The bell of the high school entrance examination is approaching, and every drop of the hammer strikes on the heart. Not only did the children sprint the track, but the hearts of teachers and parents also beat faster and faster with the countdown of time. On this tight string, we felt the symphony of anxiety and expectation from students, teachers, and parents. Let's take a look at your current status:
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The junior high school students are about to face the high school entrance examination, and they are under unprecedented academic pressure, and at the same time, they are also facing various conflicts in parent-child relationships, teacher-student relationships, and classmate relationships. Recently, Wuhai No. 12 Middle School brought a psychological counseling lecture with the theme of "stimulating learning ability and enhancing action ability" to all students in the third grade, analyzing the characteristics of psychological pressure of students who should take the examination and understanding the stressors of students from inside and outside.
The students first played the game of "you catch me and I escape", and then Mr. Zhang Rui used the famous Soma puzzle experiment to introduce the concept and meaning of "learning motivation", so that students can understand that "if something is only what we want to complete from the heart, we can do it quickly and well." ”
Mr. Zhang explained from the three dimensions of "sense of autonomy, sense of support and sense of ability", analyzed the importance of autonomy in combination with classic movie clips, and guided students to feel the supportive resources around them with the activity of "tumbler", and finally learned how to improve their sense of ability.
This counseling actively encourages students to explore their internal motivations, from "I have to learn" to "I want to learn", from being forced to complete tasks to taking the initiative to achieve self-realization. It also motivates students to work hard to realize their dreams, and hopes that all junior high school students can turn pressure into motivation to study diligently, seize the day, and live up to their time.
Children and parents are often nervous before the high school entrance examination, and parents should remember not to pass on this tension to their children to avoid affecting their children's normal performance.
When the pressure is high, how can you stay calm and adjust your mindset so that you and your child are in the best shape for the challenge?
The law of transposition:
Actively interpret your child's anxiety
Why are children nervous about exams?
Nervousness is a stress response that is inherent in human genes. In ancient times, in the face of hunting dangers and being in a state of tension, you can better exert your skills.
So, once we understand the sources and instinctual motivations of tension, let's ask ourselves: Is tension necessarily a bad thing?
In fact, "pressure is also motivation". In psychology, there is a very interesting inverted U-curve, which states that moderate levels of stress are most conducive to learning outcomes.
Therefore, moderate test anxiety is helpful for children to improve their grades, but excessive anxiety will affect children's performance in the examination room.
As parents, we should not blindly deny and expel the stress before the exam, not "don't be nervous", but use the positive effect of the right amount of "nervousness" to help children adjust the pressure to an appropriate level and enter the best state of response.
The Law of Listening:
Be good at listening to your child's anxieties
Let's start with a test: How do parents respond when your child shares nervousness with you?
A, at this time, I know that I am nervous, why did I go earlier, why don't I hurry up and review at the last time!
B. There is not much time left, grit your teeth and get through, or you will review for half an hour more every day, which will be more reassuring!
C. It's almost time for the exam, so you don't have to think about it, it's useless to think so much, isn't it?
D. Mom saw that you were a little nervous, and I used to be a little stressed before the exam, which is normal. (Purification)
E. I see that you have been working hard during the revision period, and I am sure that you will perform at your own level. (Affirmation/Encouragement)
If you ask your child, most of them expect the parent to respond like D and E. Because when the child's worries and nervousness are accepted, and the parents respond to the child's emotions with stable empathy, the child will receive emotional support, relieve excessive anxiety, and perform better.
In addition to learning to accept, you must also learn to confide. At this time, parents can encourage their children to talk about their feelings with their parents, teachers, friends, and other people they trust, or write about their feelings.
What am I worried about?
What am I afraid of?
Why am I so panicked?
What happens if something you worry about and fear really happens?
......
The process of expressing inner emotions through oral or written language is actually the process of sorting out personal emotions, which will make children feel more relieved and feel relieved such as "it is so" and "it is not so".
Pre-plan rules:
Plan ahead to be confident
Anxiety is a sign of loss of control. Exams are undoubtedly full of too many unknowns and uncertainties, and children may be anxious because they are out of control.
However, children can still balance and alleviate the loss of control over unknown exams by adding a sense of control in other areas. Such as making small labels, daily plans, task lists, etc. for yourself. These controls will help your child regain a sense of stability and ease anxiety.
Another great way to relieve anxiety is to "keep yourself busy."
In fact, the child's anxiety is mainly due to the lack of psychological stability, it is recommended that in the remaining days, you can let the child make some small plans for himself, complete some tasks step by step every day, so that he is not too relaxed.
At the same time, you can also return to some basic principles and laws, or take a look at the wrong question books sorted out in the past, so that you can live a more fulfilling life and not be so anxious.
The Law of Relaxation:
Use scientific methods to calm emotions
When children are always worried that they will fail in the exam, we should tell the child: any worry about failing the exam and the brilliance after the exam is an artificially added psychological burden, which is a distraction for the exam, so there is no need to make too many assumptions before the exam, just do the current thing.
In addition to the nervousness before the exam, children will also encounter momentary nervousness in the exam room.
It is recommended that the child can use one or two minutes to adjust the state to calm down at this time, and can be adjusted by deep breathing or muscle relaxation. You can do some stretching movements, and when you open your body, it will effectively relieve anxiety in your heart.
Motivation Rules:
Fill up your child's "fuel tank".
Before exams, children need to decompress, and so do parents.
If you feel nervous, you can go out for a walk, watch a movie, etc., to divert your attention and free yourself from nervousness.
Finally, it is recommended that parents use positive encouragement and positive words and actions to help their children successfully achieve their goals.
No matter what happens, Mom and Dad will always have your back!
Don't let the difficulty overwhelm you, let it help you become stronger!
The future is made up of only one ingredient, and that is the present. Be prepared to review now and worry about the future.
As long as you believe in yourself, the determination to fight against the odds is still there, and no difficulties can stop you.
Every day before you prepare for the exam, you're writing your history.
Remember to tell yourself that I have an opportunity, not an obstacle, in front of me!
If you don't let it go, you don't know how much potential you have!
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