Writer Feng Tang said:
"Educating oneself and managing oneself well is the most important prerequisite for everything to be successful."
This life is a process of constantly playing games with oneself.
Only by constantly overcoming oneself and continuing to cultivate oneself can we live this life well.
A person's self-discipline deep in the bones is: words are warned, actions are stopped, and the heart is fearful.
Be warned
1. Abstain from too much speech
When Confucius looked at the ancestral hall of Zhou Taizu Houji, he saw a bronze statue standing on the steps, and three seals were pasted on his mouth.
On the back of the bronze man, there is also an inscription:
"The ancient prudent words are also the precepts; There is no more to say, more to say and more to lose. ”
The mouth is the door of evil, and the tongue is the knife of the body.
From ancient times to the present, there are many examples of disasters caused by many mouths and tongues.
When Yang Xiu was defeated one after another, he vainly spoke about his boss's intentions and was immediately beheaded by Cao Cao;
When Su Shi changed the law in the imperial court, he talked about sensitive topics, but as a result, he was belittled and left his hometown.
If you are cautious, you will be safe, and if you are cautious, you will be successful.
It is certainly the ability to speak well, but just the right silence is the great wisdom of life.
If you can keep your mouth shut and keep your heart, you can get into less trouble and encounter less disasters in life.
2. Admonition
Zeng Guofan once said:
"Whoever complains too much will be silenced afterwards."
If you have resentment in your heart, the aura around you will definitely not be smooth, and the road of life will become more and more difficult.
Let go of the obstacles in your heart and laugh at the ups and downs of the world, so that you can live your own small life.
Mr. Liang Shuming, the last great Confucian in China, had a difficult time.
He was forced to live in a dilapidated house in a hutong, and was punished every morning for sweeping the roads and toilets.
But he never had a sad face, and after sweeping the floor diligently every day, he went to the Huaqing Pool of Huguo Temple to take a bath, or went to Beihai Park to box.
He always believes that:
"The world will be good in the future, and I am not pessimistic about the future of life."
People live for a lifetime, there is gain, there is loss; There are smooth roads, and there are ups and downs.
Not complaining when encountering problems, not being responsible for frustration, and maintaining a good attitude is the best self-discipline in a person's heart.
3. Admonition
Bai Yang, a master of humanities, accidentally dropped his wallet when he was shopping at a handicraft store.
The shopkeeper not only didn't warn him, but also secretly hid his wallet.
When he came back to look for it, the shopkeeper cried out in a humble heart:
"Do you suspect me of taking it?
Then you go and call the police. ”
As soon as he heard this, Bai Yang, who was already in a hurry, immediately became angry.
However, he saw that there were many customers in the store, and if there was a quarrel, the shopkeeper would not be able to get off the stage, which would make it even more difficult to solve the problem.
So, he stepped forward and persuaded the shopkeeper:
"Only by maintaining credibility can we do good business, and don't lose big because of small things."
The store manager saw that he was kind and pleasant, and left himself with enough dignity, and suddenly felt ashamed and gave him back his wallet.
The Book of Rites says:
"If the water is deep, it will flow slowly, and if people are expensive, they will speak late."
The more impatient you are, the easier it is to say things that you regret.
Hurried words, bad words, and inconsequential small contradictions will also explode into an uncontrollable mess.
And suppressing the anger, saying something slowly, and hitting a big problem, can also win a little room for maneuver.
There is a stop
1. Stop disputes
Many troubles in life come from the word "fight".
When encountering contradictory views, you have to argue with the other party, and the result is that the more you say, the more vague it becomes, and your energy is wasted in vain;
In the face of temporary gains and losses, I want to compete with others to win or lose, and in the end, the more trouble I make, the more out of control, and I end up with a chicken and a flying egg.
A pure heart is the way, and regression is the way forward.
People who are truly rich in heart know how to make peace without fighting, and giving is gaining.
Zhang Zhidong, one of the four famous ministers of the late Qing Dynasty, is known as the "non-competitive layman".
As an official for decades, he has always adhered to his principle of "three non-fighting".
First, do not compete with the laity, second, do not compete with the literati for fame, and third, do not compete with meaningless people.
Regardless of trivial things, he did not take away fame and profit, and spent his mind on important things, which made his career bright.
Lin Yutang said:
"Non-conflict, no great conflict.
If you don't fight, the people of the world will not fight with it. ”
Whether it is right or wrong, fame and fortune, if you don't fight, you can win the clouds.
2. Stop greed
In "The Zuo Biography: Ten Years of Henggong", there is such a story.
Yu Gong, the monarch of Yu State, loves rare treasures, and wants to keep them for himself when he sees them.
Once, he took a fancy to his younger brother Uncle Yu's beautiful jade and asked Uncle Yu for it.
Uncle Yu didn't want to offend him, so he offered Meiyu to him.
But he was not satisfied, and he remembered Uncle Yu's sword again, and sent someone to ask for it again.
His insatiable greed angered Uncle Yu, who angrily raised an army and drove him out of the capital.
In "Pipe Ring", it says:
"The bird that flies high dies of gluttony; The fish of the deep pool, died of the bait. ”
Those who can't control their desires will eventually be destroyed by their desires.
Restrain greed, be content and happy, and only then can you be comfortable in the red dust of temptation.
3. Stop madness
Mr. Sanyin Jin of the Qing Dynasty once said:
"Don't be rampant in your actions, and you will be responsible for the blessings and misfortunes."
If a person's edge is too strong, he will not only burn others, but also set himself on fire.
You Heng, a famous man in the late Eastern Han Dynasty, was talented, but he was arrogant and did not take anyone seriously.
He once made a lot of nonsense about Cao Cao, who promoted himself, and also scolded Liu Biao, who appreciated him, to the point of blood.
After being demoted to Huang Zu as a clerk, he still did not change his unruly style, and spoke disrespectfully to Huang Zu in public and scolded him.
Huang Zu lost face, and angrily ordered him to be executed.
You Heng, who could have done something, finally paid the price of his life for arrogance.
With no one in his eyes, he is easy to hold grudges with others, and his words and deeds are arrogant, which often leads to jealousy.
Life is long, standing on the mountainside and getting carried away, often soon fall into a trough.
The valley is always bent over, and the wise are always gentle.
The more low-key the person, the smoother the road.
Fearful
1. Reverence for the heavens
There is an allusion recorded in the "Treatise on Balance and Blessing and Void".
When King Chu Hui was eating, he found leeches in a dish.
According to the law of the day, he was to behead the chef who made the dish.
But he could not bear to punish the cook, so he quietly swallowed the leech.
That night, he suddenly began to have abdominal pain and couldn't eat for several days.
However, when the abdominal pain improved, he found that the abdominal lump that had plagued him for years had also healed.
In order to save the cook's life, he did not hesitate to swallow leeches, but inadvertently cured his stubborn disease.
reminds me of a sentence in the Tao Te Ching:
"Heaven has no relatives, and he is always with good people."
People are doing it, and the sky is watching.
This "heaven" is the cause and effect that no one can escape.
It is your words and deeds in the past that have made you who you are now.
is not afraid of the way of heaven, does not believe in cause and effect, and sooner or later will have to pay for his wanton and reckless behavior.
And at all times, keep good thoughts and take the right path, and luck will be with you.
2. Reverence
The famous Master Hongyi has been compassionate and compassionate all his life, and he is in awe of all things in heaven and earth.
In his eyes, every flower, grass, insect and ant are all living beings.
Even before he sat on the rattan chair, he would deliberately shake it to avoid crushing the small insects hiding in it.
The relationship between man and nature is not an antagonistic struggle, but a harmonious coexistence.
正所谓:
"The Tao is natural, and heaven and man are one."
If man ruthlessly harms nature and wantonly destroys the environment, he will inevitably suffer evil consequences due to greed and arrogance.
The boomerang thrown at nature will eventually be pricked back into man himself.
Everything has spirituality, and only by respecting nature and revering life can we get the generous gift of heaven and earth.
3. Reverence Parents
There are clouds in the Book of Songs:
"Mourning my parents, giving birth to my hard work, wanting to repay the virtue, Haotian is extremely reckless."
The grace of birth and nurturing is greater than the sky, and the kindness of our parents will not be finished in our lifetime.
If a person doesn't even pay attention to his parents, he loses the bottom line of being a human being.
No matter how strong the ability and ability are, it will not be beneficial to the family and society.
And be kind to your parents and be grateful, and good fortune will come from you.
In "Twenty-Four Filial Piety", there is a well-known filial son named Jiang Ge.
During the war, he fled with his mother on his back and unfortunately encountered robbers.
When the bandits saw that he cared for his mother, they showed mercy to him and let him live.
After escaping into the city, he supported his mother by working as a hired hand, and he himself was in rags, but he kept her food and clothing without worry.
The local magnates were very moved when they heard about this and recommended him to be a filial piety official.
Later, his career went smoothly, and he was promoted to the fifth rank, which completely changed his fate.
In your attitude towards your parents, there is often a hidden attitude towards you in the world.
The ancients:
"Only filial piety to your parents can relieve your worries."
A family that is grateful to its parents and attaches importance to filial piety can cultivate the best feng shui.
▽
In Mencius, it says:
"People can do something, and then they can do something."
Being a man is important in self-knowledge, and life is expensive in self-control.
Only by speaking carefully, observing the precepts, and being in awe can we live in peace in the troubled world.