Author: Insight Annabesu
The Jews divide people into three types:
The first type, the wise people, they learn from everything in this world;
the second, ordinary people, who learn from their own lessons;
The third type, stupid people, who think they don't need to learn.
When you meet a third person, you must not try to wake him up, and don't try to change him.
Because arguing with people with low cognition and reasoning with people of different levels is a kind of futility in itself.
01
Don't argue with people with low cognition
Writer Bao Pengshan has a friend who was once invited to participate in an interview with a TV station.
During the recording, the topic of "children hitting people" was discussed.
When it was his friend's turn to speak, he said arbitrarily: Children from single-parent families have violent tendencies.
Bao Pengshan felt that this was too absolute, so he sent him a message:
"Confucius and Mencius were also single-parent families, but they were all gentle and polite people. If you say that, it will be difficult for children from single-parent families to cope with themselves. ”
Subsequently, he moved from psychology to sociology, wanting to correct the other side's point of view.
But the other party insisted that single-parent families must not be able to educate their children well.
Bao Pengshan said a few more words, and his friends argued with him.
Bao Pengshan finally smiled helplessly: If we continue to talk about it, maybe we don't even have to be friends.
At the beginning of the 20th century, the US Secretary of the Treasury William McAdoo once said: You cannot defeat the ignorant with debate.
The other party thinks that the earth is a huge plane, and you try to change the other person's mind by using the change of shadows, the appearance of masts, and photos in space as examples, which is doomed to be in vain.
Because the premise of all this is that the other party must admit in his heart: my cognition is limited, and my cognition may be wrong.
And that's exactly the hardest part.
As the writer Mizumurai said:
When your perception is beyond the other person, he will instinctively defend and resist. Because everyone is proving that they are right and that their dignity cannot be violated.
The lower the cognitive level, the more singular the thinking and the more absolute the idea, the less likely it is to be convinced.
They only believe the facts in their own minds and refuse to accept the opinions of others;
They cling to their own set of theories and judge the world with their own shallow three views.
To argue with such a person is only in vain, trying to enlighten stupidity, and in the end it is yourself who consumes it.
02
Don't reason with people who don't know the same
I once read a paragraph on the Internet:
A asks B: Do you have A Brief History of Time?
B replied: Neurotic, I won't pick up when I have time!
Although it is a joke, it reflects many of the ubiquitous realities in life.
Many times, you give advice with good intentions, but you get the other person's eyes, because you are not a cognitive person at all.
When the writer Sanmao lived in the desert, he had a good relationship with his neighbor Handi's family.
One day, she was shocked to learn that her neighbor was going to marry off her 10-year-old daughter, Guka.
She strongly admonished the other party: this is inhumane, this kind of behavior is very cruel to a girl who is not yet an adult.
The neighbors thought that this was customary, and that Guka could have children early if she got married early.
Sanmao continued to talk endlessly, trying to correct their distorted concept, but the other party became more and more disgusted, and the two families almost turned against each other.
Everyone can only understand everything around them according to their own knowledge and experience.
Reasoning with people with different cognitions is also a drain on oneself.
Li Wei, a consultant, has a friend who has set up a factory before.
My friend thinks that connections are very important, and he participates in various dinners every day, hoping to open up sales channels, but he ignores the affairs of the factory.
Li Wei persuaded him: "The quality of the product is the first, there is time for those mixed meals, you might as well go to the workshop to stare at the production in person." ”
The friend didn't care, Li Wei was anxious, pulled the other party to the café, and talked about the stakes for a long time.
But out of the café, Li Wei found that his WeChat was blocked by the other party.
It didn't take long for my friend's factory to go wrong – the first batch of products was checked for a large number of non-conformities.
The workers had to work overtime to rework, and friends also returned to the workshop to do it themselves.
There is a huge cognitive gap between people, and forcibly admonishing others will only lead to futility and cause a commotion.
Allowing reality to educate him and let him spontaneously complete cognitive upgrading is the cultivation of a wise man.
03
Never wake up a person with low cognition
Blogger @清风明月 told such a story.
A few years ago, before takeaway was on the rise, she repeatedly persuaded her relatives who opened snack bars to make online takeaways.
But relatives don't think it's necessary:
Who will buy food online, it's not delicious when it's cold, what should I do if something goes wrong, I've been open for so many years, and I haven't been doing it well......
In short, I just don't want to do takeout.
A few years later, the development of online catering was in full swing, and the business status of my relative's small shop became more and more miserable, and finally it had to close its doors.
In life, many people are stubborn to a far greater extent than you imagine.
When e-commerce was emerging, you persuaded a friend in the traditional sales industry to enter the game, but he felt that it was not necessary;
When you see that the project invested by your relative is risky, you kindly remind him, but he blames you for blocking his financial path.
People who are trapped by their own thinking are more likely to cling to prejudices and refuse to make changes.
In "Poor Dad and Rich Dad", the protagonist Kiyosaki has a friend who works as a reporter at the newspaper.
Her articles are very popular with readers, but her income is not high, and she can barely make ends meet.
With good writing skills, she naturally had new ideas and began to write books outside of work, hoping to make a lot of money by publishing her own books.
Although the content of the books she writes is good, she does not know how to operate and promote, and she can't sell a single new book.
She became depressed and couldn't help but complain frequently.
Kiyosaki listened and advised her not to be discouraged and to learn marketing knowledge first.
She lost her temper when she heard this: Don't confuse me with a low-level salesperson.
Kiyosaki could only shake his head, and the two parted happily.
Many years later, the friend still stayed at the newspaper office, on a meager salary, and continued to live a tight life.
The American writer Alex Ferguson once said:
Everyone guards a door of change that opens from within, and even if you move it with affection and reason, you can't open the door for others.
The greatest sobriety of adults is not to reason with prejudiced people, and not to talk about flexibility with stubborn people.
▽
The philosopher Schopenhauer once said:
There is only one way to deal with those fools and stupid people: don't talk to such people.
Don't compete with fools, don't argue with stupid people.
Let go of the plot of helping others, respect your own fate, and believe that the person you can't wake up, there will always be a south wall to wake him up.
Give it a thumbs up, friends.