As children from poor families, why do we feel powerless, and what makes us feel powerless?
The children of poor families need to bring positive benefits to the family with certainty, so what is the positive income? The income minus the cost is called the positive income, so the poor family needs to reduce the cost as much as possible when raising children. The poor have a lower risk tolerance, they are afraid of taking risks, so the more stable the children's lives, the better, the poor raise their children, they generally teach their children how to be diligent and thrifty, how to save;
Because these are the most important virtues, it is not advisable to enjoy life, because anything that is not diligent and economical to enjoy life requires the cost of living, so the poor raise children, you must teach your children to be obedient, you just need to study with your head bored, do not have your own ideas and do not have social activities with other children, because children have any of their own ideas, and social activities with other children, these also require costs, so the poor raise children, will require children to be sensible, will be more supportive of the use of parental authority, and even use violence to control children's behavior;
Because if you don't establish authority and don't use violence, the child is very likely to be spoiled, because raising a spoiled child requires more energy, time and energy from parents, these are costs, so the poor raise children, and believe more in children's temperament and habits, which are all natural, of course, many rich people also think that children's temperament is innate. However, this is also the basis for them to provide different resources and environments for children with different temperaments, and the poor believe that children's temperaments and habits are innate, in order to find a theoretical basis for cutting costs for themselves, anyway, whether their academic performance is good or not, are all innate. As for me, I don't need to do any more investment, other people's children study well, that's because of other people's luck, other people's children are close to their parents, that is also because of other people's luck, give birth to an innocent and sensible child, in my case, because of my bad luck, so, I gave birth to a poor child who is not close to my parents, because the poor cannot afford to take risks, so they will ask the child to take the safest path;
If you want to study, as long as you don't need to pay additional costs, then you can continue to study, but if you finish reading, you need to find a job as stable as possible, you can get married and have children as soon as possible, don't go to me blindly;
Because the longer it drags on, the greater the risk, the poor, he does not believe that people can achieve change and growth through rich experience and experience, in fact, the more experience a person has, the richer his vision, the more ability and experience, and the more he can find his own direction in life, but different experiences also mean costs and risks, and the poor are powerless, or unwilling to bear these costs and risks; Keen to stay in their comfort zone, constantly repeating what they are familiar with, doing so can give them a sense of security, the poor are often less daring, they often do not dare to try risky things, or because they have not been exposed to them before;
So it seems to be a risky thing, and it! Full of resistance to things other than their own understanding, the poor often think that the bold people are brain-dead, and the poor people see this society as static and unchanging, and they prefer this society to be static and unchanged, that is, because only when the society is static and unchanged, the poor are constantly and repeatedly summing up the life experience that has come, it is meaningful, when the poor have to make decisions in unfamiliar areas, they will not try to think independently, but will be more inclined to imitate the practices of other poor people, because this is what they are most familiar with, and say the least costly method, the poorSpecial expectations for their adult children to bring returns to themselves;
Therefore, they pay more attention to the filial piety education of their children, and the poor are more inclined to pass on to their children the concept that it is not easy for parents to raise you, and the grace of parents is greater than heaven, and they are more inclined to control the lives of their children as much as possible, so for the children of poor families, the biggest difficulty they face is the contradiction between world view and values, in contemporary society, most people no longer live in the family unit, small peasant economic system, social relations and their own vision, and are no longer limited to their poor family environment;
Therefore, the contradiction between education and real human nature received since childhood often causes the collapse of world view and values, for example, you have been educated since childhood is diligent and thrifty, and it is a waste of virtue to make mistakes, but when you grow up, you will find that in fact, everyone wants to live a good life, and the desire to eat and dress well and use these things is human nature, then at this time, you will be very easy to fall into contradictions and entanglements, even if you have the conditions of life now, you will feel that you are making mistakes when you enjoy life;
It is also possible that after adulthood, you think that you were deceived when you were a child, but instead start to consume with revenge, whether you are desperately earning money or squandering money, it is difficult for you to be rational again, then for example, you have been educated since childhood to be obedient, and you can live a good life by hard work, and when you grow up and record the society, you find that obedient people must be the worst to be pitted, and people who work hard must be stripped the worst, no one can live a good life by being obedient and working hard, but with your level of understanding of society, you can't find a reasonable explanation;
So, either your moral lower limit is getting lower and lower, or you criticize everyone who is better off than you, for example, you have been taught not to take risks, not to do things that you have not done, not to think independently, then in adulthood, you will quickly lose the ability to explore the unknown territory by yourself, your cognition of the unknown territory;
can only rely on the second-hand information brought to you by authority, on the one hand, you will no longer trust authority, because after all, you have been deceived by authority many times, on the other hand, you have to close those forwarded articles, for example, you have no other ability to understand information, for example, the education you have received since childhood is that the grace of parents is greater than the sky, and children must repay their parents;
Then when you become an adult, you have a great possibility to squeeze your parents, buy yourself a car and buy a house, because the grace of your parents is greater than the sky, is what they say, then it is also possible to squeeze your wife and daughter-in-law, to take care of your family, no matter how you choose, your own family relationship will be a mess, that is, because you have only seen the return on investment, because this will inevitably lead to a family relationship that oppresses each other;
Finally, I want to say that if you don't know enough, please do everything you can to make up for your cognition, don't dare to try and make mistakes, and make more money by working more if you're wrong, so as to have a better way out in the future and make preparations.
