Text/Xia Mo
01, frontispiece
After a woman gets married, even if she marries love, she can't escape the shadow of the contradiction between her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
After the son gets married, the mother-in-law will feel that her family status is threatened, and she will unconsciously become hostile to her daughter-in-law.
And women just want to live their own lives with their lovers, and they don't want their mother-in-law to interfere too much. In the face of her mother-in-law, she will naturally resist it.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is very delicate, and if you are not careful, it may cause conflicts and affect the happiness index of a big family.
Your mother-in-law treats you badly, so if you deal with it like this, you will win the situation.
02, not in front of her husband, saying that her mother-in-law is not
I read such a sentence on the Internet: "Although mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have different living habits and different living environments, they love the same person." ”
Some women can't help but complain to their husbands when their mother-in-law treats her badly.
In front of her husband, she brought her mother-in-law's bad things together.
She originally wanted to pull her husband into her camp, let her husband support herself, and stand out for herself in front of her mother-in-law.
In fact, it is self-defeating to do so.
If a woman blindly says that her mother-in-law is not in front of her husband, it is easy to destroy the relationship between husband and wife, and also escalate the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Saying that the mother-in-law is not in front of the husband is tantamount to forcing the husband to express his position, choose a wife or a mother? It's a time-old conundrum.
Women should understand that life is with their husbands, and the most important thing is to maintain the relationship with their husbands.
No matter what your mother-in-law does to you, don't complain in front of your husband. We must learn to downplay contradictions, grasp the center of gravity, and work the aspect of our efforts.
The better the relationship between husband and wife, the more attention your husband pays to the family, and he will naturally understand the grievances you suffered in front of your mother-in-law, and will take the initiative to defend you.
03. Don't clash head-on with your mother-in-law, and overcome rigidity with softness
In "Shining Her", Jing Zhiqiu married Wang Liren, and her life was much better than that of ordinary people.
It's just that her mother-in-law doesn't like to see her.
The mother-in-law urged them to have a second child, and gave her an order to not allow her to express her thoughts.
Jing Zhiqiu did not argue, and accepted it all.
She put all the Chinese medicine and stewed supplements that her mother-in-law ordered to boil on the table.
When the husband came back from work, he knew that it was his mother-in-law.
The husband communicated directly with his mother-in-law, so that his mother-in-law would not worry about their affairs in the future, and Jing Zhiqiu achieved his goal without bothering words.
Later, she went to participate in variety shows, but her mother-in-law did not accept her original star status. was very unhappy with her showing up and told her to quit immediately.
Jing Zhiqiu said that he was very helpless, saying that I didn't want to participate either, but I had to pay a lot of liquidated damages.
The mother-in-law felt sorry for her son's money, and when she saw this situation, she gave up.
Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is easy to have a conflict over a trivial matter, resulting in a peaceful family.
Even if your mother-in-law treats you badly and looks down on you everywhere, don't clash head-on with your mother-in-law, and learn to overcome rigidity with softness.
Conflict head-on with her mother-in-law, no matter how much the woman is reasonable, in the end, she either loses the pattern or loses the relationship between husband and wife.
Learning to overcome rigidity with softness, shifting focus, and keeping yourself out of the way is really wise.
04. Enhance your own value and occupy the position of the family
Reader Xiaotang, leave a message with me:
She knew that her mother-in-law had always looked down on her.
My mother-in-law thinks that she is an ordinary college student, and marrying her husband who has studied abroad is a high climb.
Xiaotang is actually a very self-motivated person.
Her mother-in-law's attitude towards her also invisibly inspired her, making her work harder, harder, and seize every opportunity to improve.
She works as well as herself.
Strive to improve academic qualifications, accumulate experience, learn the way of doing things from predecessors, and complete various tasks more efficiently, which has won the recognition of customers and company leaders.
Later, the husband's company went bankrupt.
He was unemployed at home, and his job had never been settled, but Xiaotang used his connections to contact her husband with a position with better pay than before.
Her mother-in-law's attitude towards her has also changed a lot, and she took the initiative to discuss major family matters and ask for her opinions.
A woman's status is earned by herself.
Mother-in-law treats you badly, don't always think about fighting back, thinking about going back.
Instead, you must learn to enhance your own value, give full play to your abilities, and let them accept and respect you from the heart.
Mother-in-law treats you badly, and women don't need to be too entangled, allowing themselves to be controlled by their parents' shortcomings all day long.
Learn to break free from trivial matters, enhance your own value, and win the respect of family members.
05. Summary
After getting married, don't trap yourself in the conflict between your parents and your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and you can't get out.
Regardless of the attitude of others towards you, don't give up on managing your own life.
Strive to make yourself shine and live a shining life.
Don't cling to anyone and be your own hero.
-END-
Author: Xia Mo, a cutting-edge emotional tutor, a psychology scholar, a popular emotional writer with more than 1 billion people on the whole network, a happy woman manager, focusing on emotion, sexes, and mother-in-law and daughter-in-law for more than ten years.