There is a passage in the famous American marriage and love book "The Meaning of Marriage":
We never know our spouse, we just know that even if we find the right person in the first place, it won't be long before he changes.
The deep meaning hidden behind this passage is that many people only realize it after suffering derailment and betrayal, and they have a painful understanding.
Especially for some cunning men, after they have an affair outside of marriage, they will use some more deceptive behaviors to deceive their wives and bring more harm to their wives.
Women must be vigilant.
One
Surprisingly good for you
If it weren't for the conclusive evidence and the real hammer, Zhou Hui wouldn't believe that the man had betrayed him at all.
Even if the evidence is vivid, there are still countless times, Zhou Hui overturned the truth of the man's cheating and betrayal in her heart.
Because before this, the man was so good to Zhou Hui, so good that Zhou Hui felt that after ten years of marriage, the man was finally sensible, and he finally got out.
The man has a rough personality, a bit machismo, and he doesn't know how to feel sorry for people, and he has all the shortcomings of a straight man in science and engineering, so after getting married, Zhou Hui lived a hard life for a long time. In her own words, she is in this family, taking care of a younger son and an older son.
And the man is the eldest son in Zhou Hui's mouth.
But I don't know when men began to change. When I go home, I will take the initiative to accompany my children, take the initiative to help with housework, and even cook brown sugar water carefully and considerately when Zhou Hui is in her menstrual period.
This change is simply a surprise for Zhou Hui. She said to her girlfriends countless times:
The iron tree will bloom, and the straight man will also open his mind, although the man matures late, but when he matures, he will still know how to be considerate.
It's just that what Zhou Hui didn't expect was that the man's thoughtfulness and warmth were just because of a compensatory mentality.
He has someone outside of marriage, and after having a strong affection with his lover outside of marriage, going home and being more kind to Zhou Hui can eliminate the guilt in his heart.
Two
Not critical of you, extra accommodating to you
For a while, Wang Min also felt that her husband had matured a lot. The relationship between husband and wife has also been much more harmonious as a result.
The man is six years older than Wang Min, has a higher education than Wang Min, and has a vague desire to control, so after getting married, men will be critical of Wang Min's life, from career development to daily details.
For this reason, Wang Min often quarrels with men. Wang Min said to men countless times:
Living together is about enabling each other to be themselves, not to make each other what you imagined them to be.
But no matter what she said, the man turned a deaf ear and still did the same.
But a year ago, Wang Min suddenly found that men seemed to have changed sex, and her thoughts and decisions, men listened more with a smile, no longer pointing fingers and being picky as before.
The man's desire to control Wang Min is not so strong. In the past, when Wang Min and his girlfriends went out to party, men would ask all kinds of details clearly, and even pick up and drop off in person, but now men rarely interfere in Wang Min's spare time, and it is often Wang Min who takes the initiative to say it, and the man will say "um", and then admonish:
You guys have fun, call me if you need to.
Wang Min thought that men had finally learned to respect and tolerate, but he didn't know the truth behind it was that the man's heart had already shifted outward, and he had no intention of paying attention to his wife at all.
Because the heart is no longer with you, the man is willing to give you time and space, so that he no longer gets entangled and pays attention to your thoughts and life.
Writer Keigo Higashino said:
Only the sun and the human heart cannot be looked at directly.
Human nature is complex, and excessive gullibility can only hurt oneself.
Pay more attention to everything, think more about why, there must be demons in everything, there is no reason behind no behavior.
Believe in love, believe in character, but also believe in yourself and be strong.