There are such a part of people, in this relationship, love very deeply and seriously, and when they break up, it is especially easy to put all the responsibility on themselves, thinking that it is their fault that leads to the breakup.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
In fact, if you calm down and think about it, you will find an obvious loophole, that is, it is obviously the other party who proposed the breakup, you feel sorry for the other party here, and you feel indebted to the other party everywhere, aren't you finding guilt for yourself?
But you may not be able to listen to me when I say this, you just need to know that when you feel that everything is your fault, your mentality is actually out of balance.
There are also some people who have low self-esteem, which is generated in the process of recovery, that is, you will feel that you have worked so hard to redeem yourself, and you have used all methods, but the other party just refuses to turn back, it must be that you have hurt TA too deeply, it must be that TA has let go, it must be that you are not worthy of TA, etc.
At this time, you can also think about the question, that is, is your method of redemption correct?
People with low self-esteem, they think about problems, which is different from our normal circumstances, for example, to find an ex to get back together, because the underlying logic is that they feel that they have done something wrong, and they are sorry for their ex, so the first task is to keep apologizing and admitting mistakes, begging hard, and stalking, because their hearts are a kind of compensatory psychology.
The more the other party refuses, the more it makes sense, and the other party rejects it, and feels that the other party's rejection of him is self-inflicted.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
If you don't change this underlying logic, there is no way for your recovery method to be correct, because you have gone in the wrong direction when you summarize the reasons for the breakup, how can your recovery succeed?
If you are also a person who thinks like this, I hope you can understand a truth, that is, emotional problems can never be a person's fault, I will give you an example today to help you change your original line of thinking.
For example, you think it's because when you were with her, you played games every day, and she thought you weren't motivated, so she broke up with you.
At this time, you have to think about whether your game has affected your work, or whether she has helped you find a job, or whether you have affected your normal life by playing games, or whether you have the responsibility and obligation to help you quit your game addiction since she is your girlfriend, rather than simply choosing to give up on you.
Although from a normal point of view, it is indeed your fault, but since you are a couple, any mistake is shared by the two of you, and you make yourself too much blame for yourself, and it will not do you any good to redeem it.
Let's explain this topic in depth, in the relationship, if a person is very inferior, it is actually because they do not have the emotional power of the core, and they need external emotions to let themselves get peace of mind.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
Some people here may say that when two people are together, they need each other's emotions to meet their emotional needs, and there is nothing wrong with that.
In fact, this is wrong, I never think that falling in love is to find another person to meet their emotional needs, but two people with rich hearts come together with like-minded people and share each other's happiness and happiness, so that the relationship can be stable for a long time.
So, if you have low self-esteem after a breakup, think about what you are lacking in your heart and how to supplement it.
#前任##挽回##失恋#