#头条创作挑战赛#
As the saying goes, "The mother is like the vast earth, the father is like the towering tree, and the child is the new sprout." ”
Needless to say, mothers play the role of the cornerstone of a family.
She not only shapes the tone of children's lives, but also carries the hope and development potential of children's future.
What is certain is that whether a child can take advantage in the early stages of life and whether he can achieve something later depends largely on the mother's lifestyle habits and parenting style.
No matter how good the education system is, it is sometimes difficult to replace the influence of a good mother.
Thus, in a family, when children fail to reach their full potential, it is often because of the mother's so-called "poverty habits".
Poor on the lips: like to complain
Lin Huiyin has repeatedly reported that his physical condition is not good, and the source of this illness can be traced back to his childhood, which was invisibly implanted by his mother.
Because her father did not pay enough attention to her mother, her mother moved to live in the backyard with her until her father continued to live.
Lin Huiyin recalled: "In that small backyard, my mother often sighed and repeatedly told me about my ill-fated fate and the cold reception I suffered from my father. She forbade me to play with my brothers and sisters in the front yard and held a grudge against them. ”
Lin Huiyin, who grew up under the influence of this negative environment, is often mired in unfortunate memories of the past. She once said with emotion: "It was my mother's behavior that seemed to push me into the abyss of pain herself, leaving me physically and mentally exhausted and my heart traumatized." ”
In real life, many mothers have developed the habit of complaining in order to relieve their boredom. Although they are wholeheartedly dedicated to their families, they also inadvertently transmit many negative emotions to their families.
However, they may not realize that a mother who habitually complains and is full of negative energy will not only dissipate the well-being of her own hard work, but also cast a shadow on the path of her child's life.
Children are like sensors of their parents' emotions, and they tend to become cautious under the influence of their mother's constant negative emotions.
A mother who is always complaining and resentful will find it difficult to raise a child who is physically and mentally healthy and emotionally positive.
Therefore, as a mother, you should show a model image of facing life positively in front of your children.
A mother with kind words and a constant smile is not only a source of strength for herself to face difficulties, but also a guide to guide her children to love life, which can ignite her child's passion for life.
Giving children a good emotional atmosphere will allow the mother and child to gradually grow into a better version of themselves in the family environment.
Poor anger on the face: only pay attention to face
I know a kid who consistently tops his grade and is known as the "ideal kid next door" in the eyes of others.
However, during an exam due to physical discomfort, her ranking unexpectedly slipped out of the top 10.
Since then, there have often been people around who ask about the child's condition with some kind of "ulterior motive" curiosity.
Although my mother always responded with a smile on her face, after the crowd dispersed, she would express worry and reproach: "You see, this exam is so unsatisfactory that even I feel disgraced when I meet acquaintances." If you don't do well in the test next time, you won't go out for the time being. ”
Under such pressure, the child's performance became more and more unsatisfactory, and despite the continuous efforts, it was difficult to improve his test scores every time, and he never returned to the previous excellent level.
In life, many people value face, especially some mothers are more inclined to regard their children's achievements as their own face capital.
From their academic scores to their future jobs, incomes, marriages, and children, they are consciously or unconsciously comparing themselves with others.
However, "there are people in people, and there are heavens outside the sky", endless comparisons often only lead to unsatisfactory results, as well as endless accusations and disappointments for children.
In fact, what children really need is understanding and encouragement.
Wise mothers know how to respect and protect their children's face, they are good at discovering their children's strengths, giving positive affirmation and encouragement, and taking pride in their children's bright spots.
A child who grows up in an atmosphere of encouragement will have the determination to correct mistakes and the perseverance to face setbacks.
It is precisely because of their parents' recognition and appreciation of their small progress that children can be more clear and firm in their life direction, and finally grow into what we expect them to be.
The Poor of the Heart: Bound by Love
In the work "Strange Tales from Liaozhai", such a story is recorded:
The scholar Wang Wenying married a woman named Crow's Head who was transformed into a fox, and the two conceived a son together, and named him Wang Zi. Although Wang Zi was physically strong and filial to his parents, he had no interest in studying, but was obsessed with martial arts and hunting.
As a mother, Crowhead noticed the stubborn side of Wang Zi's personality and was deeply worried, fearing that if he did not change his stubborn character, he might encounter a major existential crisis in the future.
So, while Wang Zi was asleep, she tied his hands and feet with the heart of her beloved son, regardless of Wang Zi's resistance, and while comforting him that this was for his good, she ruthlessly cut off what she thought was a "difficult tendon" with a thick needle.
Since then, the boy who was originally full of masculinity has become docile and supple, as well-behaved as a girl.
In real life, parents like Crowhead are actually not uncommon.
Many anxious mothers interfere excessively in their children's lives, fearing that they will go astray and worry about the future, so much so that everything from the choice of food, clothing, housing and transportation to the interaction of friends, and even the planning of life are handled by themselves.
However, they may not realize that overprotection is one of the biggest mistakes in educating their children.
Many mothers work hard in the name of love, but the result is often to raise children who are highly dependent and unable to be independent.
As a parent, learning to let go in a timely manner is a crucial lifelong task for the growth of your children.
We should give children enough time and space to practice, experience, and learn to be responsible for themselves.
Unloading the heavy burden of love not only makes parents feel relaxed, but also allows children to release themselves and grow freely.
After all, it is only when the kite is out of the line in its hand that it can fly higher and farther, just as a young eagle can only truly spread its wings and fly high in the sky when it is away from the wings of its parents.
Ancient wisdom once said: "The son of the dragon is also a dragon, the chick of the phoenix is also a phoenix, and the son of a mouse is good at digging." ”
The profound meaning is that the character and characteristics of parents will shape the future of their children to a large extent.
Therefore, as a mother, if you want to raise excellent children, the first task is self-improvement and development.
Because on the long road of education, it is not only the guidance and cultivation of children, but also the sharpening and improvement of their own quality and literacy.
Here, I sincerely wish all parents to lead by example and set a good example in the years to come, so that their children can follow in their excellent footsteps and explore a better self together to meet a more wonderful journey in life.