After a breakup, we often encounter two situations:
The first is that the ex said that they could be friends after the breakup, and they did what they said, and they were willing to communicate with you, and even the communication atmosphere was not bad, but you couldn't get back together as soon as you mentioned it.
The second is that the ex is very indifferent to you after the breakup, and he ignores you, and some of them directly block and delete you.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
Many people will be particularly confused by these actions of their ex, wondering why your relationship can't go any further.
You just haven't figured it out here, since the ex mentioned breaking up, it is the result of careful consideration, no matter how loving you were before, as far as the current situation is concerned, it must be that the ex thinks that your relationship is not enough to last, and the problems between you need to be broken up to solve.
Therefore, if you ask the other person to suddenly change this idea, it is definitely not something that you can solve by simply chatting, because the ex will feel that if things are allowed to go in the direction of reconciliation, then he may continue to be hurt in the relationship.
At this time, the question arises, how to break through the ex's defensive psychology against me?
In fact, the answer I gave is nothing special, that is, you should take the initiative to start with friends.
What I say here is that it starts with friends, not just to let your mouth say it, but I hope that you will identify with the identity of friends from the bottom of your heart, and then develop slowly.
But in terms of the actual situation I have encountered, it is that many people don't actually understand the concept of friends.
My advice to you is that you can find a reference object, in your life, find an ordinary friend, and think about your attitude towards this ordinary friend, and what your attitude towards your ex is.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
At the same time, you also have to avoid another trap, that is, if you are friends with your ex, you may have a lot of contact opportunities, but many people can't control their sense of need to get back together in the process of contact with their ex, so they will confide in their hearts, ask for reunion, and so on.
At this time, you just need to consider, do you treat ordinary friends like this? When you think about this, you will know that these practices are all wrong.
Some people will say this: I treat my ex as an ordinary friend, but my ex doesn't treat me as an ordinary friend at all, I talk to him and he ignores me, it's my ex's fault.
Here I also remind you, you have to figure out, who is going to get back together? Since you want to get back together, you don't have too high a demand for your ex, your ex is kind to us, that's what we earned after we broke up; The ex's indifference to us, we should not be too sad, just do our part as ordinary friends.
When the other party lets down their guard against you one day, they will naturally start treating you normally.
In fact, I think that about redemption, it can be described by an ancient poem, that is: moisturizing things silently.
In many cases, it is not that you force it, it will get the result you want, what you should do is based on your feelings when you get along, when you can communicate normally, so that you can get along happily, and then on the basis of happy coexistence, so that you can get along ambiguously, on the basis of being able to get along ambiguously, so that you can get back together.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
In short, you base your compounding on feelings, not on verbal commitments.
You can imagine that if the other party agrees to get back together with you, but the heart is not here with you, will you really be happy to get back together?
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