In my son's class, there was a child who was a bit passive among the children because he was always obedient and didn't make his own decisions, and everyone looked down on him.
Every time I hear my son talk about such a scene, I feel sad and at the same time, I can't help but think: as a mother, how can I teach my children to be able to cope with complex interpersonal relationships?
Looking back on my own upbringing, I am deeply grateful for the teachings my mother gave me in the world.
Those simple but profound truths have saved me many detours on the road of life. Now, I would like to share these valuable experiences with every parent, hoping that our children can benefit from them and better face the challenges of the future.
1. Don't listen to others when you encounter problems, and take your own ideas
Self-reliance is the first step to growth.
Children, life is full of choices and decisions.
When you are faced with a difficult problem, do not rush to listen to the opinions of others, but learn to think independently and make judgments based on your own situation and needs.
Remember, everyone's experience and background is different, and other people's advice may not be exactly what you need.
Only you know yourself best, so trust your instincts and judgment.
As a mother, it is important to teach your child to have the courage to make decisions and take responsibility for the consequences. This way they are able to think independently when they encounter problems, rather than blindly following others. This is the foundation for developing leadership and self-confidence.
Educate children to learn to analyze the situation, weigh the pros and cons, and make the most reasonable choice. For example, when choosing a friend or toy, encourage them to express their preferences rather than just following the trend because of someone else's choice.
Child, learn to make your own decisions, you will be more confident, independent, and more in control of your own life.
Second, don't use up all your skills, learn to keep a little
Full of losses, humble benefits.
Child, your abilities and abilities are limited, don't always think about doing everything to the best and the best. Learn to allocate your energy and time reasonably and leave some room for yourself.
That way, when you encounter bigger challenges or need to deal with unexpected situations, you will have enough reserves to deal with them.
At the same time, teach children to always maintain a learning attitude, constantly enrich themselves, and don't show all their skills and knowledge at once.
This will keep you competitive and avoid causing unnecessary jealousy.
For example, when children are learning new skills, encourage them to master the basics first and then work their way up without rushing to show results.
Remember, life is like a marathon, not about how fast you start out, but about whether you can maintain a steady pace for a long time.
So, don't give it your all at the beginning, but learn to retain some strength so that you can go further and more steadily.
3. Don't help too much, others take it as a habit
Child, helpfulness is a virtue, but also in moderation. If you always help others unconditionally, they may take your help for granted and even become dependent.
This way, when you can't help them anymore one day, they may develop resentment and resentment towards you.
Therefore, it is necessary to learn to say "no" at the right time, teach children to learn to refuse at the right time, and give others the opportunity to solve the problem on their own, which is also a kind of respect for the growth of others, and it can make others understand that your help is not endless.
At the same time, it is also necessary to teach them to be independent and autonomous, so that they can only succeed and grow through their own efforts.
Fourth, don't talk too hard, leave some leeway
The art of communication lies in expressing clearly rather than absolutely.
Child, language is a double-edged sword, it can both hurt and save people. When communicating with people, you must pay attention to the grasp of words, and do not speak too categorically and rigidly. Leaving some leeway and flexibility will not only make the conversation more harmonious, but also avoid saying irreparable words on the spur of the moment.
For example, when your child is discussing a topic with others, teach them to use words such as "I think" and "maybe" and avoid being too categorical.
At the same time, it is necessary to be more understanding and tolerant when interacting with others, and less to blame and criticize. Use gentle language to express your own opinions and ideas, and listen to others' opinions and suggestions with an understanding attitude.
In this way, your interpersonal relationships will be more harmonious and stable, and you will be better able to earn the respect and trust of others.
Fifth, be tactful in handling things, and don't drive people to a dead end
Children, you should learn to be tactful and tactful, and leave some room and retreat for others.
This will not only avoid a lot of unnecessary conflicts and contradictions, but also earn the gratitude and respect of others.
For example, when it is time to refuse someone else's request, teach your child to use a more tactful way instead of saying "no" directly.
At the same time, we must also learn to empathize and understand the situation and feelings of others. When dealing with problems, consider the interests and feelings of the other party, so that your decisions and actions will be more fair and reasonable.
6. Don't be too smart and learn to hide
"Great wisdom and foolishness" is the essence of Chinese culture. Teach children not to show their intelligence everywhere, and hide their talents at the right time to avoid becoming the target of others' attacks.
Revealing one's intelligence too much may make others jealous and defensive, and even cause unnecessary trouble and trouble.
So, learn to be humble and low-key, and use your ingenuity in the right place. Show your talents and abilities when appropriate, but also know how to restrain and hide.
For example, if a child is always acting omniscient in the game, you can guide them to be humble and leave room for other children to behave.
This way, you can better protect yourself from being taken advantage of or attacked.
Seventh, don't be too overflowing with favors, and know how to make trade-offs
Children, human feelings are an inevitable part of life. But also be careful not to be too widespread and casual.
Learn to make trade-offs and measure when interacting with others, and don't sacrifice your principles and bottom line in order to cater to others.
Not all favors need to be responded to, and knowing how to make trade-offs can better manage one's social circle. For example, when multiple friends invite your child to participate in an activity at the same time, teach them to learn to make choices based on their actual situation and depth of feelings.
At the same time, we must also know how to be grateful and reciprocate.
Be grateful for the help and support of others and reciprocate them in a timely manner; Respond to other people's requests and requests according to their actual situation and ability. In this way, your relationships will be healthier and more stable.
8. Don't show your emotions casually, it's easy to be caught
Child, emotional management is an important sign of a person's maturity. It is a skill that everyone should master.
In life, learn to control your emotions and don't let them easily show up in your face or words. Because once your emotions are seen through or exploited by others, you may be attacked or exploited by them.
As a mother, teach your child to calm down when they are emotionally fluctuating, such as taking deep breaths, counting downs, etc.
Therefore, no matter what situation you encounter, you must stay calm and rational, use reason to analyze and solve problems, and learn to empathize and understand the emotions and needs of others, so that you can get along and cooperate with others better.
9. Don't rush to do things, it's easy to be outstanding
Children, don't always rush to do things at work or in life, especially those things that are easy to be in the limelight.
Being too eager for quick success will only make people feel immature and steady. It is easy to become the target of others' attacks, and it also puts yourself in unnecessary troubles and difficulties.
In group activities at home or at school, children are encouraged to take the initiative, but also pay attention to observing and learning from the actions of others, and do not rush to steal the limelight.
We must learn to keep a low profile and be a high-profile person. Use strength and achievements to prove your worth and ability, rather than stealing the limelight to win attention. At the same time, we must also learn to work with a team and respect the contributions and contributions of others, so that we can better achieve our goals and values.
10. Heart-to-heart and heart-to-heart, you will always be hurt
Child, sincerity and trust are the foundation of a deep friendship, but also be careful not to give all your feelings and trust too much.
Not everyone in this world is worthy of you. If you meet someone you don't trust, your efforts can turn into a knife that hurts you.
Therefore, before making heart-to-heart contacts, you must learn to observe and judge to ensure that your feelings and trust will not be disappointed.
For example, when sharing personal feelings or secrets, teach children to identify people they can trust, rather than opening up to everyone randomly.
At the same time, maintain a certain sense of mystery and personal space, so that you can better protect yourself, and do not easily trust strangers or seemingly good people.
Only by establishing a healthy and stable interpersonal relationship can you be more calm and comfortable on the road ahead.
As parents, we always hope that our children can grow up to be wise and responsible. These ten proverbs for living in the world, although simple, contain profound philosophies of life. I hope it can inspire more families.
Remember, life is not only an adventure, but also a school, and we are the most intimate mentors for children.
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