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Text: Liuli said entertainment
Edited |
Preamble:
What exactly is love?
Is it the mutual attraction of two souls, or is it a bargain between you and me?
Is it a haven to cherish and care for each other, or is it to take what they need?
When love collides with reality, when ideals and desires are intertwined, how should a woman choose?
This is a true story, about the love story of Xu Jinglei and Wang Shuo.
It spanned nearly 20 years, experiencing passion, pain, separation, growth, and finally ending in a dull ending.
This story is touching and thought-provoking, let us walk into Xu Jinglei's inner world and feel the difficulties of women in that era.
The extraordinary growth of an ordinary girl
In April 1974 in Beijing, spring was in full swing.
In an ordinary worker's family in Sanlitun, a baby girl named Xu Jinglei fell to the ground.
Although the parents are not wealthy, they are full of joy and anticipation for the arrival of their daughter.
They believe that as long as they put in enough love and hard work, their daughter will be able to grow up healthy and happy and have a wonderful life of her own.
Jinglei in childhood thrived under the care of her strict father and mother.
Her father was strict with her, often forbidding her to go out to play and asking her to concentrate on her studies.
She often hides alone on the couch watching black-and-white TV, or plays the piano alone.
Her introverted and withdrawn personality makes it difficult for her to fit in with the group, and she is left alone when her peers are playing.
But it is this environment that has honed her indomitable will and cultivated her ability to think independently.
With her outstanding talent, Jinglei was successfully admitted to a key middle school.
She began to learn painting, music, and dance, and a bright artistic seed sprouted in her heart.
Despite her busy academic schedule, she was shy by nature and still couldn't integrate into the group, but became an "alternative" in the eyes of her classmates.
She often paints and plays the piano silently by herself, as if this is the only way for her to vent her emotions.
Although the teachers admired her talent, they were also worried about her withdrawal.
But nature and talent can't be hidden.
Jing Lei has found her own world in painting, and the beautiful piano sound has also become her way to express her emotions.
At that time, she rode a bicycle through the streets and alleys of Beijing, looking for a secluded art classroom, and approached her dream step by step.
She understands that only by constantly honing her skills can she go further on the road of art.
This ignorant girl is already pregnant with an extraordinary future.
The girl first met Wang Shuo, a giant in the literary world
With the dream of becoming an excellent actor, Jing Lei was admitted to the Performance Department of Beijing Film Academy.
Living alone away from her parents is undoubtedly a new challenge for her as an introvert.
But she understands that only by working hard to improve herself can she have a place in this competitive circle.
She was diligent and meticulous in every role, and quickly stood out among her classmates.
It was at this time that she met him------ famous writer Wang Shuo.
At that time, Wang Shuo was already a giant in the literary world, and his career was in full swing, while Jinglei was just an unknown student.
The age difference between the two is 13 years, but they collide in the common hobby of literature and art.
Wang Shuo was amazed by Jinglei's talent and understanding, and often discussed literature and life with her; Jing Lei admired Wang Shuo's erudition and humor, and regarded him as a mentor in life.
At first, Wang Shuo was full of pity for this simple and kind girl.
He often told her the truth of life and guided her to go further in her acting career.
Jing Lei regarded him as a bosom friend and life mentor, and opened her heart to him.
She confided in him her dreams and confusions, and he always gave the wisest advice.
However, this innocent feeling has unconsciously deteriorated.
The friendship between teacher and student gradually evolved into the love between men and women, and the two lonely hearts got closer and closer to each other in the comfort of each other.
It's easy to fall in love, but it's too hard to stay together
In 1996, 22-year-old Jing Lei and Wang Shuo confirmed their relationship.
For the sake of this girl, Wang Shuo even gave up the originally happy family.
The young and vigorous Jinglei was naturally ecstatic, she thought that she had finally gotten this man's sincerity.
She devoted herself to this relationship and almost regarded Wang Shuo as her own.
Regardless of the opposition and doubts of others, she followed her true love without hesitation.
With Wang Shuo's support, Jinglei's career has been strengthened.
She has starred in many acclaimed film and television works one after another, and has become a hot and popular star.
In 1999, at the age of 25, Jinglei reached the peak of her career and became the focus of attention.
Love and career are both harvested, this is simply a dream life for her.
She was grateful to Wang Shuo for everything she had given her, worked harder, and did not want to live up to his love.
However, there is no such thing as a feast that will not be dissolved.
The relationship problems between the two gradually emerged, and the contradictions and conflicts continued.
Maybe it's the difference in age and experience, or maybe it's just the loss of freshness, Jinglei gradually realizes that she is just a doll in Wang Shuo's palm, and she can't talk about true love at all.
She began to question Wang Shuo's sincerity and doubt her position in his heart.
This realization made the innocent her feel extremely disappointed and painful.
She tries to salvage the relationship, but finds that the gap between the two is getting wider and wider, and she can never go back to the past.
Loved, and hurt
A bitter quarrel in 2004 was the straw that broke the camel's back.
After 8 years together, Jinglei made the most difficult decision in her life------ to break up with Wang Shuo.
Although this decision made her heartbroken, she understood that she could not live in the shadow of Wang Shuo forever, and she had to pursue her own life.
She doesn't want to be an accessory anymore, and she doesn't want to let her dream be tied to Wang Shuo's fame anymore.
She wants to prove that without Wang Shuo, she can live a wonderful life.
After the breakup, Jinglei fell into deep pain for a while.
She began to doubt her own judgment and even developed a fear of love.
She didn't understand why all her dedication was in exchange for hurt and betrayal.
She began to close her heart and no longer easily believed in the so-called true love.
Although he also had several boyfriends later, every relationship ended without a problem.
The girl who was once innocent fell deeper and deeper into the whirlpool of feelings.
She began to wonder that maybe she was not suitable for love at all.
It wasn't until many years later that Jing Lei really saw the essence of this relationship.
She understands that she was too young and naïve back then, and she took a deformed relationship as true love.
She was attracted by Wang Shuo's fame and status, but ignored the gap between the souls of the two.
This experience has hurt her deeply, but it has also taught her how to love herself.
She understands that true love should be mutual appreciation and achievement between two independent individuals, rather than blind giving and accommodation.
Looking back indifferently, I know the true meaning of love
Now, 46-year-old Xu Jinglei has long let go of her obsession with Wang Shuo.
Years of experience have taught her that true love is not about taking, but about giving; Not possession, but fulfillment.
She no longer deliberately pursues the so-called white moonlight, but devotes herself to her career and life.
Looking back at the past, Jing Lei was full of emotion.
This unforgettable emotional experience shaped her personality and transformed her from an ignorant girl to a strong woman in charge.
It bears witness to the difficult situation of women in the eighties and nineties of the last century, when the poor could only rely on the powerful if they wanted to turn over.
Countless girls like Jinglei have lost themselves in the struggle between ideals and reality.
Nowadays, with the passage of time, the social status of women has been greatly improved, and the autonomy of marriage and love has long become the norm.
The static shock undoubtedly gives people deep thought: does love really need to give everything?
Isn't the value and dignity of the individual less worth defending than love?
Epilogue:
Love is never a transaction of money and status, but the attraction and fit of the soul.
It requires two independent individuals, with a heart of appreciation and tolerance, to see each other's beauty and achieve each other's ideals.
Xu Jinglei's story tells us that there will inevitably be ups and downs on the road of love, but as long as we don't forget our original intention and bravely face the various tests of life, we will eventually reap our own beauty.
As Xu Jinglei said: "I have done a lot of things in my life, but the only thing I will not regret is to give myself to Wang Shuo at the age of 20." "
This may be the best look of love - even if we are separated, even if our hearts are broken, we are still willing to devote ourselves wholeheartedly, because we believe that love is a blessing and there are no regrets.