As the saying goes, "Sickness comes from the mouth, and disaster comes from the mouth." ”
If you eat indiscriminately, you will get sick easily. If you talk nonsense, you will easily offend people and cause great trouble. Many bad things in life are caused by "not being able to speak".
Here's an example. It's someone else's secret, you shouldn't have said it, but you said it anyway. When your words reach the ears of others, believe that others will hate you and see you as an enemy.
If you don't understand, I just treat his affairs as an after-dinner conversation, so why do you offend people? Because you trample on other people's bottom line.
People in the rivers and lakes are like this. What you think is innocuous is important to others. What you think you can say casually, others can't say.
When you go out, you say these kinds of things when you meet people, which is actually a manifestation of "low emotional intelligence".
First, seeing through and saying through is a proper low emotional intelligence.
You know the truth about something, so is it better for you to say it, or is it better not to say it at all? My advice is, try not to say it.
Smart people can basically see the truth of the matter at a glance, whether you say it or not, smart people know it. And the fool, even if you tell the truth, others will not believe you and will accuse you. So, why do you have to say?
In addition, seeing through and saying through will offend the interests of some people. From ancient times to the present, it is all moving interests such as killing parents, do you think others will let go of you who see through and say it?
Just like Yang Xiu in the late Eastern Han Dynasty, he told all Cao Cao's thoughts and let his colleagues know, then Cao Cao couldn't tolerate Yang Xiu, so he could only kill him.
Seeing through it means that this person has a high IQ. And to say it, it shows that this person's emotional intelligence is very low. They don't know that in a humane society, they are all "shooting the first bird", and whoever stands out will be unlucky.
There are many things in reality that we can see through, but we can't say so. If you don't say it, you may be protecting yourself.
Second, always digging out your heart and lungs with others, it is proper to have no emotional intelligence.
There is a poem: "I would have turned my heart to the bright moon, but the bright moon shines on the ditch." ”
You treat others with all your heart and heart, but others think you are stupid and naïve, and they will bully you and pinch you. It is destined that your sincerity will be fed to the dog.
After mixing in the rivers and lakes for a long time, you will understand what you have done and what secrets you have, if you can not tell it, don't say it, and don't let others know.
If you don't know about it, others will think you are mysterious and will respect you. If you are completely penetrated by others, others will think that you have no sense of mystery, and they will become more and more disrespectful to you. In this way, don't you suffer?
Especially honest people, they say a lot of things when they meet people, and they can't wait to completely dig out their hearts. This is actually a lack of emotional intelligence, and I don't understand the sinister nature of "the way of the world and the hearts of the people".
The so-called "only three points of speech, dare not throw away a piece of heart". Some truths, just say three points. The remaining seven points of truth are best rotten in the bottom of your heart and used to protect yourself.
3. Always going straight and lacking the wisdom of Tai Chi is proper and has no emotional intelligence.
There is a famous saying in "Zengguang Xianwen": "Don't say anything when you hear something, don't know what to ask about, don't worry about idle things, and return early if you have nothing to do." ”
Meaning, don't say anything you hear. If someone asks you anything, you have to answer that you don't know. Don't worry too much about it. If it's okay, then go home early.
Many people don't understand, why do they say "I don't know"? Just to leave room for themselves and leave a way out. If you say everything, it will be tantamount to making enemies everywhere, and the result will be tragic.
What the society pays attention to is always "playing Tai Chi". You look at all kinds of business tycoons, as well as elites, which one is not good at Tai Chi?
To put it mildly, in a humane society, if you don't know how to play Tai Chi, you can't become an elite, and you may be killed halfway. If you know how to do Tai Chi, you may not be able to become an elite. If you don't know how to do Tai Chi, you will definitely not be able to become an elite.
As Professor Zeng Shiqiang said, "If you have something to say, you will die faster". For things that shouldn't be said, try to answer "I don't know", or play the ball or Tai Chi, so that you may have the last laugh.
Fourth, being excessively high-profile, showing off, and showing off is a proper low emotional intelligence.
Anyone who works in the internet industry knows it. An ordinary person, if he becomes popular on the Internet overnight, then in two days, he will be picked up by someone and will directly burst into stink.
In the circle of friends, if you talk about how much money you make, how many houses and cars you have, then you will be recorded and posted on the Internet, thus saying that you are unscrupulous and unkind to the rich.
Get along with relatives around you, you say how nourishing your life is, I believe that these relatives will sing you down everywhere, saying that you are not good here, not good there, have no virtue, and sooner or later you will be unlucky.
These things all have one thing in common - they are not good. Whoever is too high-profile, who stands out from the crowd, and who is better than others, is the object of hatred of others. Otherwise, "laughing at others, hating others" will not become the norm.
As "Dream of Red Mansions" said, "If you are too high, people are jealous, and you are suspicious of the clean world". If your words and deeds are too prominent, others will be jealous of you and hate you. If you are too noble, someone will splash you with dirty water and stink you.
The so-called "if you want to add sin, there is no excuse". No matter how great your ability is, you must keep a low profile, and don't use your kindness to test complex human nature.