this while twisting my transparently
Text/The clouds are light and the wind is light
I often feel that my life is full of contradictions, and I can't screw it.
For example, I feel more and more that time is extremely unfriendly, how can it get faster and faster? It's like being sped up by an invisible hand, compared to the previous ones, it's like time flies, and it's out of control. It made me unhappy and I felt like I was wasting my time every day.
But I obviously like to do things that waste time, such as mopping the floor, petting cats, cranky thoughts, and watching short videos - I'm not watching major events or studying, I like to watch things that don't use my mind at all, such as eating broadcasts, kittens and puppies, and short videos about travel, and recently the little girl who traveled with her cat on a motorcycle was digging Cordyceps with a group of Tibetan friends in Gannan, and her cat named "Eat" was lost for several days, which made me worry about it.
And then time slipped away even faster. I'm often so busy that I push and push what I wanted to do day by day. In the end, I will think: it's okay if you don't do that, what does it matter if you don't write an article! I'm not a writer. I'm a little anxious right now, and it's always so hot in Shenzhen, so I'm going to rest; Let's wait until the day is less anxious and the weather is cooler. Then I was very calm, and I even had such a goal in my heart, and the meaning of life was inexplicably enriched.
"Old Dependent" stills from the source network
Once I asked a buddy who had been retired for seven or eight years, did he miss the busyness of the work back then, and he said no, not at all, before retirement he was a business owner, the factory was in Dongguan, every day early and late home, for decades, sometimes at four or five o'clock in the morning, he was on the way to work.
Think about it: I'm the same, decades of working career like a day early and returning late, those hardships and bitterness, success and failure, drifting and turbulence, seem to have passed by suddenly, for those days, there is no regret, and now there is no nostalgia, which was unimaginable back then.
It seems that as I get older, I will feel this way, and I am not the only one. It is said that time is ruthless, where is time ruthless? Time is like a miracle, it is neatly and even scribbled over everyone's head. Human life is like being fixed in this world, people are using, experiencing, and feeling time, and time is silent, busy and fair to everyone. Every wrinkle, every gray hair, is time shaping and sculpting people. Those floating turbulences are actually just footnotes to fate. - And then I was somewhat relieved about time.
By the way, I'm a retired old lady, I like yoga, I don't like cooking, I like flowers but I don't like dirt. The sisters around me often say that my life is very delicate and I am a role model for them, but I am always worried that my life is too refined, because I no longer pursue fame and fortune, and if I pursue refinement, it is equivalent to rolling up in another field, and it is better to pursue fame and fortune.
"Old Dependent" stills from the source network
There is a sister who likes to grow vegetables, she said that she is willing to play with mud, she also likes to cook, especially like to make pasta, she said that kneading dough is the same as playing with mud, as soon as we communicated, she said that she was worried that her life was too rough, a little pretentious or pretending.
Ha! Our ideas are in harmony with each other, the pursuit of roughness, but also the pursuit of refinement. The conclusion is – whatever.
One day I took a bottle of beer and sat on the balcony in a daze, and the sunset in the sky was beautiful. I looked at it and suddenly felt very sorry for my parents, I didn't have the time or ability to give them the best. After thinking about it again, in the same way, I feel very sorry for my daughter. Think about it again, in the same way, I feel sorry for the cat Qingqing, well-I'm also sorry for the cat Xiaojiu.
And then—and then, I stopped in time,—— if I thought about it any longer, I would feel sorry for everyone in the world.
Because I remembered the reunion with my classmates earlier, we used to talk about this feeling, we women born in the sixties of the last century, grew up in a blend of tradition and modernity, the mission of traditional women and the nature of modern intellectual women such a contradiction pervades our lives, this idea of being sorry for the world is one of them, how did it come about? My daughter's words hit the nail on the head: I feel guilty if I have nothing to do with the drama! Think of yourself as a virgin.
Once I chatted with my daughter and said that if it weren't for her, I might have followed her father here and there as a housewife and a vegetable worm with nothing to do, and I wouldn't have to work so hard to make money by myself, I have been working all my life just to have a stable and peaceful environment for you to study, study abroad, and live. A few days later, I told my apprentice that if it weren't for you, I wouldn't have taken care of the company's affairs after I retired, my children have graduated from college, and I am not short of money, so I should enjoy life. The emotions I spoke were real, but when I thought about it, I was probably still too easy to put pressure on others. Everything you do is your own choice, why should an adult establish "cause and effect" with others? It seems that if you don't "rely on" others, you don't feel completely anything. It's just that you don't want to take responsibility for yourself.
"Old Dependent" stills from the source network
Now I understand why it feels difficult to get along with some people. To make people unhappy is to make people unhappy, and for whatever reason it is not right. was attacked, and I still have to feel that this person is for my own good, which feels very screwed.
It's not that easy to break a jar and break it. Who's day is to pick up and put down, put down and pick up, take and put away, endlessly, until one day you don't have to think about picking it up anymore.
Actually, I would say that life really gets simpler and simpler as you get older. However, everyone is from the pursuit of the most prosperous to the best of the prosperity, and then it can be truly simple. No one is simple at the beginning, and the simplicity at the beginning of life is not really simple. True simplicity can only be created by time.
"Things in the world are always from complex to simple, and simple is perfect".
I have remembered this sentence for a lifetime, and when I was young, I felt that it was nonsense, but now I understand that it is a wise saying.
Who's going to say that?
Erxiang: I thought I would see you again if I didn't see you, and it's good to see you again
Shenzhen Longhua Bookstore: Saturday, July 6, 3 p.m
In July, I met these writers face-to-face in Guangzhou
About the Author
The clouds are light and the wind is light, a post-60s science and engineering woman, now living in Shenzhen. Leisure after retirement. She loves food and beautiful scenery, and she combines reading and yoga. This article was originally published under the official name "Zigui Tanchun" and is reprinted with permission.
The original articles on the platform are authorized by the author to be published on WeChat, and the articles only represent the author's views and have nothing to do with this platform. ~the end~
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