My name is Li Min, I am 45 years old this year, I am a clerk in an ordinary company, I am busy with work on weekdays, my life is dull, and my family is also harmonious and beautiful. My husband Zhao Yong, who is two years older than me, is an engineer who works rigorously and usually doesn't talk much. We have a sixteen-year-old daughter, Xiaoxue, who is in her first year of high school.
This story takes place in the autumn of last year, when the season was always a little cool, but it was also during that time that my life took some unexpected changes.
Zhao Yong and I have always had a smooth married life, although not as passionate as when we were newly married, but there are no particular contradictions or problems. However, one night last fall, our life as a couple suddenly became unusual.
That night, Xiaoxue went back to her room early to rest, and Zhao Yong and I were ready to turn off the lights and go to sleep. Suddenly, I felt a strong physical reaction and involuntarily made a sound. It wasn't loud, but it was clear in the stillness of the night. Zhao Yong was obviously stunned for a moment, and then showed a smile, I didn't think much about it, and continued to immerse myself in that indescribable feeling.
However, it didn't end there. Over the next few days, whenever we were in a couple's life, I would make noises that gradually became louder, sometimes even for the light snow in the next room to be heard. This left me feeling very confused and embarrassed.
One night, Xiaoxue suddenly asked me after dinner, "Mom, have you been sick lately?" I always hear you screaming at night. I was stunned for a moment, not knowing how to answer, so I had to perfunctorily say that I had a nightmare. Zhao Yong listened on the side, and also showed a thoughtful expression.
Since then, I've started to pay attention to my reactions, but I still can't control my own sound every time. In order to figure out the reason, I looked up a lot of information on the Internet, and even secretly went to the hospital and asked some doctors. Most of their responses were physiological and normal, nothing serious, but that didn't solve my confusion.
The turning point came on a weekend afternoon. On that day, Zhao Yong and I accompanied Xiaoxue to the park to play, and happened to meet an old friend we hadn't seen for many years, Dr. Lin. Dr. Lim was my classmate in college and now works as a psychiatrist in a hospital. We exchanged a few pleasantries and sat down to chat.
Referring to the topic of recent research, Dr. Lim mentioned some phenomena in the life of couples. My heart fluttered, and I took the opportunity to ask him, "Dr. Lin, why do some women make voices in married life?" ”
Dr. Lin looked at me and said with a smile, "This is a good question, but there are many reasons, which may be physical or psychological. He explained in detail the reasons for physiological reactions, nervous system, communication, psychological factors, and many other aspects.
Hearing these explanations, it dawned on me that my reaction was so normal, I just hadn't noticed it before. Dr. Lim's explanation was a great relief to me, but it also made me think. Did there go wrong with the communication between me and Zhao Yong? Are we not emotionally connected enough?
That night, Zhao Yong and I talked a lot, we talked about the changes over the past few days, and we also talked about each other's feelings. Zhao Yong admitted frankly that he had noticed the changes in me for a long time, but he never dared to ask. He also said that he actually liked my voice because it made him feel what I really felt.
Through this conversation, Zhao Yong and I have become more intimate, and we not only have better communication in our married life, but also get along more harmoniously. Xiaoxue also stopped asking me those awkward questions, because we noticed the soundproofing problem and made sure not to disturb her.
Later, I gradually got used to my body's reaction and was no longer confused and embarrassed by it. Zhao Yong also became more considerate and understanding of me, and our married life became happier.
Communication between husband and wife is very important, and many issues seem complicated, but in fact, there is just a lack of honest communication. As long as we understand each other, any problem can be solved.