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The morning sun pours in through the floor-to-ceiling windows of the office, casting a warm spot of light on the floor. I took a deep breath and tried to calm my restlessness. Today is an important day for me, and it is my last chance to confess to my long-cherished Zhang Hao. If we don't seize this opportunity, we will really have to stop at friends forever.
I tidied up my grooming and wished I could look natural instead of being nervous like a madman. I took out a small gift prepared in advance, a beautiful keychain engraved with Zhang Hao's name, and held it in the palm of my hand, feeling its temperature and weight, as if this was the embodiment of my love for him.
I knew there were some obstacles between us, such as the age gap between us, and the fact that he came from a well-to-do family and that I was just an ordinary office worker. However, I have made up my mind to talk about it. Even if I get rejected, at least I won't be tormented by regret and self-blame anymore.
I clenched the keychain in my hand, feeling its shape and temperature, as if this was the embodiment of my love for Zhang Hao. I took a deep breath, tried to look natural, and strode into the office.
A few colleagues in the office had already arrived, and they were talking to something in low voices. My eyes searched the crowd and soon found Zhang Hao's figure. He was staring intently at the computer screen, as if he was coding something. The sunlight shone obliquely on his handsome side face, making his facial features appear more deep and three-dimensional.
At that moment, he seemed to sense something and looked up at me. My heart was beating violently, and a fine layer of sweat was oozing uncontrollably from my palms. We looked at each other, and for a moment neither of us spoke.
"Zhang Hao, are you, are you free now?" It took me a while before I found my voice and mustered up the courage to ask. But as soon as I said that, I regretted it, for my voice was visibly shaking.
"What's the matter?" Zhang Hao asked kindly, his eyes a little puzzled.
I opened my mouth, only to find that I seemed to have lost the ability to speak. What should I say? Is it to say what is in my heart? But if we are rejected, how will we get along with each other in the future? A moment of silence enveloped the two of us, and the air became stagnant. My mind went blank and I regretted it.
Just when I was about to give up, I met Zhang Hao's puzzled eyes. Those clear eyes were like a pool of spring water, which rekindled hope and courage in my heart.
As soon as the words came out, I was not good. His face was so hot and dry that he was probably dripping blood. I lowered my head, not daring to look at Zhang Hao's expression, for fear of seeing disgust or disdain in his eyes.
Zhang Hao was stunned, his expression changing under my gaze. At first shock, then bewilderment, then a look of disbelief. Just when I thought he would reject me outright, he suddenly smiled, his eyebrows curled into a nice arc.
"I've always had a crush on you, fool. Zhang Hao said, his tone full of pampering, "But I'm sorry, I can't give you a definite answer yet." "
My heart was rekindled and filled with endless hope. But what Zhang Hao said next was like a heavy hammer, shattering my dream fiercely.
It turned out that Zhang Hao was already engaged, and he was going to get married next month. His fiancée is a girl who met on a blind date, the two have a good relationship, and the family also approves of this family affair very much.
"Although I also had a crush on you at first, in order not to hurt anyone, I decided to get married step by step. Zhang Hao explained, "I'm sorry, I should have told you earlier." "
My whole world fell apart at this moment, how could he never mention it when we had been together for so long? I felt cheated and betrayed. I clutched the keychain tightly, my nails digging into my flesh, afraid I would cry out of shape. But tears poured out of my eyes like a flood that burst the levees, and I could not say anything.
From that day on, I had a miserable life every day. When I was working, I would involuntarily look in the direction of Zhang Hao, and when I looked at his busy figure, tears would flow uncontrollably. I started to hate the job, the company, the city, and I just wanted to get away from it all.
Bathroom, left the company without looking back, far away.
About a month later, Zhang Hao's wedding took place as scheduled. Although I have made up my mind to let go of this obsession, I still can't help but cry the moment I receive the invitation.
On the day of the wedding, I did not go to the scene, but I silently blessed him alone at home. Through the circle of friends, I saw a sweet photo of him and the bride, and the two looked very affectionate and happy. There was an inexplicable pain in my heart, as if a sharp blade was cutting my heart.
"Hi, it's me. I know you've been saddened by recent events, but I want to thank you for your continued friendship. You are a very good girl, and I really hope that you can find your own happiness soon. Bless you. "
When I heard this, my tears finally broke down and I wept bitterly. Why is this happening? Why are we destined to miss out? I asked loudly into my phone, but there was nothing but my own response.
After all this, I finally made up my mind to get rid of this obsessive relationship. I started working like crazy, putting all my mind into my work, numbing myself with my work, leaving myself with no time and opportunity to think about it.
Sometimes, when I see the lovers on the street on the way to work overtime, I can't help but think of Zhang Hao. But I will soon shake off this thought and move on. I want to prove to myself that I am not a weak person and that I deserve to be treated gently by the world.
My friends were worried about me and came to see me and advised me to go home and rest for a while. But I refused, because as long as I was alone, I would start to think cranky. I prefer to waste all my time at work so that I can at least feel useful.
A year later, I was already the company's Employee of the Year. But when I stood on the podium, holding the heavy trophy, I didn't feel the slightest joy. On the contrary, my heart was empty, as if an important part was missing.
I began to realize that I had to get out of this runaway or I would be trapped by it forever. So I made up my mind to let go of the past completely and start anew.
In order to give myself a new environment, I quit my job and decided to go to another city and start over. When I handed my resignation to my boss, he was surprised because I was a key employee of the company.
"Have you been wronged in any way?" My boss asked me with concern, "If it's a problem at work, we can solve it through communication." "
I smiled and shook my head: "No, I just want to change the environment." After working here for so long, it's time to try something else. "
The boss nodded understandingly, showing understanding, and wishing me a bright future.
In this way, I gave up everything I had for the past five years and began a wandering life alone.
After leaving that city and all those distractions, my heart finally slowly returned to peace. I began to reflect on my past actions and began to learn from them.
Love is indeed a beautiful thing, but it is not the whole of life. Each of us should learn to let go and learn to let go when the time is right. If we are too complacent, we will miss out on other good things in life.
I started experimenting with all kinds of new lifestyles and made a lot of new friends. Gradually, I found that my life became more colorful, and the gloom of the past was slowly forgotten.
Until one day, I suddenly realized that I hadn't thought of Zhang Hao for a long, long time. The person who once haunted me day and night has slowly faded out of my life. My heart is free of shackles, and instead there is unprecedented freedom and relief.
Through this experience, I deeply realized that love is important, but it is not the whole of life. We should not pin all our hopes and happiness on love, which is too one-sided and narrow-minded.
In addition to love, we have many other meanings and goals in life, such as career, family, friendship, and so on. If we focus only on the pursuit of love and ignore other important parts of life, then we will become easily swayed by the gains and losses of love, and thus lose our inner peace and control.
We should learn to look at life in all its aspects and treat love as only one part of life. In this way, when we lose love, we will not feel that the world is no longer meaningful. On the other hand, if we focus too much on love, then once we lose love, we will fall into great pain and confusion.
It's time to let go. Many times, the reason why we fall into long-term pain is because we are obsessed and unwilling to let go.
Let's take my relationship with Zhang Hao as an example. If I had been able to accept and bless him and let go of it completely after learning that he was engaged, I wouldn't have experienced so much pain. It's a pity that I can't, I've been torturing myself and getting myself into a whirlpool.
It wasn't until I left the city and moved to a completely new environment that I finally let go of this obsession. I realized that life is a process of letting go and starting anew. If we learn to let go at the right time, we can avoid a lot of unnecessary suffering; If we rest on our laurels, we will be trapped in a whirlpool from which we will not be able to extricate ourselves.
During this experience, I also learned the importance of tolerance. At that time, I was very angry with Zhang Hao because he hid his marriage. But then I reflected on myself, maybe he was just acting out of good intentions and didn't want to hurt my feelings.
If you look at it from another point of view, Zhang Hao didn't do anything wrong. We are just ordinary friends, and we don't need everyone to know about his private affairs. It was I who was self-inflicted and had undue expectations for him, which is why I felt hurt and betrayed.
It can be seen that in many contradictions and conflicts, both sides may have some faults and prejudices. If we can all learn to be tolerant and understanding of each other, and think about each other's situation with empathy, we can avoid many disputes on the merits.
Tolerance is not only to be tolerant of others, but also to be tolerant of oneself. Each of us will make mistakes, and there will be some unsatisfactory points, but as long as we can find and correct them in time, we should forgive ourselves instead of always blaming ourselves and feeling guilty.
At the end of this experience, I would also like to thank myself for maintaining optimism and hope. If I had given up on myself completely and indulged in pain and despair, I would have lost my way and never been able to get out of the gloom.
Staying optimistic is not an easy thing to do, especially after a huge shock and disappointment. However, as long as we still have a glimmer of hope burning in our hearts, there is still a chance to start anew. We should give ourselves a fresh start and embrace life with a positive mindset instead of being bound by the shadows of the past.
It's like I finally made up my mind to leave that city and embark on a new journey. Although it was a psychological avoidance at first, I gradually realized that this decision gave me the opportunity to start anew. I made new friends, experienced a different way of life, and slowly came out of the gloom.
Now that I have completely let go of the past. I still miss the good times I had, but I cherish my life even more. I know that as long as we remain optimistic and brave in the face of it, we will be able to overcome any setbacks in life and regain the light.
All in all, this experience was difficult, but it gave me a lot of valuable life lessons. It made me understand that love is important, but it is not the whole of life; It taught me how to let go, be tolerant, and be optimistic. These are the most precious treasures of my life, and they will always be with me.
After going through this emotional ordeal, I have a new understanding and appreciation of life and life. These experiences not only warmed my own heart, but also guided me to a new stage of life.
After letting go of that attachment to Zhang Hao, I never regarded love as the whole of my life. I started to devote myself wholeheartedly to my career and put more energy into self-development and improvement.
With the lessons I learned from the past, I will never pin all my hopes and happiness on love again. I understand that love is beautiful, but it's only a part of life. If we compress the whole meaning of life on love, it will be too one-sided and narrow-minded.
Each of us should have our own independent life pursuits and career ideals, rather than all of our lives revolve around love. Only when we have our own independent personality can we avoid being swayed by the gains and losses of love, so as to gain true inner freedom.
It is with this realization that I was able to quickly get out of the haze and move on after that period of broken love. I began to put more energy into my work, and gradually became the backbone of the company.
Through that experience, I also learned to look at the people and things around me with tolerance and understanding. I was very angry with Zhang Hao before because he hid his marriage. But when I calmed down and thought about it, maybe he was just doing it with good intentions and didn't want to hurt our friendship.
If from his point of view, Zhang Hao did nothing wrong. We are just ordinary friends, and his private affairs do not need to be transparent to everyone. It was my own passion and my high expectations of him that made me so sensitive to this matter.
It can be seen that in many contradictions and conflicts, both sides may have some faults and prejudices in them. If we can all use empathy to think about the other party's situation and position, and tolerate some small mistakes of the other party with tolerance, we can resolve many disputes and rights and wrongs.
With this in mind, I have become more humble in my relationships. I will first try to understand and be considerate of the other person's situation, rather than blindly pointing fingers or blaming. In this way, my relationship with the people around me has become more harmonious, and it has become easier for everyone to resolve their differences.
During this experience, I also deeply realized the importance of staying optimistic and positive. If I had given up on myself completely and indulged in pain and despair, I would have lost my way and never been able to get out of the gloom.
Staying optimistic is not an easy thing to do, especially after experiencing huge setbacks and blows. However, as long as there is a glimmer of hope burning in our hearts, we will always have the opportunity to start anew. We should give ourselves a fresh start and embrace life with a positive mindset instead of being bound by the shadows of the past.
It's like I finally made up my mind to leave that city and embark on a new journey. Although it was just a mental escape at first, I gradually realized that this decision gave me the opportunity to start over. I made new friends, experienced a different way of life, and slowly came out of the gloom.
Now that I have completely let go of the past. Although I still miss the good old days, I cherish the present life even more. I know that as long as we remain optimistic and courageous, we will be able to overcome any setbacks in life and regain our light.
With this optimistic attitude, I quickly adapted to life in my new city. I joined a new company and was quickly recognized by my leadership for my abilities. A few years later, I'm already the core backbone of the company.
After this ordeal, I have come to understand the importance of an independent outlook on life. Each of us should take full responsibility for our own lives, rather than pinning our happiness on others.
One of the reasons why I was in such a long ago, was that I pinned all my happiness on love. I hope that Zhang Hao can give me happiness and become the whole meaning of my life. And when that expectation was disappointed, my whole world seemed to fall apart.
But if I had been able to maintain an independent outlook on life, this blow would not have affected me so much. Because I will understand that the gains and losses of love are important, but after all, it is only one part of life. There are many meanings and pursuits in our lives, such as career, family, friendship, etc., which are the backbone of our lives.
With this sense of independence, I have become more rational and objective in dealing with everything in life. Instead of squeezing all my hopes into one point, I have learned to balance all aspects of my life in all aspects.
This independent attitude to life has not only allowed me to achieve great achievements in my work and career, but also made me more stable and wise in dealing with interpersonal relationships. I learned to deal with the changes in life with a peaceful mind, and thus avoided a lot of unnecessary pain and struggle.