Smile, ten years less.
公子厮打
The instructor's son and the main boy's son fought, and the instructor's son couldn't beat each time, so he went home and said to the instructor, "I don't know what that kid eats, and he has a lot of strength."
After the instructor heard this, he quietly inquired and learned that the main Bo's family ate meat every day. When he returned home, he said to his son, "Don't be busy, just wait for the sacrifice to be over, and then go and fight him."
Sacrifice to Ding, every year in February and August of the first Ding day of the lunar calendar to worship Confucius, also known as Ding sacrifice.
Go to the toilet
An apprentice wants to go to the toilet and asks his husband: Does the gentleman want to go to the toilet?
The gentleman said, "I mean that too, so you can go first."
When the apprentice came to the toilet, he found that there was already someone inside, so he hurried back. The gentleman asked him, "Why did you come back so soon?"
The apprentice replied: There is another interesting man in it.
nap
Mr. Yi dozed off during the day, and when he woke up, he said to the student: I went to see Zhou Gong just now.
The next day, the student also dozed off, and when the gentleman saw it, he knocked the student awake with a ruler and rebuked, "How can you do this?"
The student said, "I went to see Zhou Gong just now."
Mr. asked: What did Zhou Gong tell you?
Student answers: Zhou Gong said that he did not meet your teacher yesterday.
This student is a bit skinny.
again
Zai Yu dozed off during the day, Confucius was very angry, scolded him for rotten wood, dung, Zai Yu was not convinced, and said: I want to go to see Zhou Gong, why do you want to scold me?
Confucius said: How can the day be the time to dream of Zhou Gong.
Zai Yu replied: But Zhou Gong is not a person who is willing to come at night.
again
Mr. Yi likes to take a nap, so the student asked him how to explain the words "Zai Yu day sleep".
The gentleman replied, "Whoever kills, kills, I am, whoever gives, I am, whoever sleeps, sleeps."
The student asked, "What does it mean to string the four words together?"
The gentleman replied, "Even if you kill me, you will take a nap at noon."
Read the typos
When Mr. Enlightenment taught, he first started teaching from "University", and when he read the sentence "Yu Xi, the former king does not forget", he actually read the pronunciation according to the word, and the host listened to it and hurriedly said: Wrong, wrong, should read 'woohoo'. Mr. Teach listened to the advice of the host's family.
In the winter, when he read the Analects of the Analects, which is close to the opera, he read the opera as a woo hoo, and the host listened to it and said: Wrong, wrong, it should be read as a drama here.
Mr. Teaching was very annoyed when he heard this, and he said to his friend: This owner is really difficult to serve, only the word 'play', and he has been fighting with me from the beginning of the year to the end of the year.
again
There is a host who hires a Mr. Mengxue with a salary of a few stones of rice, and the host and the husband agree that if they read a different word, they will be fined one liter of rice.
When it was time to disperse, a count showed that after deducting the mispronounced rice, there were only two liters of rice left.
The host took out the rice and put it on the table, and the teacher was disappointed, looked at the rice on the table, and couldn't help but say: It's He Yanxing ('and' is mispronounced as 'Xing')!
When the master heard this, he said to the boy beside him, "Well, take these two liters of rice into the house together."
Essay
When someone's mother-in-law passed away, he went to a private school teacher and asked him to write a memorial message.
Mr. Private School found a memorial text from an ancient book and copied it, but he copied it by mistake and copied it to his wife.
The owner was angry and blamed him for why he scribbled.
Mr. Private School said: It's strange, this sacrificial text was set in ancient times, how can it be wrong, I'm afraid that your family has died the wrong person.
I don't know if this private school gentleman will be beaten into a pig's head.
屎字
A student asked Mr. "How to write the word".
The gentleman couldn't think of it for a while, so he said: It's clearly on his lips, and he can't say it for a while.
(Image source: Internet, invasion and deletion)