#春曰生活打卡季#
Text: Yu Xiaohuan (Rich Book Columnist)
Writer Liu Yong once said: "Life is like opening a store, not afraid of closing, afraid of not opening again, not afraid of the store being old, as long as things are fresh."
Many people think that 35-45 years old is their slack period, so they stop working hard.
However, any age has its own beauty that deserves to bloom, and it does not stand still because of the passage of time.
There is a quote from the movie "One Flew Over the Asylum": "You have been complaining about this place, but you don't have the courage to get out of here." ”
It is true that many times, we always like to talk about our complaints and express our dissatisfaction to others.
But we forget that no one wants to listen to the same complaints and pains.
Complaining once in a while may be a catharsis of some kind of emotion, and it is okay, but people who complain often will make life more and more strange.
A sign of a strong person begins with quitting complaining.
Complaining excessively will only hurt you
I have heard a saying: Life is like a mirror, if you smile at it, it will smile at you, and if you cry to it, it will cry to you. Complaining doesn't make life any better.
I think so.
In "Dream of Red Mansions", although Aunt Zhao, who was born as a maid, became Jia Zheng's concubine and had a pair of children, her life should be very promising, but because she loves to complain too much, she has become a resentful woman who is hated by everyone.
Because of a pair of shoes, he complained that his daughter "turned her elbow out";
Thinking that he was in a higher position, he complained that the government gave too little and that his food and clothing were too poor.
Daughter Jia Tanchun is the granddaughter of the Jia family, because Sister Feng is sick and bedridden, Mrs. Wang asked her to take over the task of housekeeping.
Soon after Tanchun took office, he received the news that his uncle had died, and according to the rules, Tanchun gave the Zhao family twenty taels of silver, which was not inappropriate.
But Aunt Zhao was dissatisfied, thinking that Tanchun was "climbing high branches", ignoring the dignity of the Zhao family, complaining that she gave too little and was too cold.
In fact, always complaining, playing right and wrong, and making a lot of trouble, is the culprit of Aunt Zhao's loss of face.
Later, because he offended too many people, he was bullied, looked at everything, and lived a miserable life.
There is a kind of person in sociology who is called a "habitual complainer":
They look at the world with tinted glasses, always think that they are the most unfortunate, and constantly try to make others understand them by complaining.
As everyone knows, such behavior is the most incompetent manifestation in the eyes of others.
Sanmao said: "If you complain and don't seek change, you are not a smart person." ”
Some people's grievances are just a kind of inertia, and this unhappiness is really a waste of life.
Only people with great wisdom can smile and not care about small things.
When you swallow complaints, swallow grievances, and feed the big picture, life will suddenly open up.
Complaining is like poison, avoiding it will be successful
《华严经》云：“一念嗔心起，百万障门开”。
When I was young, I always thought that being able to express my dissatisfaction was an ability, the ability to see things clearly.
Later, I realized that once I opened my mouth to express my grievances, I would be trapped in obsession endlessly.
In fact, everyone has their own attachments in their hearts, but complaining will only make people more embarrassed.
A cousin who works for a well-known tech company as a software engineer.
One day, because he accidentally made a small mistake, his boss severely criticized him in front of everyone.
My cousin felt insulted because he had always thought he was doing well and working hard in the company, and he didn't deserve such criticism for a small mistake.
Since then, he has been unhappy every time he goes to work, complaining to others about the unfairness of his boss and complaining about the company's unreasonable management.
His mood is getting worse and worse, he complains when he sees people, and he becomes more and more paranoid.
Later, his colleagues began to distance themselves from him, believing that he was "too whiny" and that no one wanted to be affected by negative emotions.
Eventually, he missed a chance to get promoted.
It has been said that complaining is a poison.
Because every complaint is an erosion of the soul, and over time, it will make you physically and mentally exhausted.
Many times, we will become decadent, precisely because of the tip of the horns, and then excessive internal friction.
Nietzsche said: "If you are pessimistic, you will not have the courage to face reality, nor will you have the strength to fight against suffering, and you will suffer even more as a result." ”
In the process of life, you have to constantly experience struggles and sadness, and you can only rely on yourself whether you can get out.
In life, tolerance is the only way to be happy, and open-mindedness is the medicine.
Really smart people don't count the past.
Only those who are generous-minded can afford to take on great responsibilities.
Instead of complaining, take the initiative to seek change
Do you have such people around you?
They slump after a setback, drink all day, talk to others, and constantly confide in their unhappiness, and the most common thing they say is "if".
However, where are there so many ifs in life, we can't always live in the past, and more importantly, look to the future.
In the movie "When Happiness Knocks on the Door", the protagonist Chris Gardner is at a low point in his life.
Faced with bankruptcy, his wife could not bear the poverty and betrayed him, leaving only his young son to depend on him;
Because he couldn't pay the rent, he was kicked out of the house by the landlord, so he could only wander around the station with his son, and when his son asked him "where are we going", he helplessly said "I don't know".
In the end, he slept in the "cave" - the toilet of the station.
Still, he never complained.
Use all the time every day to improve yourself and find all possibilities.
Eventually, with perseverance, he got the opportunity to do an internship, and although he didn't earn any money during the six months of the internship, he still worked hard and found time to learn knowledge.
In order to save time at work, do not drink water or go to the toilet when you go to work;
In order to make a few more calls, just hang up one and then call the other, without a trace of slackness;
During the day, he endured the rejection of customers, and at night accompanied his son through the dark and filthy city and lived on the streets.
Eventually, he passed his exams, became a stockbroker, and later, with determination and perseverance, started his own company.
Many times, we always think that life's suffering is inevitable.
As everyone knows, a lot of misfortunes and prejudices are actually related to themselves.
Because, the more you complain, the more people will turn away from you, and the more you complain, the harder life will become.
Continue to improve yourself, and beautiful people and things will be attracted;
Constantly growing upwards is my greatest reliance.
Confucius said: "Introspection is not guilty, why complain about others." ”
The most important thing in a person's life is to be worthy of their own heart, and don't take complaining as a habit.
The stronger the person, the less he will complain, but low-key introspection and cultivation of the mind.
If you learn to be tolerant, you will be able to understand everything and become more peaceful in your heart.
Let go of attachment, the heart must be broad, in order to surpass oneself;
Stay away from complaining, life will bloom, and action will have power.
May we complain less, understand and be satisfied more in the journey of life, and life will be more transparent.
作者简介：余小欢，富书专栏作者，富小书的人，一个人要想成功，你都需要一种能力来支撑你做好自己，不被阻挠，不被诱惑，这就是屏蔽力，第4本书已出版，图书《屏蔽力》正在热销中，你的生活，需要屏蔽力，本文：富小书，本文版权归富书所有，未经授权，不得转载，侵权必究
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