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Maka Lenko once said, "We should be good at love, and we should know how to love." When we deal with interpersonal relationships, we should be conscious, healthy, and responsible for ourselves, so that we will not perform tragedy. ”
In real life, how many people can really understand the problem?
Many people have to take some tortuous paths and suffer the pain of failure because they fail to understand human relationships. However, this can be avoided. By simply understanding the relationships between people, you can successfully circumvent these problems.
As long as you can clearly distinguish who is worth befriending and who is not, you can live a more relaxed life.
The saddest thing about people is that they can't tell who is genuine about them and who is just playing on the spot. This will cause your sincere efforts to become meaningless, and it will also cause others to be truly cruel and disappointed. Therefore, we must look at our relationships more sensibly, so as not to be hurt when we seek our true heart.
When we are young, we often can't tell right from wrong and good from bad, which is understandable. After all, our experience is very shallow, and we have not experienced much life experience.
If you still can't tell right from wrong in middle age, then if you can't be happy, the responsibility can only be attributed to yourself.
When you are over 50 years old, regardless of whether you are in a good or bad situation, you should disown yourself from the following two types of relatives, even if you are related to them. This is because these relatives have no good intentions towards you and will consume your time, take advantage of you, and even hurt you.
One: ungrateful relatives who don't know how to be grateful at all
In life, you may meet those ungrateful relatives who have no real care and concern for you, and will only show up when you need help, and once they are useless, they will leave you mercilessly. This kind of behavior is immoral, and I hope we can all cherish the mutual love and support between family members.
One day in the future, if you need help, he may ignore you altogether, even if you have helped him in the past. At this point, he may not care about any friendship.
It is necessary to keep a distance from such relatives. Because no one's sincerity can be easily obtained, if you put in the energy for a long time and don't get a response, you will definitely become exhausted.
It is recommended that you do not borrow money from relatives unless you have to. Once you do, you may face a steady stream of troubles. In this regard, I would like to remind you to carefully consider your financial situation and borrowing options. In this way, unnecessary disputes and relationship breakdowns can be avoided.
If it is a very strange relative, then the relationship between you may not be too deep. In such a situation, it is difficult for others to understand your predicament and be unable to sympathize with you and offer help.
In life, some people may reject your request outright. Not only will you not be able to get help, but you will also owe the other party a favor. And some people may use your affairs as an after-dinner conversation and don't care about your feelings. We must learn to be a kind and sincere person, not only to get help from others, but also to gain their trust and respect.
Even relatives who are a little more distant won't necessarily lend you money or even cause you some trouble, but you don't have to worry too much about these things.
We need to understand that dignity is given to us, and humiliation and unhappiness are usually caused by ourselves. This is a universal truth.
Borrowing money is a sensitive matter and should not be used as collateral for family affection. We should avoid overestimating the other party's financial resources, and we should not ignore their life pressures. At the same time, don't think too highly of yourself and think that your status in the other person's heart is higher than the actual situation. Remember, only children can give up their hearts and minds for the sake of family and friends. Let's be sane and calm when borrowing money.
If you have a calm mind, there will be nothing to be angry about.
Even if you get the best result, which is that a relative lends you money, you still can't pay off the debt. It's not just because you're getting real money, but also because you can't measure it. Even though the borrower is your relative, you also need to keep this debt in mind at all times and do your best to repay it.
Debts in terms of favors have always been the most difficult to repay, especially for relatives who are not very familiar with each other. Even if you pay off your debts, you will feel embarrassed every time you see this relative.
We should refrain from borrowing money from anyone unless we have to. Try to use a formal but relaxed expression.
Two: too snobbish, too high-stepping, too selfish and hypocritical relatives
In addition to those relatives who do not know how to be grateful are not worthy of associating with them, we should also avoid distancing ourselves from relatives who are too status-oriented and like to belittle others. As ordinary people, we should cherish gratitude and an attitude of mutual respect, which is the cornerstone of building family relationships.
People usually have a selfish and hypocritical nature. When you are in your glory, they will do everything they can to get away with you, and they will not hesitate to walk away from you when you need help. This is because they only value the benefits you bring.
Sometimes people say that it only takes one difficult time to know how many people around you really care about you.
There is a good example around me, my friend Mr. Zhang used to be very successful in business and made a lot of money. During that time, he had smooth sailing and was surrounded by many people, including relatives from his hometown. This is a very typical case of how long as you do your own thing, success will follow.
Those relatives didn't really treat him well, and most of them came to him for help, so they came to visit him with some gifts. This condition was common among his relatives, who did not really care and love him.
Mr. Zhang has always been an open-minded person, he didn't think much about it at that time, as long as the other party has needs, he will always try his best to help.
At first, I thought that my efforts would be treated with sincerity. But then his company did not run well and eventually went bankrupt, and since then, they have disappeared without a trace.
When Mr. Zhang asked for their help, they all found all kinds of excuses to shirk and were unwilling to lend a hand, which brought great trouble to Mr. Zhang.
At that moment, he suddenly realized that some people really pay attention to fame and fortune, and the sincerity he paid was really not worth mentioning.
In addition to our own kindness and affection, another reason is that we feel that our relatives should help each other.
There are times in our lives when we need help, and it's inevitable. If we can help others now, there may be someone to help us in the future. This is how mutual aid relationships are built between people. Life's ups and downs are inevitable, but we can build stronger social bonds by helping each other.
Some people don't know how to empathize, they only look at the profits, and they leave you when you become useless.
After middle age, no matter how we live, we need to stay away from some people so as not to be harmed by them. This is an important measure for us to protect ourselves, to be wiser and more mature.