's mother was subjected to domestic violence to the point of fracture and was afraid of knocking on the door, Zhong Meimei's "precociousness" was not accidental

There is such a boy, every time he appears in the public eye, he will arouse different group emotions.

In 2020, 13-year-old Zhong Meimei became popular imitating teachers on short video websites, wearing a fur collar, wearing a small pink shoulder, and sticking his hands in front of his chest, he seems to have become the "Chinese teacher" in everyone's memories.

Image source: short video @Zhong Meimei

Netizens joked: "Let you imitate, not let you surpass." Some teachers even found their own shadow in it.

Not long after becoming popular, Zhong Meimei's video was quickly taken off the shelves, and "whether it has a negative impact on the image of teachers" made him the focus of controversy.

However, he did not lose himself because of this wave of traffic, but made learning the most important thing. His mother also turned down millions of brokerage offers, allowing him to concentrate on his studies.

In 2022, Zhong Meimei was admitted to the International Department of Harbin No. 3 Middle School. Because of this "best" key middle school in Harbin, Zhong Meimei has received the most praise in the past three years.

And the last time it was on the hot search, people found that behind such an interesting and optimistic boy, there was a sad past, and his childhood was not happy.

In an interview, Zhong Meimei said that since she was 5 years old, her father often beat her mother, and the most serious one even beat her mother to the point of breaking a bone.

Image source: Sure Enough: Interview

Therefore, Zhong Meimei has been looking forward to her parents' divorce since she was a child, hoping to get rid of this fearful life.

Unexpectedly, after the divorce, my father still refused to give up, often harassing their mother and son, disturbing their peaceful life, and calling them with different numbers, hundreds of calls a night.

Zhong Meimei has a sister who is 9 years younger than him and is also a victim of domestic violence. The "ghostly" father left a huge psychological shadow on him and his sister, and there was a time when they were scared when they heard a knock on the door.

After her parents divorced, Zhong Meimei was sentenced to her mother, and her sister was sentenced to her father, and we don't know what the little girl's living situation is.

I only know that Zhong Meimei under the camera has developed a maturity beyond his age, he can take care of everyone's emotions, properly deal with unexpected problems, become the pillar of the family, and say some thought-provoking words from time to time.

After the interview video was released, "Zhong Meimei's mother was beaten and fractured" appeared on the hot search. In fact, this entry is not friendly, Zhong Meimei's mother is not a public figure, but she appears in the public eye with such a sad gesture, which inevitably makes the person concerned feel uncomfortable.

However, Zhong Meimei's response was "moved and grateful", and he was "glad that media friends can see the core of what I want to express", and through this topic, more people will think about domestic violence.

Image source: Weibo

The response was appropriate and warm, and it was well received, once again making people feel his maturity and stability as a 17-year-old high school student.

I still remember a few years ago, when Zhong Meimei was invited to participate in a media event, she answered the question "What is the deepest pain you have experienced". In a childish font, he solemnly wrote his answer: "There is no depth of pain. ”

Later, he mentioned more than once that his mother was abused and his parents divorced, but he also thought that these pains and tribulations made him stronger. He said that he would not get caught up in the grief of the past, but would move forward.

All of this shows Zhong Meimei's "precociousness" as a minor.

Many people lamented that he knew too much and didn't live like a child, and Zhong Meimei also found that she didn't have much common language with her peers. It can be seen that pain is not a good thing for children's growth.

According to the survey, 24.7 percent of women in mainland China have suffered some form of domestic violence in marriage, while about 5.5 percent have explicitly been beaten by their spouses, and more than 9 percent of the victims are women.

Image source: The movie "The Perfect Victim"

In these cases, attention needs to be paid not only to the victims of violence, but also to the bystanders of violence, i.e. the children in the family.

According to media estimates, about 90 million children in China live in violent families based on the average child per family.

Zhong Meimei used the method of "blowing up the family ugly" to tell us that domestic violence is a common behavior, and called on everyone to pay attention to those children who live in violence.

Even if there is no direct exposure to violence, the child, as a bystander, becomes disillusioned with family members, no longer believes in intimacy, and habitually feels helpless and inferior, both in family life and in emotional relationships.

Compared with children from other families, children who experience domestic violence have stronger mood swings and are prone to fear and fear.

For example, panic when you hear the sound of a key, and shiver at the sight of a strong man who is reluctant to leave his comfort zone. If this condition does not improve, it may also be replaced by mental and psychiatric illnesses such as depression.

Image source: TV series "Little Farewell"

In addition, children who live with violence spend their childhood in a state of control, and once the abuser becomes angry, they immediately enter the cocoon they have woven and do not want to come out.

They lack a sense of control over their lives and don't know how to take control of their own lives, so they have to put control in the hands of others. The scary thing is that this will also start a new cycle of violence.

For school-age children, domestic violence can undoubtedly seriously affect the child's ability to learn, and high levels of tension and anxiety can deprive the child of attention and interest in learning.

Therefore, the damage caused by domestic violence is not only physical, even if the child is not directly beaten, they will leave a deep psychological shadow.

There are also domestic abusers who beat their spouses and children at the same time. This pain and fear is more intuitive, heavier and harder to dissipate, causing both physical and mental damage to the child.

We resist domestic violence, not only because we have been substantially harmed, but also because domestic violence transmits black and gray memories to the next generation, imperceptibly affecting everyone in the game.

Image source: TV series "Come on! Mom"

As Zhong Meimei wrote on Weibo: "I call on the whole society to resist domestic violence, and I also hope that the law on domestic violence will be improved." "How to protect children in domestic violence is the common responsibility of the whole society.

Specific to each individual who has been harmed, no one is born invulnerable, only ordinary people who continue to cultivate in the midst of suffering.

Zhong Meimei stepped out of the shadows and lived as 90 million children yearn for, and also inspired more people to "raise themselves all over again" and pass on love and warmth to the next generation.

Take the initiative to press the pause button and let the violence end in this generation, which is the imperfect self and the best explanation for the child.