Written by / First Psychology Writers
Editor / Tommy
Traditionally, collectivism has always been important, which has led to blurring the boundaries between them and friends and family during social activities, such as "walking the streets".
With the progress of society, modern people have begun to pay attention to personal space, and gradually enhance the sense of distance between each other.
As a result, the intimacy of "kinship" relationships has also changed, and the way they interact with each other has also changed, which requires the elderly to learn how to live more harmoniously with others.
In the past, especially those born in the 60s and 70s, they were accustomed to maintaining closer ties with others at a young age, often visiting friends and families after dinner.
But in the 21st century, this phenomenon has changed significantly, and the younger generation is more inclined to maintain certain personal boundaries.
Many open-minded older people have also come to accept this more detached way of getting along, and they don't want to be overly disturbed, and they don't like others to be vexatious or overly emotional.
This change in interpersonal relationships means that we also need to learn to keep a moderate distance after entering old age, and when people reach their old age, when visiting the door, we must do "five do not bring".
Not only does this make interpersonal relationships more harmonious, but it also helps to reduce possible conflicts and ensure that we are not criticized or blamed by others for etiquette issues in middle age and beyond.
1. Don't bring "bear children"
In today's world, where the phenomenon of "intergenerational parenting" is common, many young parents who are busy with work have handed over the burden of childcare to their grandparents.
Older people who bring their children to visit friends when they are bored should be aware that children may behave inappropriately due to a lack of mature behavioral awareness.
Children may inadvertently disturb the order in the owner's home, which can objectively cause embarrassment or misunderstanding.
Even if your child is interested in something appealing, teach them to only touch it if they are allowed to do so.
2. No emotional pressure
Personal emotions should be handled by oneself, and while sharing them with those close to you can reduce the burden, others are not obligated to share them.
The "butterfly effect" of psychology also reminds us that individual emotions can affect others.
Therefore, when visiting other people's homes, you should try to control your emotions and avoid causing unnecessary burdens to others.
3. There are no personal standard requirements
Many elderly people are accustomed to pointing fingers at their children at home, which is particularly inappropriate in front of outsiders.
Being picky about the decoration or furniture of another person's home can not only make the other person feel uncomfortable, but it can also hurt each other's feelings.
Everyone has their own life choices and aesthetic standards, and even if they don't fit their preferences, they should be respectful and avoid unnecessary criticism.
Fourth, do not bring useless gifts
In today's society, gift-giving has become an art, focusing on giving the other person what they really need.
If you just send something that is not very useful, it is likely to be a burden on the recipient.
While bringing a gift with you during a visit is a way to show respect, the choice of gift should not be arbitrary, it must be carefully considered and selected according to the actual needs of the other person, so that such a gift can really bring people closer together.
In the psychology of interpersonal interaction, there is a point of view that
It is believed that most interpersonal relationships are built on the principle of mutual benefit.
This also explains why maintaining a relationship requires mutual giving and acceptance, and although this interaction can be tiring at times, it is necessary to maintain the relationship.
5. Do not visit unannounced
For middle-aged and older people, the boundaries between people are blurred at an age when casual visits to neighbors are the norm.
However, people in modern society value personal space more, and unexpectedly visiting someone without an appointment can cause a lot of stress and disrupt their daily routine.
Therefore, it is especially important to make appointments and notices in advance.
In contemporary times, both young and old tend to appreciate those who know how to be polite and measured.
The true meaning of politeness lies in its ability to be applied universally to all kinds of relationships as a basic norm of interpersonal communication.
With such a foundation, our society can be more civilized and harmonious, and future generations will learn better social etiquette.
When people retire, they gradually withdraw from the world of work and begin to value their personal "private space", which becomes the core of their lives.
After having your own space, you also need to respect the private sphere of others.
This applies not only to the behavior of the guest, but also to the principle that must be observed in all interpersonal interactions, so that the relationship can be more harmonious and effectively maintained.
-The End -
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
Keywords: interpersonal communication, psychology
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