My house is located in an old neighborhood in the center of the city, and although the building is old, the décor of the home has a unique atmosphere. In the hall, a pair of antique carved wood vases are placed, and on the wall are pictures of my mother-in-law when she was young. In the photo, her long curly hair, bright eyes, and delicate face reveal a charm of the old times. On the cabinet by the window, there is a large gold bracelet of great value, which is a family heirloom left by my grandmother.
My name is Zhang Xiaoming, I am 35 years old, and I work as a project manager in a foreign-funded company. Due to our busy work, my wife and I are away from home all year round, and my mother-in-law takes care of our children at home. My mother-in-law's surname is Liu, and although her temper is a little stubborn, she is undoubtedly kind to her family.
And my sister-in-law, Liu Sisi, is a gorgeous and moving beauty. She is 25 years old and has been pampered by her mother-in-law since she was a child. However, her wayward behavior often upsets me.
"Mother, did you see my big gold bracelet? I haven't seen a shadow of it all morning. I hurried into the living room and asked anxiously.
My mother-in-law raised her head slowly, squinted at me for a while, and said slowly, "Ahh "
"What?" I was completely stunned, "How can you give it away without permission? It's a family heirloom left by your ancestors!"
My heart was suddenly struck by an indescribable anxiety and anger, and my blood seemed to flow upstream. The movement grew louder and louder, and I began to rummage around, turning the whole room upside down.
"Silly boy, what are you making such a fuss about?" The mother-in-law still looked nonchalant, "Your sister-in-law is about to get married, what's the use of keeping that gold bracelet? "
"But Po, that's a family heirloom left by your ancestors!" My voice trembled a little with excitement, "How can you make the decision to give it away, and why do you always favor Sisi and have such an attitude towards me?"
I could no longer calm down, and a sense of hopelessness arose over me. The figure of my grandmother came to mind again and again, and she had told me countless times to pass on this gold bracelet to my ancestors and from generation to generation.
The mother-in-law remained indifferent, and she said in that indifferent tone: "You value that gold bracelet so much, and I don't see who it is for, but your sister-in-law is the person I love the most." You're not married, what's the use of keeping it? When you get married in the future, I'll buy you a bigger one?"
I have run out of reason, and I just want to vent my anger and grievances fiercely. Tears rolled in my eyes, and I yelled, and fell to my knees, tears finally bursting out of my eyes.
I have lived with my grandparents since I was a child, and my parents have been working in other places all year round and have little time to spend with me. My grandmother always cherished the gold bracelet and regarded it as an ancestral heirloom. She has warned me countless times that this gold bracelet carries the roots of our whole family, has been passed down from generation to generation, and must not be easily lost.
Although my grandmother has passed away long ago, her teachings are etched in my mind. That gold bracelet was not only a piece of precious jewelry, but also the last bit of my concern for my grandmother. It carries my attachment to my family, my desire for my roots, and my awe for my ancestors. I have always cherished it as the most precious thing in my life.
Mother-in-law has always been a traditional elder, and she adheres to the old customs of patriarchal supremacy and male superiority and female inferiority. In her eyes, her son is the pearl of the family, and her daughter is just the daughter-in-law of someone else's family. She dotes on my sister-in-law Sisi even more and regards her as the pearl of her palm.
My mother-in-law was often disappointed in me, she thought that I lacked a sense of tradition and did not respect my ancestors. She has said to me countless times: "A man should shoulder the family incense, why can't you even do this? Although your sister-in-law is a daughter, she is much better than you!"
I know my mother-in-law has good intentions, but her self-contained and opinionated attitude often makes me feel extremely frustrated and angry.
My sister-in-law Sisi has been spoiled by her mother-in-law since she was a child. She is empty-eyed, willful, and does not pay attention to the traditions and rules of her ancestors. She was even more dismissive of the gold bracelet, believing it to be an old object and worthless.
"Brother, do you care so much about that broken gold bracelet? It's better to exchange it for some cash, that's real money!" Sisi once said to me not without sarcasm.
This kind of realization of hers is the side that I hate the most. I cannot tolerate someone so wantonly blaspheming the ancestral teachings and trampling on the ancestral heritage.
"Brother, why are you yelling? just for a gold bracelet?"
Just then, a familiar voice came from the door. I looked up and saw my sister-in-law Sisi standing there with an impatient look on her face.
"Sisi, do you know the weight of that gold bracelet?" I gritted my teeth and said, "That's a treasure handed down from my ancestors, how can I give it away casually?"
"Brother, are you so stubbornly clinging to the old customs?" Sisi glanced at me, "What is there to cherish for that little bit of tatters left by my ancestors? If you want me to say, I should have thrown it away a long time ago, and it is the real skill to exchange some cash!"
Tears welled up in my eyes again, and my heart was like a knife, and I couldn't believe that my loved ones could be so shameless.
"Hmph, I just can't get used to seeing you people, you are all living in ancient times!" Sisi turned a deaf ear to my questioning, she shook the glittering gold bracelet on her wrist, and said arrogantly, "If it weren't for my mother-in-law's gift to me, I wouldn't have been rare for this bad habit of your family!"
My heart shattered completely, like being struck by a merciless sledgehammer. I threw myself on my knees, tears welling up like a river: "Ancestor, why do I have such relatives? Why are your inheritance, your teachings, so desecrated?"
Our mother and son hugged each other and cried, unable to calm down for a long time.
"Ouch, what are you doing here?" At this moment, Sisi spoke ill-intentioned again, "Just for a broken gold bracelet, you guys are too petty, aren't you?"
I looked up and saw Sisi playing with the gold bracelet on her wrist, with an arrogant and arrogant expression. My heart was once again filled with endless anger and disappointment.
"Sisi, don't you respect your ancestors at all?" I choked up and said, "That's the blood of my ancestors, how can you be so ruthless?"
"Respect your ancestors, brother, you're too outdated, aren't you?" Sisi turned a deaf ear to my questioning, and still had a disapproving attitude, "What is there to cherish the little things left by the ancestors? Instead of keeping those rags, it is better to exchange them for money, which is the best choice!"
People are not as good as heaven, I never expected that I would suffer such insults and injuries in the hands of my loved ones. The gold bracelet that carried the ancestral teachings was so desecrated that my heart was falling dripping, and the incomparable disappointment and pain raged in my heart.
"What?" Sisi and I were stunned at the same time, with a look of disbelief.
"That's right," continued the mother-in-law, "the other day I was sorting through my old belongings at home, and I accidentally lost my gold bracelet. At that time, I was very anxious, for fear that you would be sad if you knew it, so I casually made up an excuse and said that it was for Sisi. "
"But mother, why didn't you tell me the truth earlier?" I was finally relieved, and although I still had some regrets in my heart, I finally didn't feel the pain of being betrayed by my loved ones.
"I was afraid you would be too disappointed, so I didn't tell you. The mother-in-law lowered her head and showed a sad expression, "That's an ancestral relic, I know it means a lot to you." That's why I don't want you to know the truth, so that you don't get sad. "
It turned out that this was the case, and it dawned on me that my mother-in-law did not mean to blaspheme the ancestral teachings, but wanted to hide it from me out of good intentions. Looking at her sad appearance, my heart was mixed, with both regret and relief.
"Mother, I'm sorry, I was too impulsive. I stepped forward and hugged my mother-in-law and said sincerely, "I shouldn't have yelled at you like that, you had good intentions, but I misunderstood your original intention." "
"No, it's all my mother-in-law's fault. The mother-in-law said with tears in her eyes, "I shouldn't hide it from you, and I shouldn't make decisions on my own." I should respect you and respect your persistence in the ancestral teachings. "
I turned to Sisi, and she also looked a little confused at this time. I stepped forward and hugged her and said sincerely, "Sisi, I'm sorry, it's my brother who is too impulsive." I shouldn't accuse you like that, you didn't do anything wrong. "
Our family hugged each other and cried, and all the contradictions and misunderstandings were resolved at this moment. The burden on my heart was finally lifted, and in its place was a relief that I had never felt before.
This turmoil made me realize that my mother-in-law represents the adherent of traditional Chinese culture, while I represent more of a seeker of modern independent personality. The contradictions and misunderstandings between us are a collision of traditional and modern concepts in the family.
The mother-in-law has always adhered to the ancestral teachings and believes that men should pass on the family and continue the incense. On the other hand, I pay more attention to personal independence and subjectivity, and do not want to be bound by old habits. This difference in perception has led to estrangement and misunderstanding between us.
Sisi represents a new way of life, she has completely broken away from the shackles of tradition, and has a new understanding and pursuit of modern lifestyle. For her, the significance of ancestral teachings has gradually faded, and money status has taken its place.
This incident made me realize that the contradiction between tradition and modernity is not irreconcilable. As long as we understand and tolerate each other, be honest with each other, and learn with an open mind, we will definitely be able to find a balance between the two.
The root cause of this conflict is precisely because of the lack of sufficient communication and understanding between us. The mother-in-law did not tell us the truth in time, and we became suspicious and suspicious; My accusations against Sisi also lacked basis, leading to her resentment.
If we had been more patient and tolerant, and listened to each other's ideas attentively, instead of resting on our laurels and appreciating ourselves, we would not have caused such misunderstandings. As the saying goes, "Those who know me say I am worried, and those who don't know me say what I want." Lack of communication will lead the two sides to go further and further apart, and eventually fall into the quagmire of contradictions.
This experience made me deeply realize that good communication is inseparable from family, friendship and career. Only by listening attentively to the ideas of others and humbly accepting different voices can we embrace tolerance, resolve differences, and find consensus.
I am determined to correct my self-reliance and self-appreciation, learn to listen more to others, understand others, resolve conflicts through communication, and seek harmony.
After this harrowing episode, our family finally regained their harmonious life. My mother-in-law learned to respect my independent personality and no longer rest on her laurels, but to listen to my ideas with an open mind; Sisi is also aware of the importance of traditional culture, and no longer laughs at the ancestral teachings, but strives to understand its profound connotation.
I have also completely corrected my self-esteem and self-restraint, learned to treat my family with a more open and inclusive attitude, patiently listened to others' ideas, and resolved differences with understanding and communication.
One day, my mother-in-law suddenly took out a jewelry box, and inside it was a brand-new gold bracelet. She said that she specially purchased it in order to make up for her previous mistakes, hoping to replace the lost ancestral heirloom and witness a new beginning for our family.
I looked at my mother-in-law deeply, my eyes full of gratitude. I know that this is not only an ordinary piece of jewelry, but also her understanding and blessing to me. I hugged my mother-in-law and said, "Thank you, mother-in-law." With your understanding, we can really come together as a family. "
In this way, the family regained unprecedented intimacy and harmony, and we cherished each other together, understood and tolerated each other, and worked hard to make family life more fulfilling.
After this harrowing experience, I gained a new understanding of traditional culture. I realized that we should not completely deny the value of traditional culture, but should try to integrate it with modern lifestyles.
Traditional culture contains the crystallization of thousands of years of wisdom of our nation, representing our remembrance and respect for our ancestors. Although some stereotypes and bad habits are no longer out of date, many of these excellent ideological essences are our precious spiritual wealth.
For example, the concept of family, the concept of filial piety, humility and courtesy, etc., are extremely valuable spiritual concepts in the traditional culture of the Chinese nation. We should inherit and carry forward these excellent cultural genes and integrate them with modern lifestyles to meet the development needs of the new era.
I am determined to learn more about traditional Chinese culture in the future, and strive to combine its essence with contemporary lifestyles to achieve a new life realm and values. Only in this way can we truly achieve the integration of tradition and modernity, and let Chinese culture shine with vitality in the new era.
The family is not only a living unit, but also a warm haven, a habitat for our souls. Only in the small world of the family can we truly relax our minds, unload all our guards and burdens, and get close, love, and care to the fullest.
However, a harmonious family is not taken for granted, it requires everyone's joint efforts and maintenance. We must resolve differences with understanding and tolerance, bridge barriers with tolerance and goodwill, and unite strength with love and care. Only in this way can family members truly care for and support each other.
Mother-in-law, wife and Sisi, although each of us has different personalities and pursuits, we are a family after all, and it is the fate of fate that binds us together. I am determined to use more patience and wisdom to maintain a harmonious family, so that it will always be filled with laughter and laughter, and become a safe haven for all of us.
This experience also made me reflect on my own pursuit of life. In the past, I always paid too much attention to the pursuit of the material level, and neglected the spiritual things. But after this grind, I realized that spiritual pursuits are just as important, if not more important than material pursuits.
Money status is important, but after all, it is only one aspect of life. The pursuit of the spiritual level is the foundation that makes our lives more colorful and meaningful. For example, family harmony, adherence to values, inheritance of traditional culture, etc., these are the important factors that truly make life fulfilling.
I am determined to pay more attention to spiritual pursuits in my future life. We must not only strive for the material life, but also strive for the spiritual world, so as to make our lives more colorful and meaningful.
Only when we pursue both material and spiritual aspects can our lives be more complete and complete. I look forward to living an elegant and quality life in the years to come.
In order to better inherit and carry forward the excellent traditional Chinese culture, I began to consciously learn and understand them. I bought a lot of related books, such as "The Analects", "University", "The Mean", etc., hoping to draw wisdom from them.
In addition to book knowledge, I also try to get in touch with some practical activities of traditional culture. For example, every Sunday morning, I would go to a nearby park and join a qigong club to learn about this time-honored traditional health regimen.
There are also some elements of traditional culture in the home, such as we began to put some exquisite purple clay pots, calligraphy and painting works in the living room, creating an antique atmosphere. My wife also bought some silk brocade and hoped to make some home decorations by herself.
Slowly, I found myself developing a deeper understanding and love for traditional culture. The long-standing and profound oriental wisdom has given me a new understanding and understanding of life. I began to use a more inclusive and open mind to appreciate and inherit this precious spiritual wealth.
As my understanding of traditional culture deepened, my family life changed significantly. We began to follow more traditional etiquette of the Chinese nation, such as being dignified, courteous, filial and humble in front of parents and elders.
The way family members get along with each other is also more affectionate and friendly. We often chat, play chess, do housework, help each other, talk and laugh together. My wife and I also cherish each other more and often get tired of being together, like two young people in love.
My mother-in-law is also sincerely happy to see these changes in us. She often said that this was her ideal family life, harmonious and full of family warmth. Sisi is not as willful as before, she has learned to respect her elders and cherish the relationship between her family members more.
In this way, our family's life regained a new meaning and value. The episode of the lost gold bracelet seems to have turned into a beautiful beginning, pushing us towards a more harmonious and traditional way of life.
This experience has also affected my working life. In the past, I always regarded work as my whole life pursuit, and often neglected the needs of family and personal life. But now, I realize the importance of balance and start trying to find a reasonable balance between work and life.