Previously, on Douyin, a video with nearly one million likes caused a lot of controversy and thinking.
The blogger said in the video:
"When you reach middle age, do you think death is far away from us? Just yesterday, I attended the funeral of a college classmate......
The deceased and her were college classmates, and not long ago, they were still singing together, and the song they sang at that time was Liu Ruoying's "Later", and the picture of the party is vivid.
At the funeral, the moment her classmate was pushed to be cremated, the classmate's mother pounced on the body, constantly shouting "my daughter", and there were bursts of heart-rending cries, which moved many people.
The departure of her peers instantly gave her a sense of self-endangerment and a sense of pathos for the departure of her friends.
However, this emotion did not last long before it was replaced by another.
Because, everyone's attitude towards the death of her former classmate and friend made her feel cold.
As soon as the funeral ended, in the underground parking lot of the funeral home, a lively news sounded in the WeChat group of classmates.
Everyone laughed and laughed in the group to discuss where to eat and where the food was delicious......
They joked in the group, as if they didn't remember that one of them had left this world forever.
Inside the door of the funeral home, heaven and man are eternally separated, and they are grief-stricken; Outside the door, it is to invite friends and friends, laughing and playing.
This huge contrast only makes people feel realistic and cruel.
It turns out that your life and death may be nothing more than a bustle in the eyes of others;
It turns out that some of the "liveliness" in this world will not die out because of your departure;
It turns out that in the eyes of others, you are not that important.
Under this video, there are more than 50,000 comments.
Many netizens feel that although this story is really cruel, it is also true enough.
Behind these messages, there are warm and cold human affairs.
We've all been there.
You experienced life and death there, and a lot of things happened to you, but your experience is just a talk from other people's mouths, and it is your family that really cares about you and is exhausted because of you.
You always feel like you're important, and you wouldn't be able to sit without the party.
But in the end, you realize that whether you are there or not, it doesn't affect the happiness of others.
When we are young, we always want to pursue those worldly prosperity, lively friends, and endless drinking parties......
But when people reach middle age, we finally understand that there is no point in having some chasing.
Life doesn't need so much nihilistic excitement and so-called "friends", we should focus more time on more important things.
Two or three confidants, family members by the side, and good health are the best state in life.
I saw a news item on the Internet before, which made people feel a chill down their spines.
A girl in Hainan went to a friend's wedding party as a bridesmaid.
At the party, in order to save face for her friends and to liven up the atmosphere, she drank glass after glass in the face of other people's persuasions.
While she was "booze", her friends burst into enthusiastic cheers and applause.
However, tragedy struck.
After drinking too much liquor, her face turned purple and her breath was short.
Later, when the girl was taken to the hospital, her heart had stopped beating, and the young girl was gone.
Her relatives were grief-stricken, and the white-haired man sent the black-haired man, but the friends who poured her wine did not feel any guilt.
The family was so angry that they filed a complaint with the court, but when it came time to pursue responsibility, these friends threw the blame at each other, and they were vague, and none of them apologized and took responsibility.
This story is embarrassing to watch.
When you drink, you're all brothers, and if something happens, you'll see it all thoroughly.
Sometimes, the adult world is just so realistic.
If you think about it, do those drinking games that make you get drunk really make sense?
Will those who need your flattery really help you in times of difficulty?
Is it really necessary to spend a lot of time catering to those lively groups of friends?
However, the truth is that we spend a lot of energy and time maintaining these relationships, and in the end, we get very little.
In recent years, I have rarely attended so-called parties and socializing.
It's not that I'm indifferent, but because I think time should be spent on people and things that are more worthwhile.
After the age of 30, I can clearly feel the passage of time.
Parents are getting older, children are growing up rapidly, their health is not as good as before, and the tasks on their shoulders are still very heavy.
We have long passed the childish period of hollowing out our bodies to prove righteousness and wasting our energy to maintain our feelings.
When we reach middle age, we gradually understand what is meaningless and what is the most important.
Late-night carnival, it is better to sleep peacefully;
It is better to make friends forcibly than to polish yourself and improve your business;
Drinking and bragging with fox friends and dog friends, it is better to have a quiet meal with the family......
Only by knowing how to eliminate and give up can we better help us move towards the next journey in life.
I once watched a movie called "Akita", the English name of the movie is "The Fall", which divides life into four seasons, and middle age is the season that is about to enter autumn.
But "The Fall" also means to fall in English.
When you reach middle age, it is like a falling process, there are too many things that will involve your energy, and too many chores will disturb your heartstrings.
And what we have to do is focus and focus on the more important things.
I like the theory that your relationship with the world is the relationship you cut off from the world.
In the adult world, there are so many things that we need to cut.
For example, in our relationship with material things, do we really need so many external material things to feel happy?
For example, in our relationships, do we really need to have so many friends to feel truly happy?
Only after cutting, only after breaking off, will we not have so many desires and fatigue on our bodies, and will we have more energy and a better attitude to face more important things.
Source: Visual China
Reporter Yan Junjie has attended many dinners and socialized a lot before, until he was sick and hospitalized and brushed shoulders with death, so he began to re-examine everything.
In "Born to Die: A Journalist's Days in the Hospital," he wrote:
Life is more fragile than we imagined, and at the critical point of death, I have been chagrined and regretted:
I thought that the next day, I must go to the site to pick up Douban (the child) and go home, and have a good chat with him on the way home.
I thought that the next day, I would have to go home and tell Douding (the child) a story and spend a pleasant evening with him.
Thinking that when I was discharged from the hospital, I would definitely pick up the gym workouts.
Thinking that when I was discharged from the hospital, I would quit milk tea, alcohol, staying up late, and all bad habits......
Later, under the treatment of doctors, his physical indicators slowly returned to normal.
When he didn't get injections, he started to walk with his wife, and suddenly found those beautiful things that he had never noticed before:
The plane trees on Jingzhou Street are tall and straight. The leaves are mottled, and they are very beautiful.
On Nanhu Square, there are many old people flying kites, and the kites in the sky fly too high, and only a small black dot can be seen.
When children get off the school bus, they often have to stand on the side of the road and watch the excavator under construction for a while before they are willing to go home happily.
slowed down the pace, only to discover the small beauty of life.
In the past, we were always in a hurry and neglected the most important things, but when we look back, we realize that the true happiness in life is actually very simple.
The ideal life is actually good to have three things: a clean circle, a regular life, and a warm family.
In Walden, Thoreau says:
I am willing to go deep into life, suck the marrow of life, live a solid and simple life, and remove everything that does not belong to life cleanly.
Live in its most basic form, simple, simple, and simple.
Two or three confidants and friends are worth thousands of general friends.
A truly mature person knows how to eliminate, to do subtraction, to know what is most important and what is not important, and then to focus a lot of energy on important things, to be a quiet and profound person.
Someone once asked Rodin, the master sculptor, "What is the mystery of art?"
Without hesitation, he replied: "Subtract the excess." ”
This is true of art, and even more so of our lives.
May you and I be able to live a life of subtraction.
Author: Mr. Table. Source: Table View of Life (ID: zzdshg). The picture in this article comes from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact to delete.