In love, ritual is often seen as an important element to add romance and interest. It could manifest itself as a regular date, a holiday surprise, or a small habit in everyday life.
However, a sense of ritual isn't always a booster for a relationship, and sometimes, it can even be a trigger for a relationship breakdown. So, why is it that many people's love is ruined by a sense of ceremony?
1. Excessive expectations for a sense of ritual
In the early stages of a relationship, romance and passion often make people have high expectations for a sense of ritual. When these expectations are not met, disappointment and dissatisfaction can arise. For example, one party may expect the other party to surprise them on every important day, while the other party may fail to do so for various reasons, which can lead to friction and conflict between the two parties.
Second, the sense of ritual becomes a burden
For some people, maintaining a sense of ritual in a relationship can become a burden. They may feel stressed due to work, life, etc., and the extra sense of ritual may make them feel more exhausted. When this burden becomes too heavy, they may choose to run away or rebel, thus destroying the harmony of the relationship.
3. The disconnect between the sense of ritual and the real emotion
Ritual is supposed to be a form of emotional expression, but sometimes, it can be disconnected from real emotion. Some people may deliberately create a sense of ritual in order to maintain the so-called "romance", but ignore the real emotional exchange. Such a sense of ritual not only does not enhance understanding and trust between the two parties, but can lead to estrangement in the relationship.
Fourth, the difference in the understanding of the sense of ritual
Everyone's understanding and expectation of a sense of ritual is different. Some people may place more emphasis on the small details and habits of their daily lives, while others may place more emphasis on big celebrations. When there is a disagreement between the two sides on the understanding of the sense of ritual, if they cannot communicate and adjust in time, it may lead to the accumulation of contradictions and dissatisfaction.
Fifth, the sense of ritual obscures the essence of the problem
Sometimes, people can rely too much on ritual to maintain a romantic relationship and lose sight of the essence of the problem. For example, when there is a communication barrier or trust problem between the two parties, they may try to compensate for these deficiencies by adding a sense of ritual rather than actually addressing the problem. Far from solving the root cause of the problem, this approach may further complicate it.
6. The conflict between ritual and personal values
Everyone's values are different, and for some, they may not consider a sense of ritual to be an essential part of a relationship. If one partner in a relationship places too much emphasis on the importance of ritual while the other person disagrees on it, this can lead to a conflict of values. This kind of conflict, if not properly handled, can cause serious damage to the relationship.
7. The imbalance between the sense of ritual and daily life
A sense of ritual in a relationship should be a part of everyday life, not the whole of life. If both partners are too obsessed with creating a sense of ritual and ignore the reality and triviality of everyday life, it can lead to an imbalance in the relationship. This imbalance can not only make both parties feel tired and bored, but it can also affect their development and growth in other areas.
A sense of ritual can indeed play a positive role in a relationship, and it can bring more romance and interest to both parties. However, if the sense of ritual is not understood and used properly, it can become a stumbling block in a romantic relationship. Therefore, in love, we should look at the role of ritual rationally, not only pay attention to the cultivation of romance and taste, but also pay attention to the real emotions and needs of both parties. At the same time, we should also learn to find a balance between ritual and daily life to make the relationship healthier and more stable. Only in this way can we truly enjoy the beauty and happiness that love brings.