#头条创作挑战赛#
Xi Murong once affectionately expounded such a philosophy: "Friendship is like the elegant fragrance of flowers, the more fresh and subtle, the more haunting it is, and the more it can last for a long time in the long river of time." ”
Whether it's a family relationship that is thicker than water, or a deep and sincere friendship, even if the emotion is close, it is necessary to maintain a sense of distance.
I strongly agree with this wise adage: "The profundity of a relationship often lies in the moderation and proportionality of the dialogue." ”
In reality, many friendships fail to properly grasp the measurement of mutual interactions, and eventually unfortunately break down.
Especially between friends of the opposite sex, even if the friendship is deep, the following three areas should be avoided when talking in private, so as not to inadvertently cross the boundary.
Complaining about partner shortcomings
As the old saying goes: "No one is perfect without gold." "In this vast world, there is no such thing as an absolutely perfect individual, and what we think of as perfection often stems from the beautiful illusions brought about by deep affection.
Marriage is a symphony of two people dancing together, no matter what ups and downs they encounter, they should stick to the secret garden of their world and avoid leaking their troubles to the ears of third people.
Even if you are close to a friend of the opposite sex, you should not lightly confide in your partner's dissatisfaction and flaws, knowing that there is inevitably a little grit in every sincere emotion.
Everyone is flawed, and the wisdom of getting along between husband and wife lies in mutual acceptance and tolerance, rather than endless criticism and complaints. Casually confiding in friends of the opposite sex about trivial conflicts or private topics between husband and wife is not only an invasion of the dignity of the partner, but also may quietly plant the seeds of a rift in the foundation of the marriage.
When there is a discrepancy in the relationship between the two, it is important to face the problem with an introspective attitude, and resolve the conflict through in-depth communication and actively looking for solutions. If you blindly vent your dissatisfaction with your partner to your friends of the opposite sex and complain about the bits and pieces of married life, this will not only make the husband and wife feel wear and tear.
On the other hand, the warmth and comfort of friends of the opposite sex may inadvertently trigger a contrasting psychology towards the partner, breed subtle feelings, and then exacerbate the boredom of the partner, which may eventually lead to a complete breakdown of the couple's relationship.
Husband and wife are like mandarin ducks living on the same branch, only by knowing the way of cherishing and tolerating and understanding each other can they weave a harmonious and happy family picture together.
I don't know how to refuse the other party
Sanmao once profoundly admonished us: "There is no need to be afraid of reasonable rejection of others. "In the process of getting along with the opposite sex, it is especially necessary to handle it properly and avoid overly intimate emotional expressions between words.
The relationship between men and women is like a nuanced picture, and any rash move may quietly unbalance this harmonious color, and alienate the original pure relationship.
Even if the friendship between the opposite sex is deep, it is not unprincipled and unlimited to cater to the needs of the other party, and timely rejection is a kind of wisdom, but also a respect and protection for the relationship between the two parties.
The most offensive behavior in interpersonal communication is to accept and enjoy the ambiguous behavior of others under the pretext of "not knowing how to refuse". This ambiguity often breeds misunderstandings and upsets the balance of the relationship.
In many cases, it is precisely because of the lack of the necessary sense of boundaries in the behavior of the opposite sex that leads the other party to be confused in emotional cognition and go astray.
Such a consequence is often a double blow, which may not only disintegrate the foundation of one's marriage, but also bury the original precious friendship with the other party, and even bring irreparable damage to the other party.
People should follow the principle of "doing something, not doing something", accurately grasp the scale in interactive interactions, not only show tolerance and understanding, but also adhere to the bottom line of personal morality.
No matter who we treat, we should uphold the principle of rock solidity, and once we touch the boundary, we must resolutely reject the other person's behavior beyond the norm, leaving no room for reverie.
In short, even if the relationship between a man and a woman is close, it is necessary to establish a clear and strong sense of boundaries, so that the flower of friendship can bloom and be renewed for a long time.
Ask for help frequently
As the saying goes, "The heaviest debt in the world is the debt of human affection and the debt of emotion." "In this long journey of life, we will inevitably need help from others, and it is human nature to ask others for help.
However, if we blindly show our own weakness, we rush to find solutions to other people's difficulties whenever we encounter difficulties, and over time, this behavior will exceed the boundaries of interpersonal communication. In the face of that presence of being on call and caring at any time, people often find it difficult to resist the temptation of this warmth, so as to easily cross that delicate line.
The most important thing to be wary of in interactions between people of the opposite sex is not mutual assistance to each other, but excessive frequency of unilateral help. You know, material wealth has its limit, but the value of emotions is immeasurable; Every favor will become the heaviest burden on your shoulders.
When men and women live together, when facing the challenges of life, do not rely too much on each other's strength, after all, self-reliance is the foundation of dealing with all difficulties. Even if you have a deep friendship, you need to always pay attention to the scale of your interactions to avoid over-dependence on others at the emotional level.
Unrestrained seeking for help will only cause both parties to lose their sense of proportion in the process of getting along, which may eventually lead to a lose-lose outcome.
Therefore, when getting along with the opposite sex, it is necessary to maintain an appropriate distance and not be too close or dependent, so that the relationship can be open and stable for a long time.
In the hit drama "Witty Love", actor Li Qin expressed a deeply rooted opinion on the boundary between men and women: "The ideal way to get along with the opposite sex lies in accurately grasping the proportions of communication, creating a stable sense of security for lovers and providing comfortable comfort for friends." This insight has undoubtedly struck a wide chord.
Loyalty to one's partner is not an external choice or a reluctant compromise, but comes from the deep care and fiery love for each other in the heart, and then cherishes and cares for this emotion.
No matter how deep the friendship with the opposite sex is, it is necessary to maintain an appropriate distance and skillfully grasp the sense of proportion in the relationship, only in this way can the most harmonious and beautiful relationship be maintained.
We sincerely invite you to light up the [Follow] button and share this wisdom with your friends, and may we all understand and practice the art of proportionality together in the process of getting along with the opposite sex, and draw a clear and respectful boundary for each other's emotional world.