Text: Marriage counselor Liu Jie
In love, everyone wants to be the most special and important person in the eyes of the other party.
However, as time goes by, life becomes more trivial, and some feelings slowly change.
You will find that he starts to get a little impatient when talking to you, and even sometimes when you are next to him, it is as if he can't see you.
What's worse, he may also say things that make you feel like you're not that important.
It's really uncomfortable, like being disliked.
In fact, this is a sign that there is something wrong with your relationship.
If you find that the opposite sex around you behaves to you in the following ways, it is actually silently telling you: "Don't get along, you should have ended this relationship a long time ago." ”
01
Dismissive of your words
Love without communication can't last long.
When a person talks to you with an impatient attitude, then your relationship has already begun to sour.
For example, you share with him with great interest and communicate with him happily. He always responds with absent-minded "um" or "oh", and even interrupts you before you finish.
This behavior shows that he no longer cares about your feelings and thoughts, and has no interest in your words.
Zhang Ailing once said: "For people after the age of 30, ten or eight years is just a matter of seams. ”
But if a person is not willing to give you enough attention and respect in a short conversation, then how much quality can such a relationship have over a long period of time?
02
Constantly belittle you
A person who genuinely likes you, he will appreciate you and encourage you, rather than deliberately belittle you.
If you find that he is always dismissive of everything about you, even sneering, then this is actually a sign of your dislike.
For example, if you get a promotion and a raise, he says, "What's so happy about it, people who have just joined the unit are paid more than you." ”
Or you buy a beautiful dress, but he laughs at you: "You can't control this style at all, you don't have that temperament." ”
As Rabindranath Tagore said, "If you weep for missing the sun, you will miss the stars too." ”
In a relationship, if you are always belittled and suppressed, you will miss the opportunity to become a better version of yourself.
03
Indifferent to your needs
In a good relationship, both of them care about each other's needs and feelings.
But if you find that he is indifferent to your needs or even ignores your feelings, this is actually a sign that he doesn't care about you.
For example, if you are sick and want him to pour you a glass of water, but he only cares about playing with his phone; You worked late overtime and wanted him to pick you up, but he excused himself and said he didn't have time.
William Shakespeare once said, "True love cannot be expressed in words, but deeds are the best illustration of faithfulness." ”
If a person is unwilling to meet even your most basic needs, how much love can he have?
04
Keep your distance from you
Physical intimacy is the truest expression of love.
But if he always wants to keep his distance from you and is unwilling to have any physical contact with you, he is actually silently rejecting you.
For example, when walking together, he always walks in front of or behind you and avoids walking side by side with you; In public, he is also reluctant to hold hands with you, and if you take the initiative to take his hand, he will throw you away.
This physical rejection is often a sign that he is not willing to maintain an intimate relationship with you anymore.
As Xu Zhimo wrote in his poem: "I walk gently, just as I come gently." ”
When a person begins to distance himself from you, perhaps this is when he is ready to leave gently.
When there are these "disgusting" signals in a relationship, we should seriously consider whether the relationship is still necessary to continue.
Mr. Yang Jiang once said: "No matter which step you go up in life, there are people looking up at you at the bottom of the steps, and there are people looking down on you on the steps. ”
The same is true in a relationship, we need to be treated as equals and even more so with respect. When these are no longer there, then it's time to consider letting go of the relationship.
If a relationship makes you feel unhappy, uncomfortable, or even slighted or disliked, let it go decisively, don't be reluctant.