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Written about the moon
Blind date used to be an effective way for many people to choose to quickly find the other half of their lives.
Whether it is a variety of blind date groups, park blind date corners, matchmaker introductions and other blind date methods have been popular for a while.
On the other hand, nowadays, many young people are extremely reluctant to go on a blind date, and they have psychological disgust when they hear these two words.
Why do young people nowadays prefer to be older and unmarried, and no matter how anxious they are, they don't choose to go on a blind date?
"Rather lack than abuse" rejects marriages with a clear price
When it comes to blind dates, the first impression in many people's minds is all kinds of blind date overturning scenes.
I remember that during the Chinese New Year, I saw many netizens' real and strange blind date experiences on social platforms.
A college student who has just graduated was introduced by the village matchmaker to a middle-aged uncle who was divorced with two children, on the grounds that the other party's conditions were good and there was no financial pressure to marry.
The only condition is to be a good stepmother and take good care of the two children.
The young man who returned to the village from the electronics factory in other places for the New Year was introduced to a girl with a disabled leg in the next village, and the reason was that the young man's family conditions were not good.
In some villages, there are many boys of marriage age, and at the same time, five or six people go to the same family to go on a blind date with girls, and everyone abides by discipline and lines up one by one.
This scene is like visiting the vegetable market, selecting buyers of goods one by one.
"How many people in the family, whether they have brothers and sisters, how many apartments, how many cars, how much work, and how much savings" have become a necessary topic for blind dates.
It's as if the two are not talking about marriage, but about buyers and sellers bargaining in the market.
The act of labeling a marriage and clearly marking the price has become a common rule.
Most people don't go on blind dates for affection, and the over-intensified purposefulness has put a cage on the marriage that has not yet taken shape.
In the world of blind dates, the first condition for marriage is not affection, but external additional conditions.
The inability to accept the materialization of feelings is an important reason for young people to refuse blind dates nowadays.
Marriage is not child's play
In the eyes of the older generation, marriage is the top priority, and no matter how it is done, the most important thing is to achieve the purpose of marriage.
For many post-90s people, many of the marriages of their parents' generation are not based on feelings, but are emotionless marriages that are combined under the matchmaker's matchmaking.
The older generation once said that they can get married first, and after marriage, when two people get along for a long time, they will naturally have feelings.
But is that really the case? I'm sure many people will give a negative answer.
In real life, many parents tolerate it for the sake of their children, and married life is nothing more than getting by.
After seeing the life of their parents living together because of a blind date, how can young people nowadays be willing to copy and paste their marriage?
The blind date focuses on a quick decision, and the whole process of acquaintance, acquaintance, and love is completed within two or three months.
No matter how anxious a person is, he will not be as fast as riding a rocket in front of his feelings.
In just a few months, maybe you haven't even figured out a person's personality, temperament, disgust and preferences, how can you talk about feelings?
I have a friend who has a good relationship, and because my parents are anxious to hold their grandson, they urge my friend to get married all day long.
Originally, my friend had a girlfriend who had been in love for two years, and the relationship between the two was stable, but it was not yet to the point of talking about marriage.
By chance, a friend and his girlfriend were out shopping and ran into their friend's parents, and out of politeness, the girlfriend offered to invite the elders to dinner in the evening.
Unexpectedly, it was this meal that ended the relationship between friends that lasted for two years.
At the dinner table, the parents got married and had children in three sentences, and they had to finalize the wedding date on the spot.
In the girl's eyes, she seems to be a fertility machine, and she has to quickly complete the inheritance in the mouths of her boyfriend's parents.
It didn't take long for the girl to propose to break up with her friend, after all, marriage is not a matter of two people, and not being able to get along with her boyfriend's parents also affects the relationship.
Later, under the introduction of his parents, his friend met the daughter of his mother's friend, and the two got engaged in just two months.
After knowing each other for less than four months, I walked into the marriage hall.
I still remember a few days before I got married, a friend asked me, "Why do people get married?"
I didn't answer, and from this question, it's clear that getting married wasn't the intention of friends.
I don't know how to speak, I can't do anything in the face of my friend's predicament, and I don't want to add to the other person's troubles.
Marriage is not child's play, and it may be the greatest respect young people have for marriage now.
"Start a family before starting a business" is a thing of the past
The older generation says, "Start a family first and then start a business".
With a family, there is a burden on the body, and out of responsibility to the family, we will continue to work hard to create a beautiful family.
On the other hand, today's young people, the purpose of struggle has long changed.
Struggle is to improve oneself and complete one's own transformation, not to work hard for anyone, nor to work hard when you hear someone's encouragement.
Most people are willing to work harder for their own sake.
The nature of society has changed, which has led to a qualitative change in the order in which young people start a family.
In the past, you could farm in the countryside, and if you get married, you will have one more person in the family and one more laborer, and as long as you are willing to work hard, you will reap the rewards.
Therefore, people at that time chose to marry early, and did not worry about fertility problems, and when the child was born, the grain grown in the field could raise the child.
Nowadays, there are fewer and fewer people who farm the land, and even in the countryside, they will first look at each other's conditions and select the best, let alone the cities with greater economic pressure.
In the past, many people from their parents' generation had stable jobs, and one job was for a lifetime.
Therefore, starting a family first must be the first choice for many people.
In today's society, apart from the public service system, there is no so-called stable job.
Coupled with the high socio-economic pressure, whether it is the cost of marriage or raising offspring, it is a huge expense.
Even if parents say that they can share the pressure of raising children, they are willing to help the young couple after marriage, but now many young people are still unwilling to be old people.
I have been reading for so many years, and my parents have raised me for 20 years, if I still rely on my parents in the future, what is the difference between this and a giant baby who has not been weaned?
Therefore, many people now choose to make a career first in order to have a more harmonious married life in the future.
"Start a business first and then start a family" has become the mainstream concept of marriage among contemporary young people.
In the face of parents who urge their families to arrange blind dates all day long, such a view of marriage obviously cannot be recognized.
Avoiding blind dates has also become their silent resistance against the old concept of marriage.
epilogue
Blind date is a narrow social circle, and there is nothing wrong with the way of knowing the opposite sex, what is wrong is the demonized blind date.
Let the blind date return to the essence, based on feelings, and free love for the purpose, I believe that many people will also change their views on blind dates.