If you don't regret your life, if you don't have a child, you can't support the elderly, and if you don't have children, you will come to the world for nothing. How often do you hear your parents say these familiar words?
If your daughter is married and doesn't have children, there will still be nagging, so your parents will relay other people's nagging to you, and those nagging people will become their support group.
The ages are different, the way of living is different, the ideological collision of the two generations is not in the same latitude, and the generation gap in the concept of fertility is naturally different.
At least to be able to use these as capital studs for their own short life, or to let themselves enjoy a high quality of life in a limited time, this is the real idea of the Dink family.
Why does the state worry about such a private issue as marriage and childbirth? On the surface, it seems to be a gender issue, but in fact it is a big issue that is closely linked to the population and the economy.
In the past, it was, but now it is to let go of the second and third children, as long as you are born, there will be relevant subsidies, but everyone is still not interested, is it disgusted that the subsidies are less? Obviously not. Most people face life that is nothing more than two,
There is a saying called "self-elimination of genes". Giving birth to a baby seems to be a common thing, but it does affect the country's economic development, so having a baby is also a state affair.
The reluctance to have children means that young people refuse to transition to parenthood. Great strides have been made in social development, and young people have become more educated, and their views on life are different from those of their predecessors.
I like the movie "Temporary Cohabitation" starring Zhang Jiahui very much, the heroine said, "Anyone can love anyone,,, what I care about is the results, what I want is a sense of responsibility, whether you can support your family, these are love!"
In the past, the old concept that having children is not for yourself, nor for the elders, but for the inheritance of the family's incense, you can understand why there are arranged marriages and blind dates, why there are patriarchal and family pairs. A daughter who marries out is like water spilled out, and only the eldest son can inherit the whole family.
The fusion of Western thinking and Chinese ideas makes the following:
It's like the children of the grandparents' brothers and sisters, that is, the cousins of the parents, almost don't get along with each other except for the New Year, everyone is busy with life, not to mention our third-generation children, who don't know who is who after a fight.
When I return to the village for the New Year, I see other peers calling me brothers, only I can't fit in, and I may also find other people who are isolated, and the concept of big family makes our new generation of young people seem out of place, this is strangers with blood relations.
The current situation of most people, extreme poverty is far from being rich, and many people attribute this problem to "high housing prices". However, in the seventies and eighties of the last century, Singapore implemented the "HDB flat" system, and now the house-price-to-income ratio is as low as that.
It has also been implemented that about 38,000 yuan will be paid directly for one child and two children, and there will be more for three and four children, and there will be a two-child family. What a good condition this is, but young people in Singapore still don't want to have children, why is that?
In recent years, the birth rate in the East Asian region, which is deeply influenced by Confucian culture and follows the principle of "no filial piety has three, and no queen is the greatest", has entered an era of negative growth, and the economically developed countries and regions of Japan, South Korea, Hong Kong and Taiwan are not as economically pressured as the young people in our mainland, but their young people still choose not to have children.
In Japan, there was a Buddhist family of "three noes", that is, not falling in love, not getting married, and not having children. Then South Korea followed closely behind, and the birth rate was even worse, and when it came to us, there were even "lying flat", "rotten", and "gnawing the old".
The novelist Milan Kundera once said "". Dare to ask young people, are you happy? People are emotional animals, young people are kind in their hearts, they know that they can't prove it, of course they refuse to have children, and they don't want their children to live like themselves.
There will be many choices in life, which can be big or small, and when faced with a choice, the costs and benefits will be weighed by selfish desires, and this is still the case with having children.
And the benefits after having a child are nothing more than that, similar to raising cats and dogs, this emotional happiness is valuable. People often say that raising children to prevent old age is also a kind of benefit, and this benefit depends on whether the child's "filial piety" will be returned to the parents, which is unequal and unequivalent.
Looking at the genealogy chart of the past dynasties, a more appropriate sentence says, that is, what modern people say. The succession of the family has always been the descendant of the nobility, because most of the commoners died of famine, war, or forced labor and taxation before they had children.
The continuation and development of the descendants of the entire human civilization has never been a linear expansion, but a continuous overflow from the top. From the perspective of social responsibility, the current thinking of young people is, if you don't give birth to me, what does social development have to do with me? For rich people, it is not a matter of having three children in four years, and they all have high-quality children.
The ancients said that people are prosperous and have many children, because the benefits of having children are very large, but the cost is very small. Raising a child does not cost money and time, just feed the mouth, the older child can take care of the younger siblings, and at the age of seven or eight he can go to the field to help his parents work.
For example, if a parent has a piece of land, the children are the productive labor force, and if they have more children, they can cultivate more wasteland and grow more food. When the parents pass away, the children can inherit the inheritance, get back the exploited labor income at one time, and complete the cycle of "inheritance".
In the industrial society, this cycle is not very well-informed, with the development of urbanization, to encourage farmers to go to the city, but the cost of having children is too high, so that they dare not have more children, afraid that they will not be able to afford it.
The boss will only pay wages after taking most of the labor value, and the children will take a part of the wages to be filial to their parents, and sometimes the children themselves are not enough, and they need their parents to help.
According to the data of the 2023 Bureau of Statistics, it is taken away from our labor by enterprises, of course, this belongs to the appreciation of corporate profits. Industrialization has accelerated the efficiency of the exploitation of capital, seriously reduced the return on childbirth of the parents of laborers, and greatly reduced the willingness to have children, and no country can escape this iron law.
People who are destitute will fall into anxiety when they see that their peers around them have bought houses, married, and had children, how can you afford to pay off the mortgage, run a family, and raise children?
Many people's life decisions are determined by the pressure of their parents, the stereotypes of morality, and the imitation of others after anxiety, and they themselves are aware of what they want and what kind of life they want to live.
Getting married and having children is not a bad thing in itself, nor is it a good thing, but please don't rush to deny and refute, it is just a choice in your life, think clearly before making a decision. When you are not financially independent, your personality is not independent, you can't even handle your own emotions well, and you are a negative number and full of difficulties, forcing others to form a family will only bring others into a greater impasse.
Drifting with the crowd can only make you poorer, and people can only be mediocre. There are so many people who buy a house, get married, and have a baby, few can live their lives well, few can make money, and few can raise their children well, how to wake you up?
Raising children is indeed the best way to break all kinds of boredom for ordinary people, and of course, it is also a long-term companionship.
Everyone has their own way of life, there is no right or wrong to have children or not, only the environment is suitable and not suitable, as long as you live well, there is no need to pay attention to the eyes of others, others cannot make decisions on your behalf, and others will not care whether you live or die.
Someone, I don't want to have children in the future. She asked her lawyer a question, what would happen to her inheritance if she had an accident or a hundred years from now? Because her aunt said at her grandson's wedding ceremony that her inheritance would be inherited by her grandson, which made her feel very disgusted, and she didn't want her relatives to lose their money.
The lawyer gave her two suggestions. Money is a thing that everyone likes, not only relatives, but even strangers will be worried about this huge inheritance, and the people who are most likely to hate are actually the people around them, and they are often acquaintances who can hurt you.
In the final analysis, how to improve the problem of young people not having children, I am afraid that it is necessary to effectively control the exploitation of capital, appropriately adjust and reduce the pressure on young people's lives, so that everyone can be full of hope for the future at work, common prosperity and improve the quality of life, so that young men and women will be willing to have children.
What do you think about having children or not?