In marriage, we often fall into the misconception that couples should be as close as relatives.
However, this perception can make us lose ourselves in a marriage and also make the other person feel stressed.
In fact, the relationship between husband and wife in marriage should be a special intimate relationship, which should have both the warmth of family affection and the respect of friendship.
Therefore, no matter how affectionate two people are after marriage, don't treat each other as relatives.
1. Marriage is not a continuation of family affection
In the world of marriage, we often unconsciously regard each other as relatives, and take it for granted that each other should give and give everything without reservation.
is like Liu Yiyang and Tong Jiaqian in "The Age of Naked Marriage", they fell into such a misunderstanding after marriage.
Tong Jiaqian felt that Liu Yiyang should meet all her needs unconditionally, and Liu Yiyang also tried his best to pay, but both of them gradually lost themselves in this mode.
Tong Jiaqian lost her former independence and freedom, and Liu Yiyang was also overwhelmed.
However, in fact, this kind of thinking is likely to cause us to lose ourselves in marriage and add a lot of stress to the other person.
You must know that marriage is not a simple continuation of family affection, it is actually a completely new relationship.
In marriage, we must respect each other's unique personality and various needs, and cannot overly bind each other in the name of love.
At the same time, we must also hold on to our own independence and self-worth, and we cannot completely give up on self-growth and development because of marriage.
is like Tong Jiaqian in the play, if she can continue to maintain her interests and friends in marriage, she may not become so troubled in marriage.
And if Liu Yiyang could pay more attention to his career development, he would not become so anxious and helpless under economic pressure.
Only in this way can we find true balance and happiness in our marriage and let the flower of marriage bloom for a long time.
2. Maintain an appropriate sense of distance
In the long river of marriage, many couples will gradually become extremely intimate after entering the marriage hall, so intimate that they seem to be one with each other, and even unconsciously lose their original independence.
They think that this is the ultimate embodiment of love, but they don't know that there are hidden dangers in this state.
When the two are too close and have no boundaries and no space for themselves, all kinds of problems will quietly breed.
Like tightly wound vines, they seem to be intimate, but after a long time, they will bind and suppress each other.
This kind of overly intimate relationship is very likely to become the fuse of contradictions and conflicts between husband and wife, and the slightest disagreement can be infinitely magnified, causing heated arguments and quarrels.
Because of this, it is very necessary for couples to maintain a proper sense of distance.
This sense of distance is not to alienate each other, but to give each other some independent space and time, so that each can breathe, grow and think freely in their own corner.
When one partner is able to have time to pursue their hobbies and the other can quietly go about their own affairs, they will find themselves again and will cherish their time together more.
In this way, the relationship between husband and wife will become healthier and more stable, like a solid foundation that can withstand the storms of life.
They can enjoy intimate moments while shining in their respective fields, and together they can build a harmonious, happy and vibrant married life.
3. Don't take the other party's contribution for granted
In the long journey of marriage, we often fall into a stereotype.
It's all too easy to take the other person's constant supply for granted, and subconsciously firmly believe that this is what the other person is supposed to do. I
They gradually get lost in this kind of naturalness, become more and more selfish, and no longer have a sense of gratitude for that precious contribution.
When we enjoy each other's care, care and dedication with peace of mind, we forget that every contribution is full of affection and love.
Just like the breakfast prepared every morning, the lamp left in the middle of the night, and the countless thoughtful moments in life, they should not be easily ignored.
If we keep thinking like this, the marriage will gradually become unbalanced.
Therefore, we must learn to be grateful for each other's every effort. When the other person does a small thing for us, we should sincerely express our gratitude; When the other party has made great efforts for us, we must give full recognition and cherishment.
At the same time, we ourselves must also actively give for each other, not just blindly demand.
When we think about each other with our hearts, and give love and care, the other person can also truly feel our love.
In short, no matter how affectionate two people are after marriage, they should not treat each other as relatives. We need to maintain a proper sense of distance, learn to be grateful for each other's efforts, keep love fresh, and establish a good communication mechanism, so as to build a healthier and more harmonious marriage relationship. I hope that every couple can cherish each other's feelings and create a happy family together.